The (Un)Official PipesMagazine Secret Santa Thread 2022!

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woodsroad

Lifer
Oct 10, 2013
11,582
15,255
SE PA USA
This thread is perdurable. Abraham Van Helsing couldn’t kill it, not if he drove a stake through its heart, cut off its head, and crammed garlic into its mouth. That didn’t work with Mariah Carey and it wouldn’t work here.
For the record, her mouth was already full of garlic when I met her. She also had a complete set of the 1973 Encyclopedia Britannica in there, too. And some extra shoes.
 

jguss

Lifer
Jul 7, 2013
2,413
6,220
For the record, her mouth was already full of garlic when I met her. She also had a complete set of the 1973 Encyclopedia Britannica in there, too. And some extra shoes.

I was reviewing a physical inventory certified by KMPG and you barely scratched the surface. Their report (prepared on a LIFO basis) is somewhat whimsically entitled "Carey's Cavernous Maw, or the Undiscovered Country from Whose Bourn No Traveller Returns". Among other items KPMG listed Vermeer's The Concert, an intelligible copy of the 18.5 minute gap on the Watergate tapes, Judge Crater, a splinter of the true cross, and the gold of Tolosa.

I should add that this report was one of a series each covering a different orifice.
 
May 9, 2021
1,660
3,535
55
Geoje Island South Korea
Sorry to disappoint so many... rotf

More practically, I reasoned that I did not know the age of the product and there was a high probability that some or all of the bottles would be dried out and no good by next year.

NO ONE wants a dried and crusty Mariah, (I hope)



View attachment 193562
Ahi Ka would've been thrilled to receive that!
 

vates

Starting to Get Obsessed
Sep 16, 2019
275
496
The thread is nice. Appreciate MC (probably, because I don't have the stigma). But the package is still en-route.
 

JJ_JJ_JJ_JJ

Can't Leave
Sep 13, 2022
370
1,354
How to prepare for the end of secret santa 2022.
1, Reflect on your secret santa experience.
2, Be excited about your secret santa gift.
3, Smoke your secret santa gift eat your secret santa cookies and candy et cetera.
4, Post high praise about your secret santa.
5, Think of new memes for secret santa 2023.View attachment 194172
5 stages of secret Santa grief
 
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