Is Having too Much Personality a Liability these Days?

[puff_not_snuff]

Let's be honest. The art of conversation is more or less non-existent for those under 30 or so and is withering on the vine with the geriatric set.

 

[mso489]

My second post on this thread, but I had additional thoughts. Being talkative is like any other personality trait. It can be a blessing or a blight, depending on how you use it. When others in a group are shy and you can spark the conversation and draw others out, that can be a good thing. People who are innately quiet can sometimes be good listeners. It takes all kinds. It's a matter of matching your skills and proclivities to the situation.

You can be a bore and a blatherer, or you can be the life of the party, and the cement that holds the social network together. It just depends on how you use your traits and talents. Talkative people shouldn't muzzle themselves, and quiet people shouldn't propel themselves through a forced march of talk.

I have both problems. I have to push myself to talk, and then once I get rolling, I have to tell myself to shut the hell up.

 

[cosmicfolklore]

I've always noticed that two extroverts can carry on a conversation well for a little while, but eventually they turn into pissing contests. Outside observers usually get bored quickly when two extreme extraverts tie in. And, two extreme introverts are just dull with lots of space between comments. But, and extra and an intra tend to bounce well in a conversation. One thinking as they talk and the intra reflecting before they talk.
Most tend to think of introverts as shy, and extras as really outgoing... but that is not the case. Extra and intras merely means that they think as they speak differently.

 

[puff_not_snuff]

I've always noticed that two extroverts can carry on a conversation well for a little while, but eventually they turn into pissing contests. Outside observers usually get bored quickly when two extreme extraverts tie in. And, two extreme introverts are just dull with lots of space between comments. But, and extra and an intra tend to bounce well in a conversation. One thinking as they talk and the intra reflecting before they talk.
Most tend to think of introverts as shy, and extras as really outgoing... but that is not the case. Extra and intras merely means that they think as they speak differently.

That's very true... I would run into this guy who is into some of the same music as I am and at some point it becomes I bought such and such record x-number of years ago or I saw so or so band in someone's basement in 199?? and would leave thinking not only is the dude a boorish twat but I am too.

 

[kschatey]

I mean in regards to work and such. I'm not talkin' bout making poo-poo jokes or such but I've learned over the last few years that having too much to talk about when others have very little, this is, when they are conversing with you it's best to just pretend that you don't have much to say and don't share some esoteric detail on any given subject. None of which I wish to speak about is at all political, just cultural things, food, and day to day blather. Kinda sucks to have to sanitize your personality but money is money I guess...

Apparently yes. I was recently told that I am too aggressive and expect too much from others (nobody even wants to do the minimum for their job anymore).

 

[karam]

Apparently yes. I was recently told that I am too aggressive and expect too much from others (nobody even wants to do the minimum for their job anymore).

What’s the minimum? There is this ridiculous concept of “quiet quitting” nowadays, likely stemming from covid, working from home and having connectivity 24/7. Or as someome like me may say “working at work”. I will push myself and others for quality over quantity any and all days, but many employers and employees have gone back to some mid-Victorian Dickensian style of employees needing to sweat blood each and every day. I rather know that I can depend on my team - and my team know they can depend on me - that we will all put in the late hours and weekends when it’s needed than push everyone and myself all the time and have people drop unexpectedly, because this is what happens, and no fcuks are given by people when have been disrespected or exploited and they have created/found a way out, so there’s the risk of being left hanging at a very bad time. I have seen colleagues work late on a Friday when they are starting a new job next Tuesday and I have seen colleagues get all their time off remaining at the worst possible time for the rest of the team.
I recently put stops on my team working past 9 in the evening - we had two deadlines for Friday night and all of us worked our assess off for a month. I stopped them working because I know that it is unsustainable, I rather keep everyone reasonably rested and meet the deadline ON the deadline rather than earlier, and not ask them to give more and more on something else. What’s not a deadline does not need to be done before the deadline to squeeze more profit from doing other work, essentially because no more profit will actually be squeezed. Of course salespeople and anyone working on the clock CAN squeeze out more, but if a client is expecting something Friday night they will get it Friday night. Quality over quantity any time, a lot of mediocre stuff or crap never ever outweighs good stuff. Clients can always tell quality and care and will remark on it where it matters (ie one’s superiors).

On topic, I think people need to judge the setting and act appropriately, but as others have said, a lot of topics are a minefield these days so I keep my mouth reasonably sanitary