Lost Manly Arts

[foggymountain]

Here are some manly arts which might be revived;

Murdering people with a sword.

Torture

Blackmail for position or money.

Shaving with a razor, preferably home made.

Jumping over bushes with a horse.

Seducing servant girls.

Beating your wife and children.

Gambling away the family fortune and estate.

The constant use of obscenity.
Talking about obscenity, ,my wife was talking to he iphone before bed the other night. She was advising what time to set the alarm. The phone got too chatty. I requested that she tell it to shut the f--k up. She said to the phone "shut the fuck up." The phone answered "no need for obscenity."

 

[anglesey]

That art of manliness website people keep mentioning is fairly good. It's rather americanised for my tastes but I still find myself on it occasionally.
What grinds my gears is the amount of young people who cant do ANYTHING. I'm a student landlord and the amount of calls I get from supposedly intelligent people who can't even change a fuse or a lightbulb, let alone fix a hoover or unclog a sink. Try giving them a bloody power tool or a necktie to tie and there'd be disaster. The only thing a lot of these people seem capable of doing is rolling a decent joint.

 

[sablebrush52]

The only thing a lot of these people seem capable of doing is rolling a decent joint.

Not all is lost!

 

[tbradsim1]

I hear you Sable , the only manly things I do now is waking up load up my pipe, good strong cup of coffe and the best of all is a Slick Shit.

 

[mso489]

Building on foggy's post on "manly arts" that might better be left in history, I would

nominate garters to hold up mens' socks and mens' swim suits with tops. Also a lot

of really condescending language used about our women partners, like calling them

"the wife," "kiddo," "the little lady," etc. A lot of women don't like "lady' at all, since

it is a pedestal that keeps them in "their place." Let's face it, when a guy gets married,

that usually boosts the household IQ by somewhat more than one hundred percent.

At the least, I feel like marriage conferred both binocular and color vision (intellectually

speaking). If you go to a party with your wife, she can come home and explain what

happened in vivid detail, all kinds of social interactions and interpersonal politics about

which I did not have a clue, not even a hint.

 

[yaddy306]

So weep not for these lost arts! Though they may kindle nostalgia for the days of our grandparents, we are still people, and we practice many new arts to replace the old.

+1
Yeah, I miss the "good ole days" when life expectancy was 40 years, and half of all newborns died.

 

[blueeyedogre]

We had fun here at work for a bit. Everyone got 5 "man cards" and if you were caught doing something unmanly then you lost a card to the witness but if you did something extraordinarily manly the witness had to give you one. It was a silly fun game that resulted in a rise in bandaid usage and facial hair! lol

 

[cobguy]

The only thing a lot of these people seem capable of doing is rolling a decent joint ...
Not all is lost!

:rofl:

 

[drew]

I can leatherwork, try to do things with no power tools, sometimes it works, smoke a pipe (obviously) would rather live in the woods but i don't because my gf likes electricity, i do tip my hat or headnod to people who stare or whatever, I would use a sword instead of a gun to murder someone or defend my self, and you all forgot about being a hobo and I've hopped plenty of freight trains and hitchhiked in the past, i can do minor repairs to cars (not the new ones where everything is crammed in) but all this only makes me 1/16 man so i guess i have to douche now...

 

[mso489]

And let's not forget the manly art of old-geezer coughing, to assert oneself and get attention

among all the hot-shot whippersnappers who barely see you. And the old-geezer rants,

ala Saturday Live's grouchy old man who thought all of the miseries of the past were a sort

of moral superiority. "Why, when I was young, we enjoyed being dispised...." Etc.

 

[ithelouniverse]

Noticed someone mention waxing the mustache... I'm still trying to keep that alive. I wear it in several different styles, and have shaved it into different shapes over the years.
Clearly that was an excuse to show off my most recent incarnation of the handle bars.
But my vote is actually for building a fire... and not just for survival purposes, but building a nice, romantic fire in the house for yourself and the lady...

 

[captainsousie]

There has been a lively debate here and it is interesting and revealing. One thing it reveals is that there are 3 types of views on manliness historically. Those who look at life through rose colored glasses, those who look through sh!t colored glasses and those who look objectively.
It has also made me look again at myself. On one hand I don't wear hats. You could take that at face value or realize that where I live many hats find themselves blown off and into the next county. I don't shave and don't wax what facial hair I do have. I have worn pink and played with dolls with my niece. I can't shoot for crap, can't catch and I haven't been in a fight since high school. On the other hand I open the door for my lady (she enjoys that term) and treat her with as much love and respect as I am capable. I can sharpen a knife, tie knots, gut, skin, quarter and butcher an animal, and survive in the wilderness for a couple weeks. I can dress well and tie 3 different kinds of ties. I could go on but that's manly enough for me and to hell with the rest.
The funniest part? What makes me least manly in the sight of many in my area (especially the athletics coaches) is that I'm a singer. I sing classical, jazz, country, folk and other styles. That apparently means that I've got a wrist limper than Liberace's was.
The moral of this rambling? Those who know what being a "man" means will always know. Others will never know and that is the way of the world. It is up to those who know to teach the young boys around them how to be not only a man, but a good man.