Beware Exploding Lighters!

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sittingbear

Part of the Furniture Now
Jul 20, 2015
664
3,143
Olympia, WA
I work in the local emergency room. Yesterday, an elderly patient came in by ambulance after they had suffered severe burns to their face, neck, and ears. Their hair was singed and black, crispy ashes were falling onto the pillow. The entire room smelled like burnt hair and the patient was in tremendous pain. It turns out, this patient was lighting their tobacco pipe when their lighter exploded catching their shirt on fire (that it was tobacco and not something else was verified by the EMS team). They ran to the bathroom to extinguish themselves before calling 911. They were subsequently transferred to a level one trauma center.

I may switch to using matches exclusively.....
 

georged

Lifer
Mar 7, 2013
5,625
14,706
I work in the local emergency room. Yesterday, an elderly patient came in by ambulance after they had suffered severe burns to their face, neck, and ears. Their hair was singed and black, crispy ashes were falling onto the pillow. The entire room smelled like burnt hair and the patient was in tremendous pain. It turns out, this patient was lighting their tobacco pipe when their lighter exploded catching their shirt on fire (that it was tobacco and not something else was verified by the EMS team). They ran to the bathroom to extinguish themselves before calling 911. They were subsequently transferred to a level one trauma center.

I may switch to using matches exclusively.....

You said an elderly patient, but then referred to him in the plural seven times.

So, was it one guy, or two, or five, or an entire crowd? Did you mean to say "elderly patients"? Either that or you used a plural pronoun in error. (There is no "C")

Asking because an accurate idea of the (apparent) explosive power of lighters is important to many members of this board. (Modern matches get suckier every year)
 

georged

Lifer
Mar 7, 2013
5,625
14,706
I suspect the OP used those terms intentionally so as to not reveal the patient's gender for confidentiality reasons...HIPAA rules and all that.

The way to have accomplished that and avoid confusion about the explosive power of a lighter was to use the singular pronoun "it."

If applicable that is. If not applicable---meaning some number of people between two and infinity were burned and ended up in his ER---then "it" would not be correct. (still waiting on the clarification)
 

cersono

Starting to Get Obsessed
Feb 11, 2016
178
258
Vallis Lacrimarum
After he makes a full recovery
What if different blends were involved in the accident? For example, while he was trying to light up FVF, she preferred Borkum Riff, ze choose Captain Black and xe insisted on cracking open a vintage tin of Balkan Sobranie (how many else of those "inclusive pronouns" have been invented to day?) - though none of them succeeded.
 

georged

Lifer
Mar 7, 2013
5,625
14,706
What if different blends were involved in the accident? For example, while he was trying to light up FVF, she preferred Borkum Riff, ze choose Captain Black and xe insisted on cracking open a vintage tin of Balkan Sobranie (how many else of those "inclusive pronouns" have been invented to day?) - though none of them succeeded.

This guy ^^^^ would make a good murder detective. A scenario-minded questioner who understands the importance of speculative details while thinking outside the box. Joe Kenda 2.0

About time the world had another pipe smoker in that job.
 

cersono

Starting to Get Obsessed
Feb 11, 2016
178
258
Vallis Lacrimarum
SPOILER:
...in the final chapter, the arsonist is revealed to be xe!

Xe had been systematically and intentionally mis-pronoun-sed by the bigoted him out of envy that xe outbid him on the auction for the mentioned vintage tin of Balkan Sobranie.
Burning of her was qualified an unintended collateral damage.
Ze happened to be an accidental victim of friendly fire.
 

proteus

Lifer
May 20, 2023
1,281
2,183
53
Connecticut (shade leaf tobacco country)
The way to have accomplished that and avoid confusion about the explosive power of a lighter was to use the singular pronoun "it."

If applicable that is. If not applicable---meaning some number of people between two and infinity were burned and ended up in his ER---then "it" would not be correct. (still waiting on the clarification)
If gender avoidance is the reason I would have used "this person". Could also use PT medical abbreviation in this specific case or patient spelled out. I personally avoid any and all pronouns and the incorrect use of they/them in all personnel matters these days. Don't want to lose my retirement.
 
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