My Spouse Threw Away My Meer

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aspiring_sage

Part of the Furniture Now
Oct 7, 2021
556
1,945
West of the Twin Cities, MN
To be honest I wanted to talk about love, the difficulties and the joys of love, but I was too shy to talk about love, in an honest and direct way. So instead, I talked about man and a meer, and yes perhaps I should look at the man in the mirror, and ask him to change his ways of communication.
Since you’re honest enough to say this, I’ll open up some extra honesty I didn’t bring in before:

My wife hates all my pipes. She hates smoke, and all things related.
She puts up with my wild adventures, or lame ones.

I am sensitive to her concerns, and take all precautions to keep it from bothering her. We talk about it often, the habit isn’t hidden from her but she is protected from it. This is only possible because we have conversations. I don’t like the conversations, but I really really don’t like living separate lives.

Though she hates pipes, I don’t buy them without her knowledge. Small secrets make room for big secrets, and we have little tolerance for deception.

We don’t throw away each other’s things without talking to each other. But we also accumulate too much junk and could possibly get better at throwing out things…

If the “throw away” came with a message saying “I hate this pipe, threw it, let’s get you a replacement”, that could be healthy, but healthier is conversation before irrecoverable action.

The concern from these guys on the forum is because of the implication of reckless action without communication. That is a big red flag of, at best, extreme immaturity. Their words may sound too much like “tough guys” but they’re still on the right track.
 

bullet08

Lifer
Nov 26, 2018
8,932
37,913
RTP, NC. USA
To be honest I wanted to talk about love, the difficulties and the joys of love, but I was too shy to talk about love, in an honest and direct way. So instead, I talked about man and a meer, and yes perhaps I should look at the man in the mirror, and ask him to change his ways of communication.
I never thought I would understand my wife until she was giving girl advice to my younger son. "Treat her like your puppy. Give her all the love, and don't get mad at her even if she pee all over your favorite chair." If that came out my mouth, I'm sure I'll be hearing something else.
 

chopper

Lifer
Aug 24, 2019
1,480
3,317
To be honest I wanted to talk about love, the difficulties and the joys of love, but I was too shy to talk about love, in an honest and direct way. So instead, I talked about man and a meer, and yes perhaps I should look at the man in the mirror, and ask him to change his ways of communication.
Up until I read this post it was my intention to remain silent.

Throwing out a prized possession while you were away is a sign of disrespect.
Saying that it reminded her of someone in her past sounds like a ridiculous excuse.
It sounds like payback and not an action that was motivated by "love".

Now you might not even know what you did to piss her off but piss her off you did.
Did you recently respond honestly when she asked 'Does my bum look fat in this dress' for example?
Or maybe you forgot to put out the garbage before you left and this is her way of reminding you of your responsibilities?
Did she catch you admiring another female?

Who knows? Females are emotional creatures which can often trigger erratic behaviour.
As Sheldons postie said "Bitches be crazy" :eek:

None of my past girlfriends would have ever dared to throw out one of my possessions.
Not even my ex-wife and she's a real f%$#@ing bitch.
Not because I'm 6'2" and was a solid 90kg but because that would have spelled the end of the relationship because I do not tolerate disrespect [nor do I give it]

Sorry to be the one to tell you bro but this sounds like the start of the end or if not, it's a sign of what you can expect from now on.

Partners should have each others backs rather than being a source of aggravation.

Good luck to you . . . . sounds like you're going to need it.
 

rmpeeps

Lifer
Oct 17, 2017
1,122
1,765
San Antonio, TX
It’s time to put your Cowboy boots on, you do know what the pointy end is for don’t you!
“Yeah well I got to Californ-i-a, I figured it was time I headed her my way
She was talking about us and having a home and I was talking about us and livin in Uncle Henry's basement
She said what...said she didn't understand
I proceeded to take 3 or 4 steps backwards and give her a dropkick right in the crotch
I said honey I believe in treating women gentle but first you've got to get their attention.”

~ ~ Jerry Jeff Walker ~ ~
 
Jan 27, 2020
4,002
8,120
New place to live or fit about a pipe? You can get a replacement pipe much easier than a place to live. If she is accepting of a collection of synthesizers and nun-chucks, well you may be glad it was only a pipe. So do you have a picture of this pipe?
Yes. But all my pipe photos are locked on my Myspace and I can't think of the dang password!
 
Jan 27, 2020
4,002
8,120
Since you’re honest enough to say this, I’ll open up some extra honesty I didn’t bring in before:

My wife hates all my pipes. She hates smoke, and all things related.
She puts up with my wild adventures, or lame ones.

I am sensitive to her concerns, and take all precautions to keep it from bothering her. We talk about it often, the habit isn’t hidden from her but she is protected from it. This is only possible because we have conversations. I don’t like the conversations, but I really really don’t like living separate lives.

Though she hates pipes, I don’t buy them without her knowledge. Small secrets make room for big secrets, and we have little tolerance for deception.

We don’t throw away each other’s things without talking to each other. But we also accumulate too much junk and could possibly get better at throwing out things…

If the “throw away” came with a message saying “I hate this pipe, threw it, let’s get you a replacement”, that could be healthy, but healthier is conversation before irrecoverable action.

The concern from these guys on the forum is because of the implication of reckless action without communication. That is a big red flag of, at best, extreme immaturity. Their words may sound too much like “tough guys” but they’re still on the right track.

I didn't make the existence of my meer pipe a secret but I did tell her I found it in the laundry room here. People leave nice things on a table in the laundry room of our apartment building so other people might enjoy. I hope who gave away their meer wasn't for some reason looking in the building's dumpster and saw that it was thrown away.
 
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