Pirates- (of Penzance and elsewhere): Aaaaaarrrrr!

[jpmcwjr]

Where be ye? Tis the day o' talkin' like a pirate! Ye's be asleep!!

 

[elasmo]

Avast maties! bring me my Privateer!

 

[brian64]

What kind of socks do pirates wear?

Aaarrrrgyle.

 

[gerryp]

Soon I'll be havin' a bowl of some of me Black Frigate. I'll have some tea with lime with it. Why the lime, ye ask? To fend off the scurvy, savvy?

Now answer me this: Do ye landlubbers know what a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet be?

Ye'd think it would be R....but it really be the C.

 

[gerryp]

Modern pirate: "Hey mon, let's all grab a few rifles, pile into rowboats, and attack a U.S. Navy Cruiser."

 

[mso489]

Aye, ye matey, step lively there to talk like pirates, arrrggg. Ahoy there, who put rum in my tobackey?

 

[lawdawg]

With Dunhill Navy Rolls and letters of marque and reprisal issued by Her Majesty, the crew of the Royal Yacht will blast you scallywags out of the seven seas! puf

 

[elessar]

Me father was King Neptune, me mother was a mermaid. I was born on de crest of a wave and rocked in de cradle of de deep. My eyes is stars, me teeth is spars, me hair is hemp and seaweed; and when I spits, I spits tar. I's tough, I is, I am, I are...

 

[bnichols23]

Myyyyy father was the keeper of the Eddystone Light, he slept with a piratess one fine night! From this union there came three; a porpoise, a porgy & the other was...

Chasingemberrrrrrs!

 

[shanez]

This be what pops into my head when I read/hear stuff like this thread:

 

[Waning Embers]

This be what pops into my head when I read/hear stuff like this thread:

So who does live in a pineapple under the sea??

 

[Waning Embers]

As for me, I be chained to labor by a group of cruel task masters. (at work)?

 

[shanez]

So who does live in a pineapple under the sea??

This guy:

 

[mikefu]

How much does a pirate pay for his earrings?




A Buccaneer!!

 

[scloyd]

Why don’t pirates shower before they walk the plank?




Because they’ll wash up on shore later.

 

[elessar]

A pirate walks into a bar with the ships wheel in his pants.
Bartender says, "Hey cap'n you know you've got a wheel in yer pants?!"
Cap'n replies, "Arghhh it's drivin me nuts!!"

 

[peregrinus]

Okay,

Where do pirate captains keep their buccaneers?

Under their buckin' hats.

 

[jaytex1969]

Marooned at a "gala" event where my wife is being recognized for 18 years of servitude. Had to shave and everything....

Jay

 

[jpmcwjr]

Shave his belly with a rusty razor,
Shave his belly with a rusty razor,
Ear-li in the mornin'

Although it probably was your face that got smoothed.

 

[jaytex1969]

Although it probably was your face that got smoothed.

View attachment 2581