Views from Older Gents on Sex, Love, and Relationships in the 21st Century

[mawnansmiff]

"I believe that communication, respect and sharing the workload are essential to a relationship. When those things work, sex should come naturally."

Very well put Workman, I totally agree.

However the flipside of this is when things turn sour, this can currently be seen in our High Courts with some guy called Depp and a lady called Heard flaunting all their collective dirty laundry for all the world to see....and what tragic viewing it makes!

Regards,

Jay.?

 

[Richmond B. Funkenhouser]

here's how it goes.. sex, sex, 100 to 200 bjs, love, marriage, then.. child support!

Unless youre lucky like me! haha

 

[pipestud]

Great picture! How’d you end up with her you lucky dog you!

Why, my obvious good looks, of course.

 

[workman]

"I believe that communication, respect and sharing the workload are essential to a relationship. When those things work, sex should come naturally."

Very well put Workman, I totally agree.

However the flipside of this is when things turn sour, this can currently be seen in our High Courts with some guy called Depp and a lady called Heard flaunting all their collective dirty laundry for all the world to see....and what tragic viewing it makes!

Regards,

Jay.?

I've seen those headlines. They make me think that maybe excess money and fame don't necessarily lead to happiness.
Luckily I never liked Johnny Depp anyway. I'm more of a Clint Eastwood or Robert Duvall kinda guy.

 

[Bowie]

My only advice is to never give up those things you enjoy doing because you think you need to devote every night or weekend to a woman. Certainly don't give something up because she doesn't like it. Maybe you can no longer go fishing every weekend, but don't stop going at all. Your existence and happiness are linked to your relationship, but should never be 100% linked. Overlapping circles etc etc.

Honestly, at some point in a relationship you'll mumble to yourself that you just want some dang peace and quiet.

 

[workman]

Honestly, at some point in a relationship you'll mumble to yourself that you just want some dang peace and quiet

I mumble that all the time.

 

[bullet08]

With the virus situation and all, do you really want to meet a total stranger and start sucking on her tonsils? If you do, you'll have to find your target and go ask. I don't think it changed much from last century. You gotta take a chance, and if it works out, great. If not, you still have your pipes and other toys. Don't think too much into love, sex, and what not. Pick up a sports and go get good workout. Drink some beer, light up a bowl and relax.

 

[renfield]

Know who you are and what your values are and be comfortable with that person. At that point the odds of having a meaningful relationship are a lot better, if that’s what you’re after.

 

[jaytex1969]

Also, keep in mind that no one is perfect.

Or, as a demented one once put it:

No matter how cute they are, someone, somewhere, is sick of their shit...

 

[mso489]

When Covid social isolation started, I joked it would have no bearing on the birthrate. The couples who are isolated together will propagate more than usual, and the singles who aren't won't get out enough to get pregnant. In fact, supposedly, the rate of premature births has declined, hypothetically because the expectant moms are less stressed and get more sleep.

 

[captainsousie]

People always say you find your significant other when you quit looking for them. I don’t think there’s anything magical in that scenario, other than I think you are more relaxed, more nonchalant, and more yourself, when you are not really trying. I think that’s what makes the difference.

True words were never spoken. Of all the people in truly long term relationships (15 years plus) they all but 2 found the person when they stopped looking. That includes my wifey's grandparents. Like you say, we sort of stop pretending and just look for someone to talk to. I found my wife later than expected when I just started talking to my friend instead of looking for a girlfriend. It didn't hurt that my friend was the most beautiful woman I knew. I was just my stupid self and listened to her...turned out that she liked honesty like that.

 

[brian64]

You could try limiting your choices to women who smoke in the house...that should simplify things quite a bit these days.

 

[captainsousie]

...I always assumed that even in marriage as a man grows old the sex becomes secondary...

Oddly enough, I've not found that to be true. After 15 years of marriage and being over 40, it just changes, doesn't disappear. Could be the fact that we can't have kids though, makes the act harmless which helps immensely.

Of course the in-laws are a bit close where we are currently staying due to covid so we've been subjected to a bit of their "fun" as well...dang thin walls in modern homes. ?

 

[georged]

What I want to know is how a leathery, old, wears-a-cowboy-hat-even-when-takin'-a-shower hardcore Texan like Mr. P. Stud landed a killer babe like that. One who even smokes a pipe on occasion?!

There must be more to the story...

 

[davek]

The important thing is to treat women with respect as unique human beings.

The broads love that shit.

 

[davek]

In all seriousness, online dating worked for me, but only the second time around.

The second time, I looked at it as a review process, something like speed dating. Get chatting with a lot of girls on the site, winnow that down to less who's e-mails you actually get, even less who you talk to on the phone, less you date.

AND TAKE YOUR TIME.

Go very slow as to finding someone to "go steady"with. Porn is an asset in that process. (maybe)

 

[pipestud]

What I want to know is how a leathery, old, wears-a-cowboy-hat-even-when-takin'-a-shower hardcore Texan like Mr. P. Stud landed a killer babe like that. One who even smokes a pipe on occasion?!

There must be more to the story...

LOL!

Yes sir, there is more to the story. Truthfully, it was not my good looks since I don't have any of that. It was not my money because I don't have any of that either. I did have a beautiful young palomino quarter horse mare that she fell in love with and I told her she could have it if she married me. She accepted my offer. Mia Rose (the name of the mare) is still with us, So, my wife is still with me.

 

[brandaves]

Most of us reach an age when we don't necessarily stop caring about what others think, but it stops driving our decisions if that makes sense. I have many friends and acquaintances who based their decision to marry on what others thought of their partner and not enough on what was really there. Sure, marrying the most objectively "pretty" girl seems like a great idea and others may be outwardly envious of the sexually appealing partner you have...but that is lust talking, not the substance of a relationship. The outward beauty of a person and your physical attraction to them is certainly an important factor, however you also need to be able to enjoy their company while not between the sheets. I have been married for 12 years, not an unbelievable amount of time but I love my wife. She is my best friend and we enjoy each others company. I'd rather sit and have a cup of coffee and conversation with her then I would just about anything. We aren't the same in a lot of respects, but similarity in all things doesn't make a pair compatible. She tolerates my love of baseball as well as my pipes and tobacco. I tolerate her need to buy another pillow (seriously, I don't understand the number of pillows we have let alone the need for more). We respect each others space but choose to be together more often then not...it's the choice to be together that makes it. When we have problems we talk about it. She may not always agree with me and I don't always agree with her, but we respect each others view.

Her great great uncle and aunt came to our wedding. They had been married more than 60 years at that point. I asked him the secret to marriage and this was his reply:

"When we got married we agreed that I would make all of the important decisions and she would make all other decisions. So far there haven't been any important decisions." Maybe that's the secret...

 

[ssjones]

I used to have a photo of Steve at an long past pipe show, with two assistants. That explains everything, but somehow, I lost that photo (taken out out of a decade old The Pipe Collector issue).

I just celebrated 40 years of marriage with this lady, so it works for me.

 

[pappymac]

I found my wife when I was pretty young (19), but I found her after I had broken up with a girl, was frustrated, and basically just said “to hell with it, I’m not dating anyone else for a while.” People always say you find your significant other when you quit looking for them. I don’t think there’s anything magical in that scenario, other than I think you are more relaxed, more nonchalant, and more yourself, when you are not really trying. I think that’s what makes the difference.

I was 22 and had spent the previous three years screwing my way without a conscience through available women in western Washington and ports of call in Hawaii, New Zealand, Chili, Peru, Mexico and Alaska. Then I met the woman I would marry four months later. Next month will be our 45th anniversary. Neither of us were looking for a lifetime soulmate at the time but we found each other.