Another thread produced an abundance of delightfully pejorative wife-made statements about tobacco blends. Witness:
@cosmic
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@philobeddoe
Wife One-Liner Reviews
- Thread starter deathmetal
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With EVERYTHING I smoke... Wife: "that smells good, what is it?" Ok, so she smokes a pipe too... :roll:
My wife has lots of silimos when it comes to tobaccos; hot tea, herbally, dumpster fire, a sorority girl in a bikini on fire, burning tires, sophistocated, an old man's truck, pipe-y, etc... She does some humorous public speaking, so she has a touch of a gift with words. Me words no good much, so I just steal hers. :
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This is a great thread.
There's only one blend I'm banned from smoking in the house. Ten Russians
Quote from the wifey
"That smells like a burning tire."
There's only one blend I'm banned from smoking in the house. Ten Russians
Quote from the wifey
"That smells like a burning tire."
"Maybe you should try some of my potpourri you hate, cause it would smell much better than whatever that is you are smoking now."
I mistakenly opened a tin of the frog in the house once.
"I try very hard to keep this place clear of black mold, I would rather you not drag cans of it in here."
She likes the smell of some blends, but she is sure to let me know when she thinks I made a mistake.
I mistakenly opened a tin of the frog in the house once.
"I try very hard to keep this place clear of black mold, I would rather you not drag cans of it in here."
She likes the smell of some blends, but she is sure to let me know when she thinks I made a mistake.
Better than a burning corpse, I suppose.
Lakelands are banned from this house by mutual consent!
Me: calmly and happily smoking either Quiet Nights or Gaslight.
Wife, stepping into my smoking lounge(the garage): "OMG, what is that??!!! Smells like a rotten silage fire, AFTER the dead birds fell in, on a hot humid night, downwind of an industrial chicken farm next to a wretchedly stagnant holding pond."
Me: "Why thankee kindlee, ma'am." (back to calmly and happily smoking)
Such blends usually elicit such responses... it's kind of become a game now, all in good fun of course, to see how the metaphors, similes, allusions, etc, can run on.
Wife, stepping into my smoking lounge(the garage): "OMG, what is that??!!! Smells like a rotten silage fire, AFTER the dead birds fell in, on a hot humid night, downwind of an industrial chicken farm next to a wretchedly stagnant holding pond."
Me: "Why thankee kindlee, ma'am." (back to calmly and happily smoking)
Such blends usually elicit such responses... it's kind of become a game now, all in good fun of course, to see how the metaphors, similes, allusions, etc, can run on.
The first....and only time I lit up a bowl of Haunted Bookshop in our house I was greeted with a firm: NO...just NO! Luckily I didn't care for it, so no bother in keeping it around for lunting. Mind you this is a woman who actually enjoys the smell of Latakia and has never complained about any other Burley tobacco, as I smoke a lot of Solani ABF, but whatever topping is on Haunted Bookshop is not welcome in our home!
SWMBO: "Why do you smoke something which is bad for you that smells so nasty".
Me: (mutely smoking outside; better to pick one's battles)
Me: (mutely smoking outside; better to pick one's battles)
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