I agree that some hash words were spoken. Firstly protect yourself emotionally then maybe visit him and show him the comfort of friendship. He may have had a violent behavioural pattern hen younger but that may have been a result of what was forced upon him as a child. Never judge unless you know the full story and are free of judgement yourself. Sometimes people just need to know that there are those that care out there. Sure in the beginning pride will get in the way but that is a symptom of institutionalisation in my opinion, the Italian culture may be an underling trend that strengthens the pride but true friendship will win when you step up to the plate and show you care and will not abandon hope.
Once A Friend, Always A Friend
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He paid his dues and served his time. He is reaching out to his "friend." Be one, once again. Call Mental Health and let them get in his life.
Compassion and mercy. Reality and hopefulness. Kindness and understanding. We should all just live in a way that we are proud of. We fall and often return to our feet under our own stregnth. Many times though we need a shoulder to cling to and a hand to regain our footing. The world is better when everyone is accountable to themselves. What would the world be if we were only accountbale to ourselves? If I am not for myself who will be? If I am only for myself then who am I?
There was a time in my life I wasn't worth saving. Thank god someone chose to offer me a lifeline when I needed it.
When I was in the service, my helicopter hauled a lot more wounded enemy soldiers than friendlies. We hauled them to the hospital where American soldiers saved their lives. These were the same people that might have been shooting at my brothers 15 minutes before.
We did it because lives are worth saving. When someone is dying, you figure out the right or wrong of them if they continue to stay alive.
I don't know anything any thing about this guy beyond the original post. I saw this as being about someone in a bad place and in danger. He deserves to be thrown a lifeline regardless of what happened yesterday or twenty years ago.
Any fate he "earned" will be sure to visit him. Who knows maybe he'll be the guy that jumps in the river and saves one of my kids ten years from now.
I think giving this guy a little compassion is worth the chance. Throw him the lifeline. It's up to him to pull himself to safety.
When I was in the service, my helicopter hauled a lot more wounded enemy soldiers than friendlies. We hauled them to the hospital where American soldiers saved their lives. These were the same people that might have been shooting at my brothers 15 minutes before.
We did it because lives are worth saving. When someone is dying, you figure out the right or wrong of them if they continue to stay alive.
I don't know anything any thing about this guy beyond the original post. I saw this as being about someone in a bad place and in danger. He deserves to be thrown a lifeline regardless of what happened yesterday or twenty years ago.
Any fate he "earned" will be sure to visit him. Who knows maybe he'll be the guy that jumps in the river and saves one of my kids ten years from now.
I think giving this guy a little compassion is worth the chance. Throw him the lifeline. It's up to him to pull himself to safety.
Pipebaum & Ivapewithfire, very well spoken.
Your right though, who knows the good that may come in the future from Louie should he choose to accept the help offered to him. You just need to show help is out there once he realises life on the outside is achievable. He just might be in the right place at the right time to save a life as Vape said, or, he may encourage others to live life and jump at opportunities when they get out of jail and are themselves institutionalised.
EDIT: I love how this forum is not just about pipes, it's like a huge international group of mates sharing experiences and opinions.
Your right though, who knows the good that may come in the future from Louie should he choose to accept the help offered to him. You just need to show help is out there once he realises life on the outside is achievable. He just might be in the right place at the right time to save a life as Vape said, or, he may encourage others to live life and jump at opportunities when they get out of jail and are themselves institutionalised.
EDIT: I love how this forum is not just about pipes, it's like a huge international group of mates sharing experiences and opinions.
And, I'm already bored with Louie "The Lip". Granted he was slightly more interesting than the cigarette smoking Mexican cruise lady, but not by much. You've got to develop more depth into these characters Frank, they are starting to have a shelf life of less than 24 hours.
@torque... I understand where your coming from, but damn man.....I may be gullible, but the guy does deserve ONE more chance at this point.
He did the crime and served the time, a long time to be out of society. After my first disability I lived 3 years in a rehabilitation centre, had to learn to write again and the simple things like using a knife and fork. I was in a burns accident that cost me basically half of each hand, amputations, grafting, fusing etc. for many years after getting out I felt out of place in society and was looked at like I was a freak. One lady even had the balls to approach me in a pub and ask how dare I be seen in public looking like that, as if I had a choice! But I battled through and achieved a lot in life and experienced things most people don't get to do.
Moral of the story, never write a person off, they may just surprise you and make you feel guilty for your initial judgement
Moral of the story, never write a person off, they may just surprise you and make you feel guilty for your initial judgement
torque - I am blessed because of the people in my life. I grew up Italian in an Italian neighborhood. Louie has given more to me in the way of friendship than any friend I have.
BTW, all of my Italian friends had nick names. Neckbone, Coathanger, Two Toes, Scams, Knuckles, Skidmarks, and many more. We wore our nicknames like badges of honor.
I was not asking for sympathy when writing my piece, nor was I making up a character, I was merely cleansing a wound.
BTW, Louie had a job but lost it. He is awaiting VA help.
He was drafted in 1966, went to Vietnam, and was shot multiple times saving the life of another "grunt". Because of government bureaucracy, after 50 years, he is still waiting to receive the Bronze Star.
And the PTS, after the war, though not an excuse, was a contributing factor to his life as a criminal.
I know who the real Louie is. And that is the person I will always call a friend.
BTW, all of my Italian friends had nick names. Neckbone, Coathanger, Two Toes, Scams, Knuckles, Skidmarks, and many more. We wore our nicknames like badges of honor.
I was not asking for sympathy when writing my piece, nor was I making up a character, I was merely cleansing a wound.
BTW, Louie had a job but lost it. He is awaiting VA help.
He was drafted in 1966, went to Vietnam, and was shot multiple times saving the life of another "grunt". Because of government bureaucracy, after 50 years, he is still waiting to receive the Bronze Star.
And the PTS, after the war, though not an excuse, was a contributing factor to his life as a criminal.
I know who the real Louie is. And that is the person I will always call a friend.
Toby,
I'm sorry that happened. Some people are just completely devoid of common sense and decency. It's a good thing for her that I wasn't in the pub to hear it.
Frank, tell your friend to hang in there. I've been without a job before and the discouragement that can go along with it if you have trouble finding another destroys you mentally. Hopefully, his situation will improve.
I am astonished at some of the responses hurled toward Frank and his friend in need. I hope you don't live in a glass house. Judge not lest ye be judged. He who is without sin cast the first stone. There are so many more examples but those will do. Have you no empathy for the people involved with this situation. Are you so perfect that you can pronounce judgment on this relationship and that mans life and know you are right. I hope and pray you never find yourself in a situation where you will need a friend when you hit the ground and need him to help you back up.
It's the internet, are you really that surprised mustanggt? Internet warriors and the comfort of anonymity will always be abundant. If we were all sitting in a room together, it would be a very different story.
I wish the very best for your friend, Frank, and hope his situation turns around for the better.
I wish the very best for your friend, Frank, and hope his situation turns around for the better.
Yes I am surprised but not naive. I view what I am doing as sitting in a room talking to people so I act accordingly. I will not say things that I don't mean. I will not use my anonymity to say gutless things that I wouldn't say to someone's face because of it. Merry Christmas Frank to you and your friend.
You and i share similar viewpoints 'stang, but i do believe we are not in the majority. Anyone who knows me or has met me, whether here or in the real world, knows that i speak my mind and that anything i might say in a person's absence i would also say in their presence. Have i made mistakes and had to put my foot in my big mouth? Absolutely, i'm human. But i guarantee you one thing, i will be the first to man up, admit i was wrong, apologize and move on with life. I do not hold grudges or stay angry at people for very long, life is far too short for all that middle school drama bullshit.
The internet is a very warm and comfortable blanket far more often than it is a more reserved and respectful extension/reflection of a person's true character and demeanor. Context is oftentimes lost on the reader though, which contributes to a whole other laundry list of misinterpretations and misunderstandings, totally devoid of emotion lost in translation. Like others have said, there is two sides to every coin, as their is with every individual situation and dilemma you will encounter. The internet forums just make it more complicated and allow you to see less of those sides to form a truthful and knowledgeable opinion without jumping to conclusions first.
The internet is a very warm and comfortable blanket far more often than it is a more reserved and respectful extension/reflection of a person's true character and demeanor. Context is oftentimes lost on the reader though, which contributes to a whole other laundry list of misinterpretations and misunderstandings, totally devoid of emotion lost in translation. Like others have said, there is two sides to every coin, as their is with every individual situation and dilemma you will encounter. The internet forums just make it more complicated and allow you to see less of those sides to form a truthful and knowledgeable opinion without jumping to conclusions first.
I'm just glad there are others that don't hide behind the Internet to use an anominous mask to show their lack of empathy to their fellow man. This is called cyber bullying and it has taken lives. But as I said, Im glad there are people who are themselves and speak their mind and stand up to offer their opinion in support of someone looking for advice. As Frank said, this is a man who fought for his country and seen the horrors of war and now as a result he suffers Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, I suspect also heavily depressed and this seen him lead a life of crime which he paid for.
That being said, my main point is simply this - anyone can find themselves desperate for help at some point in life, if not found it can leave you ready to lash out in one way or another. Nobody is immune from desperatation, be it for themselves or one they love. Who knows where that desperation may lead and what one does as a result. But for crying out loud, don't judge another for the result of their desperation. You haven't walked a mile in their shoes and therefore would be seen as a fool by others to have judged them so quickly and harshly.
That being said, my main point is simply this - anyone can find themselves desperate for help at some point in life, if not found it can leave you ready to lash out in one way or another. Nobody is immune from desperatation, be it for themselves or one they love. Who knows where that desperation may lead and what one does as a result. But for crying out loud, don't judge another for the result of their desperation. You haven't walked a mile in their shoes and therefore would be seen as a fool by others to have judged them so quickly and harshly.
Hey, this is the guy in question AS DESCRIBED BY HIS FRIEND. The OP described a violent career criminal, you can't read that any other way. Distort it any way you want but his own friend described him in this manner. If you want to vilify me for stating that he has to live with the consequences of his own actions and decisions, well go ahead, LOL. I find that reaction to be simultaneously funny and bizarre as well as showing someone with a pretty skewed set of values. Personally my empathy will be with the victims of The Lip's criminal activities.
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