A Pipe Smokers Story by PM.Com Members 12/22/2019

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rogers

Part of the Furniture Now
Mar 9, 2012
738
2,079
"Why? Because he won't tell me what's in Captain Black Grape that makes it the grapest, that's why!"

With the Highway Patrol in hot pursuit .....
 

jaytex1969

Lifer
Jun 6, 2017
9,517
50,591
Here
...they hid in the trunk with Ashdigger. The cops stopped and looked in the passenger compartment and continued down the road.

With three smokers now in the trunk, the air was getting thick.

I'm outta here." said Ash. "I gotta finish my report on that burning retail establishment."

Billy Gibbons excused himself, as well, muttering something about "crazy ass forum people" and wandered down the shoulder with his thumb out. Of course, it wasn't long before a '34 Ford coupe full of hot, young chicks scooped up the grizzled crooner and departed in a cloud of burning rubber.

Left to his own devices, Jim pondered his next move. Just as he was feeling out of ideas, he spied a......


13377
 

peregrinus

Lifer
Aug 4, 2019
1,205
3,787
Pacific Northwest
a beat-up brown Piggly Wiggly paper bag on the shoulder of the highway.
Curiosity got the better of him and he cautiously opened the crumpled and grease stained bag. Inside he found an unopened tin of 1992 McClelland’s Christmas Cheer, a pre-transition Barling silver military mount cutty shape meerschaum pipe, a box of Swan Vesta’s and a...
 
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rogers

Part of the Furniture Now
Mar 9, 2012
738
2,079
...only find some helium. Wait a minute." Jim remembered the helium tank n the trunk of Billy's car. Why it was there, who knows?
Jim began filling the condom with helium. It grew large. Really large. Really really really large. The size of a really really really large beach ball.
Jim tied the open end of the condom with shoestring, picked up Bastion, released the condom from the tank, and up they went. Up, up and away. A gentle breeze carried them for miles until ....
 

tokerpipes

Lifer
Jan 16, 2012
2,042
690
45
Eatonville, WA
A flock of seagulls (not the band) flew by. Bastion got all excited and barked at the birds as dogs do. The excessive movement put a small pin hole leak in the makeshift balloon sending the pair slowly back to the earth. Upon landing in what seemed to be a small clearing surrounded by trees.
“Well buddy now I guess we walk. At least we have some bacci and a decent pipe.”
Bastion barked in response to his master.
Suddenly there was some rustling near the edge of the clearing just in front of them...
 

rogers

Part of the Furniture Now
Mar 9, 2012
738
2,079
"Who dat?!", Jim shouted in a desperate attempt to save this thread.
Suddenly, bursting forth into the clearing running at top speed was a little man wearing a green blazer and a green top hat, a clay pipe clenched in his teeth and a box of cereal clutched at his breast.
"Out of me way!", exclaimed the little man. "They're after me Lucky Charms!"
 
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