Any Exotic Pet Owners Here?

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Chasing Embers

Captain of the Black Frigate
Nov 12, 2014
44,917
117,179
But other than look at them, what the hell can you do with one?! ?
It's like keeping fish, maintaining a small environment is just relaxing.

So how big do those Goliath Bird Eaters really get?
Leg span close to 12 inches, fangs around 1 inch, the belly is just smaller than a racket ball, and the legs are about as big around as a number 2 pencil.
 

BarrelProof

Lifer
Mar 29, 2020
2,701
10,600
39
The Last Frontier
I like the idea of keeping those tarantulas in those glass aquarium things. Man, we get some spiders in the house and I swear they can dodge a stomping foot like I’ve never seen. I imagine cornering them in an aquarium makes the stomping part of the relationship a much easier task...
 

sumusfumus

Part of the Furniture Now
Jul 20, 2017
597
549
New York City
At one time, "exotic" animals could be sold, bought, and kept, in New York City. This was back in the late-1950's into the early '60s...then the laws changed. When I was still in grade-school, I resolutely decided I just had to have a pet monkey. No ifs, ands, or buts. I had all the details planned out. The monkey would live in my boring bedroom, in a giant cage, I'd feed the thing bananas, teach the monkey tricks, and that obedient monkey would go with me, to school, and sit on my shoulder while I learned my readin' writin' and 'rithmetic lessons. Yes, you read right. I was gonna bring a monkey into a NYC school.... and I would be , of course, the talk of the schoolyard. I'd be the only kid with a monkey on his back! That was the master plan.

So, I announced my monkey plans to my parents and told them that I was buying a monkey. I told them that I had saved enough money to buy the creature, but they'd have to put up the money for the expensive cage. My father was usually a pretty calm guy, but it was my mother, who was far more volatile, and quick to react. So I kept my distance when I made my demands. Pop's eyebrows raised, and quickly told me "NO"!...and suggested that I have my head examined. Dear Mom, may she RIP, told me under no circumstances, no way, no how, would a disgusting, filthy, monkey come into her house, and that if I persisted to give them orders, to tell THEM what I wanted, she'd pull out my hair by the roots, and put me in a coffin!

The monkey lived in my dark basement, in the cage that Mom and Dad paid for. After 6 month's worth of my sulking, crying, promising to keep the cage clean....the monkey got bought, by me, with the money I saved up. While I was in school, dear Mom was the one who fed the monkey, cleaned the cage, and put up with the stink of rotting food, and monkey scat. The monkey never got trained to sit on my shoulder. The monkey never went to school. Squirrel Monkeys are social creatures, and should be in trees with other kindred monkeys. Monkeys also can be quite filthy, and they will throw uneaten food all over the place....and also amuse themselves, sexually, when bored. Just like humans. I finished learning about the birds and bees from that simian degenerate.

After a while, I got tired of the poor monkey, put an add in the paper, and sold the monkey... cage and all.... to some other dumb-ass kid. From my room window, I watched as the disgusted father and happy kid drove away in their green De Soto, and was thankful that someone was even more idiotic than I was. But I was still a kid and regrets were few. I forgot all about my wanker monkey. But.... in the back of my mind, I knew I grew up a little by this unplanned for, experience....an experience that didn't have a romantic, happy ending. I lost some childish innocence.

A few years later, after watching a movie called, "Born Free", I tearfully and wistfully realized that the poor monkey should've never been captured and sold for human pleasure, for amusement, to subject it to a forced life of human domination. It's a terrible thing, to consign God's creatures to a wasted life of confinement, or, to be ritually harvested, or worse, vainly slaughtered, for no good reasons.
 
Last edited:
May 2, 2020
4,664
23,784
Louisiana
At one time, "exotic" animals could be sold, bought, and kept, in New York City. This was back in the late-1950's into the early '60s...then the laws changed. When I was still in grade-school, I resolutely decided I just had to have a pet monkey. No ifs, ands, or buts. I had all the details planned out. The monkey would live in my boring bedroom, in a giant cage, I'd feed the thing bananas, teach the monkey tricks, and that obedient monkey would go with me, to school, and sit on my shoulder while I learned my readin' writin' and 'rithmetic lessons. Yes, you read right. I was gonna bring a monkey into a NYC school.... and I would be , of course, the talk of the schoolyard. I'd be the only kid with a monkey on his back! That was the master plan.

So, I announced my monkey plans to my parents and told them that I was buying a monkey. I told them that I had saved enough money to buy the creature, but they'd have to put up the money for the expensive cage. My father was usually a pretty calm guy, but it was my mother, who was far more volatile, and quick to react. So I kept my distance when I made my demands. Pop's eyebrows raised, and quickly told me "NO"!...and suggested that I have my head examined. Dear Mom, may she RIP, told me under no circumstances, no way, no how, would a disgusting, filthy, monkey come into her house, and that if I persisted to give them orders, to tell THEM what I wanted, she'd pull out my hair by the roots, and put me in a coffin!

The monkey lived in my dark basement, in the cage that Mom and Dad paid for. After 6 month's worth of my sulking, crying, promising to keep the cage clean....the monkey got bought, by me, with the money I saved up. While I was in school, dear Mom was the one who fed the monkey, cleaned the cage, and put up with the stink of rotting food, and monkey scat. The monkey never got trained to sit on my shoulder. The monkey never went to school. Squirrel Monkeys are social creatures, and should be in trees with other kindred monkeys. Monkeys also can be quite filthy, and they will throw uneaten food all over the place....and also amuse themselves, sexually, when bored. Just like humans. I finished learning about the birds and bees from that simian degenerate.

After a while, I got tired of the poor monkey, put an add in the paper, and sold the monkey... cage and all.... to some other dumb-ass kid. From my room window, I watched as the disgusted father and happy kid drove away in their green De Soto, and was thankful that someone was even more idiotic than I was. But I was still a kid and regrets were few. I forgot all about my wanker monkey. But.... in the back of my mind, I knew I grew up a little by this unplanned for, experience....an experience that didn't have a romantic, happy ending. I lost some childish innocence.

A few years later, after watching a movie called, "Born Free", I tearfully and wistfully realized that the poor monkey should've never been captured and sold for human pleasure, for amusement, to subject it to a forced life of human domination. It's a terrible thing, to consign God's creatures to a wasted life of confinement, or, to be ritually harvested, or worse, vainly slaughtered, for no good reasons.
Ain’t no way in hell I’d have a monkey! Or a chimp. I’ve seen them things throw their own shit at people! I was at the zoo and this one tried to come in high and tight on someone with a turd fastball. Nope. I had a good friend in college from India. He said the monkeys will come into your house over there if you leave a window open, and wreck the whole place while you’re gone.
 

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Lifer
Apr 28, 2019
1,876
5,084
At one time, "exotic" animals could be sold, bought, and kept, in New York City.

Back in grade school I knew a kid who had a squirrel monkey. I was absolutely fascinated and thought it was the coolest pet ever but the kid was bored and irritated with it and made it sound like it was a big pain in the neck.
 

sumusfumus

Part of the Furniture Now
Jul 20, 2017
597
549
New York City
As a kid I had a couple of pet squirrels. Not exactly exotic, but unusual I guess. They were knocked out of a tree by a storm as babies, and we raised them until they were grown and turned them loose. Most “exotic” pet I’ve ever had. ?‍♂️
I once rescued two baby squirrels that some schoolboys were about to mistreat. I'm not sure why, but I think they might have fallen out of the nest, and mamma was probably frightened away by the young boys.

I fed those squirrels, every two hours with baby formula mixed with ground walnuts, kept them warm, and tried to be a good sub for their mom, but I ultimately failed after two months, of hoping, and worrying.
 

mso489

Lifer
Feb 21, 2013
41,210
60,610
The only eight legged creature I have ever had was a quite large garden spider that took up residence in a one-room and bath apartment I had right out of the Navy. I was too transitory to have a domestic animal, so I considered her my companion animal. We respected each other, and I believe she was still there when I left after about a year. I had acquaintances who purchased a wolf, and after a few months came to understand what not-domesticated meant and found a suitable wildlife home for it. Anyone adopting a parrot species must understand their longevity, which average out longer than human life expectancy. Like, the bird goes in your will and needs godparents at the outset.
 

SoddenJack

Can't Leave
Apr 19, 2020
431
1,286
West Texas
When I was in my teens and 20s I had had lots of arachnids and reptiles. Got bit by a Skeleton Tarantual (E. murinus) and an Ornamental Baboon (H. maculata). Feels like jamming shapened pencils in your finger. Had a “Deathstalker” (quinquestriatus) scorpion at one point

Had a few venemous snakes too (Gold Eyelash Viper, Rhinocerous Viper, and a Dusky Pigmy Rattlesnake). The wife hates snakes and is afraid of spiders, so no more for me. We have 2 young children so I wouldn’t risk keeping any of the dangerous/venemous stuff anymore. Just a Leopard Gecko my son has in his room.
 
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