All Pipe Smokers are Weird...Except You and Me.

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Searock Fan

Lifer
Oct 22, 2021
2,202
6,045
Southern U.S.A.
Title edited: no all caps! Original:

ALL PIPE SMOKERS ARE WEIRD... EXCEPT YOU AND I.

Just for fun.... tell us about some pipe smokers you've know who had weird habits or quirks regarding their pipes and smoking. Over the years I've met quite a few and I'm sure some of you have too. I'll start....

Back when I owned and operated a pipe shop I had a customer who would come in now and then, take a seat, pour a cup of coffee and smoke his pipe for a while. Ok, so far so good, but here's the thing. After every puff he would stop, run a fresh pipe cleaner through the pipe, stir the tobacco, tap, relight and take another (only one) puff. Then the process would start over again. This never varied and it would usually take over a hour to get through one bowl. I really had to bite my tongue not to say something, but I managed to keep quiet. Wonder if he still does it. puffy
 
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I used to look in on an older gentleman in my neighborhood, RIP, who smoked a pipe... just one pipe, and ONLY Prince Albert. He was cantankerous to put it mildly. He hated any talk of pipes or tobaccos, making jokes at how I had a different pipe every time I checked in on him. If I mentioned what I was smoking or ANYTHING concerning pipes, he would just tell me to shut the hell up and get off of his property.
I had made a promise to his daughter to check on him daily and send an update to her, but I was always happy when I would walk up and he would be on his porch, so that I only had to wave and say, "hello." Then, all I had to do was text her, "The SOB is still breathing." and it was all good.

I have absolutely no idea where people get this idea that pipesmokers are good, contemplative people. Ha ha,
 

verporchting

Lifer
Dec 30, 2018
3,002
9,274
I had a friend (now passed) who claimed that Meerschaum pipes were like smoking out of a toilet bowl and the taste was horrible, which was interesting because he had a massive collection of beautiful meers. 🤷🏼‍♂️

He would wander around with an unloaded briar in his mouth and I never once saw him actually smoking a pipe although he had a large collection of briar pipes in addition to his meers.

I guess he was a pipe smoker? Saw him smoking a lot of cigars anyway.
 
Jan 30, 2020
2,198
7,279
New Jersey
I used to look in on an older gentleman in my neighborhood, RIP, who smoked a pipe... just one pipe, and ONLY Prince Albert. He was cantankerous to put it mildly. He hated any talk of pipes or tobaccos, making jokes at how I had a different pipe every time I checked in on him. If I mentioned what I was smoking or ANYTHING concerning pipes, he would just tell me to shut the hell up and get off of his property.
I had made a promise to his daughter to check on him daily and send an update to her, but I was always happy when I would walk up and he would be on his porch, so that I only had to wave and say, "hello." Then, all I had to do was text her, "The SOB is still breathing." and it was all good.

I have absolutely no idea where people get this idea that pipesmokers are good, contemplative people. Ha ha,
There’s an older gentlemen on the main street we walk our dog sometimes who smokes a pipe. Recently he was on his porch as we walked past and my wife says “I love the smell of your pipe, what are you smoking?”. He smiled and says captain black. She points to me and says he smokes a pipe too and he looks at me and says “Gold”.

I then asked him what pipe is he smoking…….he looks at me, looks at his pipe, looks at me “I don’t know!” And begins to laugh out loud.

Unlike your example, this guy is nice and funny but I definitely think a discussion about pipes and tobacco would not be fruitful. Though I may try one day if we cross paths again!
 
There’s an older gentlemen on the main street we walk our dog sometimes who smokes a pipe. Recently he was on his porch as we walked past and my wife says “I love the smell of your pipe, what are you smoking?”. He smiled and says captain black. She points to me and says he smokes a pipe too and he looks at me and says “Gold”.

I then asked him what pipe is he smoking…….he looks at me, looks at his pipe, looks at me “I don’t know!” And begins to laugh out loud.

Unlike your example, this guy is nice and funny but I definitely think a discussion about pipes and tobacco would not be fruitful. Though I may try one day if we cross paths again!
Our Fire Chief is a Grabow Guy. Super nice, the same as yours. But, I also couldn't discuss pipes or even tobaccos with him, because it would just be me teaching him all of the brands and different types of tobaccos, ha ha.
 

HawkeyeLinus

Lifer
Oct 16, 2020
5,815
42,063
Iowa
Last person I saw light a pipe in public was in North Berwick five years ago. He was nice and his dog was friendly - they seemed a good match for each other. On the other hand the guy with the Leonberger pup didn't smoke a pipe - really nice guy as well. But who would you put your money on for weird just seeing their photo, lol?

IMG_0365.jpegDSCF0598.jpeg
 

David D. Davidson

Starting to Get Obsessed
Jul 19, 2023
200
775
Canada
Last person I saw light a pipe in public was in North Berwick five years ago. He was nice and his dog was friendly - they seemed a good match for each other. On the other hand the guy with the Leonberger pup didn't smoke a pipe - really nice guy as well. But who would you put your money on for weird just seeing their photo, lol?
I say this with nothing but love in my heart - the latter gentleman looks like he might take your firstborn if you couldn’t guess his name 🤔 I admire the impish energy he exudes, it’s aspirational for me
 

bluegrassbrian

Your Mom's Favorite Pipe Smoker
Aug 27, 2016
6,625
63,637
41
Louisville
Here in Louisville we have a big Baptist seminary. That's Bible college to you and me.
Apparently the head baptizer is a known pipe smoker, thus some of his young acolytes get the wild idea to try it out too.
They tend to gravitate towards Kremers, where the club gathers on Saturdays.
So over the years there's been a dozen or so young pipe fanciers that find their way in to our presence. Most don't make it back a second or third time.
There has been one that became somewhat a regular. Nice enough guy I guess. He's a spitter though.
He SPITS when he smokes. Every 5 or 10 minutes while smoking he will SPIT right there on the deck or the sidewalk - wherever we are. I think that's kinda gross.
 

HopHand

Starting to Get Obsessed
May 17, 2021
189
383
38
Montrose Colorado
1st please don't be insulting. I'm as weird as they come and darn proud of it😉
Now that said. Other than a few tweekers and poor white trash type taking one hitter puffs of super discount cig baccy from weed pipes. I never knew a pipe smoker tell a year after I started smoking myself and to date every pipe smoker I've encountered has been almost exactly the same.
They all have a Ziploc bag of dust dry tobacco. The name of which they can't remember. If they ever bothered to know the name in the first place. They smoke from a cheap unknown basket pipe or cob. The pipe being so dirty and gummed up that the stem likely doesn't come out and in order to smoke it they have to run a twig or wire down the stem between each bowl.
Tamping is done with a lighter butt, empty hunting rifle casing or dirty finger. They smoke the gurggluest smoke you've ever heard. Like freight trains polluting the air with the Smell of burning tobacco tar and cheap tobacco while relighting it like a weed pipe with almost every puff. They do this tell it vomits forth dottle and tar to the point they can no longer tolerate it. They then ether Wipe the mouth piece clean and keep going or stamp it out tell next time.
The crazy part is they look at me and actually call me. Crazed, weird and wasteful because I have not only clean pipes that cost more than 20$ but more than one pipe. Know the name of my Tobacco and have more than one type. Then are baffled by the fact I can keep it burning and go on and on and on about how good it smells. In between insults and heckling.
But while willing to try a Tobacco or two and happy to accept a few pipe cleaners So far none have been willing to change the way the go about it.
I'm actually starting a pipe club the 17th of next month in the hopes of meeting a pipe smoker with smoking habits more in line with what I expected after reading and researching online. I'm not overly optimistic I will but we shall see.
 
1st please don't be insulting. I'm as weird as they come and darn proud of it😉
Now that said. Other than a few tweekers and poor white trash type taking one hitter puffs of super discount cig baccy from weed pipes. I never knew a pipe smoker tell a year after I started smoking myself and to date every pipe smoker I've encountered has been almost exactly the same.
They all have a Ziploc bag of dust dry tobacco. The name of which they can't remember. If they ever bothered to know the name in the first place. They smoke from a cheap unknown basket pipe or cob. The pipe being so dirty and gummed up that the stem likely doesn't come out and in order to smoke it they have to run a twig or wire down the stem between each bowl.
Tamping is done with a lighter butt, empty hunting rifle casing or dirty finger. They smoke the gurggluest smoke you've ever heard. Like freight trains polluting the air with the Smell of burning tobacco tar and cheap tobacco while relighting it like a weed pipe with almost every puff. They do this tell it vomits forth dottle and tar to the point they can no longer tolerate it. They then ether Wipe the mouth piece clean and keep going or stamp it out tell next time.
The crazy part is they look at me and actually call me. Crazed, weird and wasteful because I have not only clean pipes that cost more than 20$ but more than one pipe. Know the name of my Tobacco and have more than one type. Then are baffled by the fact I can keep it burning and go on and on and on about how good it smells. In between insults and heckling.
But while willing to try a Tobacco or two and happy to accept a few pipe cleaners So far none have been willing to change the way the go about it.
I'm actually starting a pipe club the 17th of next month in the hopes of meeting a pipe smoker with smoking habits more in line with what I expected after reading and researching online. I'm not overly optimistic I will but we shall see.
I’m not going to say it… not going to… nope, nope, nope… I’m not going to say that this is how I see all cob smokers. Nope… I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings.
Ok, crap. I did it, didn’t I? Crap. Yeh, yeh, yeh… I’m a snob, ha ha. I guess I can live with that. puffy
 

HopHand

Starting to Get Obsessed
May 17, 2021
189
383
38
Montrose Colorado
I'm not weird, I only have over 300 pipes. nnnn
I consider that goals. Though I can't imagine how I would avoid the Orange jump suit house with the never ending. You don't need another pipe, don't you have enough pipes, how many pipes do you really need input from every friend, family member and casual acquaintance I know. I swear it's worse and more frequent than new baby advice🤬🤬🤬
 
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