Hi everyone,
So here I am, months after my last post.
I used to be really happy to develop this new hobby. As some know, I even made some pipes myself, carved some pipe stands.
Here is why I haven't posted anything recently.
I had given up smoking cigarettes for a good year.
Then one pipe, then another, then I wanted the rush again, then I allowed myself one or two cigarettes when I went out.
Then soon I was smoking a good 17 cigarettes a day, no more taste for pipe smoking.
I felt stupid. and sad.
A sad idiot.
An addict who, because of his addiction, couldn't enjoy fully, at all even, something he actually appreciated quite a lot.
So here I am, cigarette free for a month after a 8 months relapse. I am really happy about that achievement.
Happy but afraid also.
I want to smoke my pipes again, and the tobaccos that I bought and had imported all the way to China where I live.
But man, I really don't want to smoke cigarettes again.
So, sure, one could say "it's all about will power" which would then make me feel weak and stupid and as if it's just a question of will power.
Well, yeah sure, it is a little. But man, it was hard to quit.
Will the pipe give me such strong cravings that I'll end up smoke again?
is it going to be an eternal cycle ?
Here's why I smoked again : the rush! You don't get the rush from pipe smoking. Also, I found it very impractical to smoke the pipe when going out with friends.
you need the tools, the tobacco box, wary of putting tobacco everywhere and wasting it.
Empathetic and compassionate people of this great forum, any advice, pat on the back, past experience, please, I'll take them all.
Thanks for reading me.
Carver.
So here I am, months after my last post.
I used to be really happy to develop this new hobby. As some know, I even made some pipes myself, carved some pipe stands.
Here is why I haven't posted anything recently.
I had given up smoking cigarettes for a good year.
Then one pipe, then another, then I wanted the rush again, then I allowed myself one or two cigarettes when I went out.
Then soon I was smoking a good 17 cigarettes a day, no more taste for pipe smoking.
I felt stupid. and sad.
A sad idiot.
An addict who, because of his addiction, couldn't enjoy fully, at all even, something he actually appreciated quite a lot.
So here I am, cigarette free for a month after a 8 months relapse. I am really happy about that achievement.
Happy but afraid also.
I want to smoke my pipes again, and the tobaccos that I bought and had imported all the way to China where I live.
But man, I really don't want to smoke cigarettes again.
So, sure, one could say "it's all about will power" which would then make me feel weak and stupid and as if it's just a question of will power.
Well, yeah sure, it is a little. But man, it was hard to quit.
Will the pipe give me such strong cravings that I'll end up smoke again?
is it going to be an eternal cycle ?
Here's why I smoked again : the rush! You don't get the rush from pipe smoking. Also, I found it very impractical to smoke the pipe when going out with friends.
you need the tools, the tobacco box, wary of putting tobacco everywhere and wasting it.
Empathetic and compassionate people of this great forum, any advice, pat on the back, past experience, please, I'll take them all.
Thanks for reading me.
Carver.