One Of Lifes Sad Truths

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bigvan

Lifer
Mar 22, 2011
2,192
12
I’m torn... on one hand I have several jars of tobacco which I don’t smoke much anymore so I could easily donate them to someone more in need. But on the other hand, I have the feeling I would be encouraging (and rewarding) the attitude of “complain long enough and someone will give you what you want”.
I’ll have to think about this.

 

daveinlax

Charter Member
May 5, 2009
2,001
2,711
WISCONSIN
You know what? Aussielass is right, it seems as if you are always whining. Man do something about it! I suggest going into the service! If you don't want to see fighting then join the Navy or Coast Guard! The Navy did me good. A steady paycheck, travel, and adventure!!

There you go! I know a guy who was a Baker in the Navy he put in his 20 retired with a nice little pension and healthcare. He has a good life with his pension and working as a baker a couple days a week hunting and fishing the rest of the time. 8O

 

mluyckx

Lifer
Dec 5, 2011
1,958
3
Texas
Uber,
I thought long and hard before writing this.
You're doing fine ! You're going to school, you're trying, don't get discouraged. You're doing a lot better than many of the 16-23 year olds I'm a life coach for. So hang in there, you'll make it.
I'm not going to tell you my life story.. it's boring after all ;-) I'm also not going to be as harsh as some others. But here are a couple of pieces of wisdom. Close the post if you don't feel like reading them ;-)
1) It is unlikely that in this lifetime you will always be able to afford what you want. Unless you win the lottery or make it big, there will always be items one can't afford. Get used to not getting every material thing you see, want or like. Sure, right now you just want that nice used estate. But once you have more money, you want that nice new one, then the next nice one, then the thousand dollar Dunhill, etc.. it's starts small, but you will end up feeling never satisfied. And then, when (when.. not if) things go less well, money get tighter or you lose a job... that's when people jump of buildings because their material world collapses.
2) I heard you say you have a pipe. I saw you post on a question about English blends that you've tried many tobaccos,

Penzance, Countryside, Balkan Luxury Blend 957, Mississippi Mud, and any of the Frog Mortons

Dude, you're trying and smoking more tobacco's than many here on the forum ! I'm not going to repeat what your dad said. It's not gonna help. And even though I wasn't going to share my life story, here's one comparison. At 19 I had two nameless pipes, a pack of RYO papers and usually a pouch of Drum, Ajja or Amphora in my pocket. I'd scour bars for matches or a cheap Bic lighter. When the pouch was empty and I couldn't afford one, I'd get the little stubs or dottle out of my ashtray. Gross ? Sure.. did it smoke and allow me to sit back and relax. You bet. It didn't get better for me until I was about 23-24 and had a steady job. And just like you, I went to school, busted my chops and had all the frustration you're having right now. But hang in there, it will get better.
In the mean time, I'm sorry to say, but it's going to be a "deal with it" kinda world. Just like your topic said: "One of lives sad Truths" Sure someone may send you something to help you out once in a while. We all need a helping hand once in a while. But don't count on it. Unless you want to live the rest of your life depending on the hand-outs of others. Right now, you have a pipe, you have tobacco. Enjoy them. Work hard to get a step up. I'm living proof it's possible. As are many others on this forum.
In the mean time, feel free to PM me if you'd like someone to just talk to, vent or commiserate with.
Hope this at least was able to encourage you a bit.

 

uberam3rica

Lifer
Sep 7, 2011
4,015
9
Capac, Michigan
I'm not asking for handouts, and I dont expect them. I'm just saying it's a down economy, I'm broke, and that for me baccy is expensive. And I asked who was in my position. I'm sorry that I wine about money a lot. Being poor isnt easy for me. My family was very well off, and in just six years we went to poverty level.

 

aussielass

Part of the Furniture Now
Oct 18, 2011
513
1
I'm not going to tell you my life story.. it's boring after all I'm also not going to be as harsh as some others. But here are a couple of pieces of wisdom."
Who's been harsh, prey tell? Wisdom comes from experience, far more than so than anything else imo, so here's another snippet of my life story, err "wisdom", sorry to bore ya'll, but my wisdom tells me to inspire and/or enthrall this kid instead of simply giving material things after reading his posts...
Uber, I was living on a small farm with my fiance and my 13 week old baby. We had demolished the tiny farmhouse cottage and were renovating it - it had no windows, no doors and virtually no roof and no kitchen ...we were blissfully happy and my wedding dress was being made. Saturday morning we went to my Dad's farm to test ride a quad bike for him - David never came back from that ride, it crashed off the bank down into the creek below that was about 4' deep, landed on top of him and he died after 40 mins of CPR whilst the ambulance got lost 3 times.
Now, I had absolutely NO money, not a single cent, a house that was just a shell, exposed to the elements and no-one to help, no-one to turn to, no insurance and no income. I borrowed $7k from my dad and went to every junk and salvage shop buying old windows and doors for a song dragging them the 100 miles home, a fry pan instead of a stove and a year's supply of tissues. I left the baby in her rocker, got up on that roof and drilled in every tech-screw myself and siliconed each one once it was in. All the while the sun kept moving and that baby was fried until I would climb down and move her again and again, howling and sobbing the whole time.
After 6 months when the house has at least semi-weatherproof, I went and started a wheelin' and dealin', buying and selling business with a girlfriend, but I was still howling and sobbing all day every day for my lost love and always over the real cruel fact of life and the cards it had dealt me. We made more money than we could spend, we 2 x single mums who were doing it tough, real bloody tough ... hell, we could even eat real meat again a couple of times a week!
Fast forward 21 years to now ... my best friend, ex partner and father of my 11 yo son who lives in the apartment next to me has just been having bone marrow tests and such (only something they do when they suspect a critical medical condition). All we have, besides a massive mortgage, huge credit cards debts etc. is health insurance, hallelujah for that at least!
Moral of the story - when the going gets tough, the tough have got to get going, pull their head out their ass no matter how hard and hopeless things seem, to be and do whatever it takes to get ahead of the wolves wanting to take a piece of them and what they work for.
Look forward to your future instead of allowing yourself to get trapped in this overly obvious "poverty mentality" .... you have your whole life ahead of you, but you sure as hell never know how many hours, days, weeks or years that may be given to you. Every day you spend miserable and wallowing in self-pity for whatever reason is a day that brings you closer to death, and you never get that miserable day back to turn it around. Money is the VERY LAST reason anyone should let themselves get down and out about - it's out there just waiting to be made, you just gotta find the inner strength and then use every ounce of energy & wherewithall to go after it. Are you man enough?
That ain't harsh or tough, it's fact, and it's life (not a sad fact at all), live it boy, live it!!!

 

philip

Lifer
Oct 13, 2011
1,705
6
Puget Sound
The hard truth is that it is our human nature to want more than what we have. Getting stuff won't help.

If you are going to be content, that has to come from something within.
Read I Timothy 6:8

 

baronsamedi

Lifer
May 4, 2011
5,688
5
Dallas
The restaurant world needs great bakers but starting out means long hours slave wages and extremely difficult standards of production. My suggestion is ply your trade. Bake your ass off and hustle your wares to anyone who will buy any time of day. Now is the time to make a name for yourself and turn your situation into a positive. If you're underemployed, you have time! Sleep when you're rich or dead!

 

sherlock

Can't Leave
Aug 21, 2011
464
6
I feel you on the money. It sounds like you are on the right track by going to school. There are few people who have said that should join the military, which is a good option, but there are a lot of things you can do if you don't want join the military. There's the Peace Corp, Church missionary groups, Americorp, etc. Many of them will give you experience in your field. It doesn't sound like your asking for handouts or whining to me, sometimes you just have to get things off your chest, just grab a pipe and enjoy the tobacco while you have it, because before you know it it will be gone for good. Goes for life as well.

 

mluyckx

Lifer
Dec 5, 2011
1,958
3
Texas
Uber,

Sorry your family fell on hard times. I really mean that. The fact that there's 1,000's like that doesn't change a dime on how you feel. As aussielas said, most of us have been there, done that.
Focus on something else. You're on the right path, keep trucking, hang in there just like we all did at one time or another. You'll make it.
The point I was trying to make was quite astutely summarized by Philip
The hard truth is that it is our human nature to want more than what we have. Getting stuff won't help.
Cheer up old chum'." Light up another bowl of whatever you have and enjoy it. And one day you'll sit back, remember and give another young lad a piece of advice.

 

harrumphicus

Starting to Get Obsessed
Dec 9, 2011
136
0
The Water
If you don't want to see fighting then join the Navy or Coast Guard! The Navy did me good. A steady paycheck, travel, and adventure!!

I would agree if this was still the "old Navy" (not the store). Two points to make that I've noticed in my last 3 years: 1) The level of bureaucracy when I joined 3 years ago was about 1/3 of what it is now, and from what I've heard, two years before that was less than 1/2 as bad. I wish I had some figures to show, but I'm sure our paper bill rivals our fuel/energy bill. 2) We're getting away from the "cruise" lifestyle with all the piracy running mad and "endangering" trade routes. I'll bet with Iran trying to close down the straits they put a hassle on any American ship near there. Combat may be seen for a few of those ships over there.
And most importantly, you can't smoke inside the boat anymore! :D

 

rd02sir

Can't Leave
Nov 1, 2011
415
1
"The moment money becomes your motivation, you're immediately not as good as someone who is stimulated by passion and internal will."
Sebastian Vettel

 

igloo

Lifer
Jan 17, 2010
4,083
5
woodlands tx
I will make you a deal . Show me a good report card and I shall send you tobacco as a reward . Did you go out and look for side jobs today ?

 

portascat

Lifer
Jan 24, 2011
1,057
3
Happy Hunting Grounds
When I was 16, my parents made me choose between a Corvette or Trans Am. That sucked.
Then they said i had to go to Harvard, or I would only get half of the $600K per year trust fund I am entitled to.
The prom sucked, because I couldn't decide whether to take the Victoria's Secret model, or the Brazilian bikini model.
And I get tired of women coming up to me and telling me I look like a Brad Pitt wishes he looked like. How many times a day can one man hear that?
Life SUCKS!

 

unclearthur

Lifer
Mar 9, 2010
6,875
5
It all comes down to the fact that being happy isn't having what you want. It's wanting what you have.

 

simnettpratt

Lifer
Nov 21, 2011
1,516
2
I've been very sick. Next month I will have been unemployed for two years. But, look, I'm not cold, I have a place to live that's not a homeless shelter (it was close!), I have some food, I have my computer and an internet connection, I have been able to do a few computer jobs for a little money here and there, I have some pipes, I have tobacco, my mom just paid to fix my Miata so I have a car (gas is an issue!), I can download books, games, surf forums like this, listen to music on youtube, use my pc to look for short jobs in-between getting sick, Tuesday I get to drive my mom in my little green sports car 200 miles to go to the doctor's (she's going blind and can't drive) and she'll pay for gas so I get out of the house, she's going to let me stop at Tobacco Cabana and there will probably be another ounce of baccy in it for me, I'm not sick today - I have WAY more than a lot of people.
I have I have I have. While I've never been this far down, I don't think my blood disorder is going to kill me (hopefully, and if it does, I had a good life) and I have a lot. Add some bourbon and remove the getting sick part and this would be like a damned vacation!

 
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