I received my Black XX today. I was excited, today I would take on the beast! Today I would defeat him and pull his teeth. Many cried out, no you cannot win. Fools they, HA, I would show them! Thor himself came down to watch the epic battle.
I loaded my trusty weapon, my Peterson XL02, to the top!! Gandolf the Grey arrived and counciled I was a fool, a brave fool, but a fool none the less. I laughed and shouted now is the time!! Flame to leaf, the crowd goes quiet with anticipation, waiting for beast to appear and slay me. I took sip after sip with fire in my eyes. I would not be caught unawares!! Am I worthy, AM I, I scream to the gods. I see the beast wisping out of my weapon, but he holds no fear for me! For now I know the beasts weakness......he tastes like creamy, wonderful steak. I will slay this beast, no steak will slay me, oh no not ME!!
He stares at me, he tries to break my mind. Then reaches for my body, but is stopped by my hard glare. My mouth smiles, but my eyes scream VICTORY!! As I watch the beast screams, begins to tear at itself. He knows he has lost, he has no more attacks left.
I have won!!! The beast begins to shrink and shrink, screaming as it does. I raise my warriors boot and crush him underfoot!! I hear the lamentations of his women and I find it GOOD!! I ransack his palice and ride away with much treasure, but none as important as his beloved Black XX!!