A Pipe Smokers Story by PM.Com Members 12/22/2019

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tokerpipes

Lifer
Jan 16, 2012
2,042
690
45
Eatonville, WA
Billy Gibbons, lead singer for ZZ Fucking Top, smoking an Al Pacia church warden. He turned the radio down (freaking opera music). He said , “is that mixture 79? “
Jim shook his head loosely awe struck.
“Got any more, I just ran out?” explained Billy.
Jim rumaged through his overalls and found the rest of the bag he had just bought.
“Thanks brother, need a ride?” Billy asked...
 

brian64

Lifer
Jan 31, 2011
9,603
14,668
Please excuse the momentary interruption...this is all quite fascinating...but just for the sake of clarity, as I attempt to follow all of this:

Why was he riding a 10 speed?

What in the hell are "Can’t Bust Ums"?

Immediately after suffering severe facial trauma he buys a cob?

Were either the B&M clerk or Billy Gibbons concerned about the condition of his face?

What happened to the Rouxgaroux?
 
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B.Fee

Lifer
Nov 28, 2019
1,018
7,717
Honolulu / Colorado
Please excuse the momentary interruption...this is all quite fascinating...but just for the sake of clarity, as I attempt to follow all of this:

Why was he riding a 10 speed?

What in the hell are "Can’t Bust Ums"?

Immediately after suffering severe facial trauma he buys a cob?

Were either the B&M clerk or Billy Gibbons concerned about the condition of his face?

What happened to the Rouxgaroux?
And what about Naomi?
 

seanv

Lifer
Mar 22, 2018
2,958
10,405
Canada
Billy Gibbons, lead singer for ZZ Fucking Top, smoking an Al Pacia church warden. He turned the radio down (freaking opera music). He said , “is that mixture 79? “
Jim shook his head loosely awe struck.
“Got any more, I just ran out?” explained Billy.
Jim rumaged through his overalls and found the rest of the bag he had just bought.
“Thanks brother, need a ride?” Billy asked...
Od course I do jim replied.
Where are we headed Billy asked....
 
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timt

Lifer
Jul 19, 2018
2,844
22,729
"If it's alright with you, I'd like to head over to Walmart for a new Zippo, ten speed and some fresh duds, these are toast." But before Billy could answer, Jim saw something out of the corner of his one good eye. "Is that what I think it is? Is that really a .....?"
 
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rogers

Part of the Furniture Now
Mar 9, 2012
738
2,079
and Jim thought to himself, "Man, I really need to lay off that strong ass coffee, crap's got me seeing things."

"Ruff ruff!"

"Wait, don't shoot! That's my dog, Bastion!"

"Bastard?"

"No, Bastion! What's the matter, rock music makes you deaf?"

"What?"

"Never mind! How 'bout that ride to Walmart?"

Jim, Bastion and Billy .....
 

seanv

Lifer
Mar 22, 2018
2,958
10,405
Canada
and Jim thought to himself, "Man, I really need to lay off that strong ass coffee, crap's got me seeing things."

"Ruff ruff!"

"Wait, don't shoot! That's my dog, Bastion!"

"Bastard?"

"No, Bastion! What's the matter, rock music makes you deaf?"

"What?"

"Never mind! How 'bout that ride to Walmart?"

Jim, Bastion and Billy .....
Arrive at Walmart and see the fire dept has the area taped off. Someone set the local Walmart on fire. They turn the car and see....
 
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jaytex1969

Lifer
Jun 6, 2017
9,517
50,591
Here
...a man in a Pipes Magazine t-shirt, covered in soot and accelerant, running from the man and clenching a gourd calabash. "I was only trying to light that damned Gawith flake!", his scream trailed off as he put distance behind him.

Walmart and a Zippo no longer an option, they.....


13224
 
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tokerpipes

Lifer
Jan 16, 2012
2,042
690
45
Eatonville, WA
Sat in the car miffed.

Finally Billy spoke and said, “Ever been to Reno? I got some credit at one of the casinos there we can get you some new duds.”

Jim thinks to himself (well this story couldn’t get much crazier) and said, “sure why not, but can we change the radio station first?”

Billy agreed and put a cd in the player. “Check out this demo me and the boys are working on.”
The little hot rod smoked it’s tires as the three of them put some miles between them and the firestorm that was now the Walmart.
 
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rogers

Part of the Furniture Now
Mar 9, 2012
738
2,079
Moments later, cruising down the highway and smoking the last bit of tobacco...
Errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr..
"Crap, it's the cops," says Billy.
"What? Were you speeding?" asked Jm.
"I don't think so," says Billy as he pulls onto the shoulder and stops, the squad car pulling up behind them.
Billy rolls down the window as the officer approaches.....
 

timt

Lifer
Jul 19, 2018
2,844
22,729
.... Jim hears a loud thumping and yelling from the trunk. WTF thought Jim. Billy floors it and....
 
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tokerpipes

Lifer
Jan 16, 2012
2,042
690
45
Eatonville, WA
The cop pulls his revolver and squeezes off 3 rounds aiming at the tires, missing each time. He scrambles back to the cruiser and the pursuit is on.

“Billy what the hell did you get me involved in?”, screamed Jim.

Bastion started barking and growling at the noise coming from the trunk.
 
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timt

Lifer
Jul 19, 2018
2,844
22,729
Suddenly, Jim's blood ran cold as he remembered something. When Billy first arrived after his bike accident, he got out of the passenger door. So, who the hell was driving the car and where are they now? Jim demanded Billy tell him who was in the trunk. After a bit, Billy confessed, "it's pipesmagazine forum member ashdigger".

Oh shit! No wonder he hasn't been posting lately. He's been with Billy. During the chaos at Walmart, Billy had managed to bind ashdigger and throw him in the trunk. But why???
 
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