Axioms

[aldecaker]

Oh, and as my old Grand Dad used to say, "When your heart's in the right place place, your head is usually up your ass".

 

[shikano53]

What's poontang?

Is that Elbonian for tobacco? :rofl:

 

[johnnyreb]

"It doesn't matter how big a ranch you own or how many cows you brand, the size of your funeral is still gonna depend on the weather." - Harry Truman

 

[derfatdutchman]

No good deed goes unpunished.

Don't itch for something, you are not willing to scratch for.

 

[mso489]

The best way to prevent rain is to carry an umbrella.
A new broom sweeps cleanest, but an old broom knows where the dirt is.

 

[johnnyreb]

“I’ll Do It Later”
Don't procrastinate!

 

[Perique]

Don't wrestle with a pig. You both get dirty and the pig likes it.

 

[sablebrush52]

Every silver lining has a cloud.
The pulse in the supposedly disconnected electrified cattle fence will hit you at the exact moment that you are straddling it.
You can fly farther than you ever imagined.

 

[dottiewarden]

Never say never!

 

[Chasing Embers]

A pipe gives a wise man time to think, and a fool something to stick in his mouth.
If it jams, force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.

 

[cosmicfolklore]

Want in one hand, crap in the other, and see which one fills up faster.
If you're going to see if you can fly, start from the ground, not the top of tallest building.

 

[fadingdaylight]

Holding grudges is like drinking poison and hoping the other person dies.

 

[Chasing Embers]

The light at the end of the tunnel is the headlamp of an oncoming train.

 

[fadingdaylight]

Question everything.

 

[johnnyreb]

"First getting shot, then getting married - bad habits". Cole Younger

 

[johnnyreb]

Double post.

 

[fadingdaylight]

Know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em... Lol.

 

[aldecaker]

@gtclark: 4)Never go longer than six months without re-watching The Princess Bride!

 

[shikano53]

1 is none and 2 are 1

context:
If you have only 1 flashlight, 1 can opener, 1 chem stick; it will fail.

 

[johnnyreb]

"I have a simple philosophy: Fill what's empty. Empty what's full. Scratch where it itches." Alice Roosevelt Longworth