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A new smokers dilemma. . .

(21 posts)
  • Started 2 years ago by thatvintagechap
  • Latest reply from alexnc
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    thatvintagechap

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    Hello all!

    I've been fascinated by pipe smoking for several months now,and recently ordered my first pipe which is due to arrive any day now. But i have a problem. I live at home with VERY anti-smoking parents; my mum especially is opposed to all kinds & once commented on how much she hates pipes when she saw a chap smoking one on a T.V. show.

    Hiding it would be nearly impossible and isn't really something i'd want to do anyway, my thinking is that if i'm mature enough to make this decision then i should be upfront about it and take it on the chin. . .That's easier said than done however, as i'm incredibly anxious & nervous about telling them mainly due to the inevitable disappointment they'll express. Any advice would be appreciated!

    Also, i'm eighteen years old so legally an adult here so that isn't an issue. I also have never smoked anything else before except for one cigarette, which they don't know about.

    Thanks for reading and happy smoking!

    Posted 2 years ago #
  2. pagan

    pagan

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    i should be upfront about it and take it on the chin.

    Keep that attitude, alot of peoples problems can be resolves better I they would just "man-up" and face it head on. Good for you at a young age to wana take responsibility for your actions

    Your mother will love you no matter what, she may be disappointed at first, believe me she will respect you for being up front about it, it may take time though

    Nowhere in the world will such a brotherly feeling of confidence be experienced as amongst those who sit together smoking their pipes
    Posted 2 years ago #
  3. petertomkins

    petertomkins

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    I'd take it on the chin there bud! I remember telling my parents I was a smoker. It took a while for them to swing around, but honesty is always the best policy. It's not as if it makes you a different person!

    Posted 2 years ago #
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    hextor

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    Yes my friend, you are old enough, it will bother them for a bit and also do they smoke a lot of pipes where you live, i live in Texas and my dad used to smoke a pipe along time ago, he caught me one day smoking from a pipe when i was younger and he was more intrigued than disappointed, in the city i live there are not a lot of pipe smokers, or i have not seen them and it is rare seeing a young man smoking a pipe.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  5. derfatdutchman

    derfatdutchman

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    If your old enough to make the decision you want to smoke, then your old enough to tell your parents.

    "The value of tobacco is best understood when it is the last you possess, and there is no chance of getting more."
    Bismark
    Posted 2 years ago #
  6. thomasmartin

    thomasmartin

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    For heaven's sake LISTEN TO YOUR MOTHER! Starting smoking, even if it's "only" pipe smoking, is a very, very bad idea. I say this as a former cigarette and current pipe smoker. Any other advice I could give a young non-smoker would be a heavy burden on my conscience.

    Thomas
    Posted 2 years ago #
  7. cortezattic

    Cortez

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    This forum is the wrong place to seek an objective and well-reasoned opinion. For obvious reasons, most of the people here will favor what can be variously described as a hobby, pastime, gourmet indulgence, or habituation. I would suggest waiting until you are truly independent of your parents' control and influence.

    I find myself sitting idly on the line dividing past and future,
    as if I could kill time without injuring eternity. -- Thoreau
    Posted 2 years ago #
  8. ahmadothman

    Ahmad Othman

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    Well, I had the same situation.. and I held my grounds against my mum, and it passed.. I just simply smoke in my room now..

    “I believe that pipe smoking contributes to a somewhat calm and objective judgement in all human affairs.” - Albert Einstein
    Posted 2 years ago #
  9. thomasmartin

    thomasmartin

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    What Cortez said is true. If you've made up your mind about the issue I will share with you everything I know to make pipe smoking the most pleasurable experience for you. Until then my advice remains what I stated above.

    Posted 2 years ago #
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    hextor

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    There are two women who you have to go through, your mom, she might be accepting and your girlfriend and if one day you get married there is the wife.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  11. didimauw

    didimauw

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    Yes you are old enough now, dont be afraid. But also ur old enough to get kicked out too. But don't hide it!

    "I don't know half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve."
    Posted 2 years ago #
  12. pipesmokingtom

    pipesmokingtom

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    I'm surprised how often this question gets asked. I'm glad it does, because it's an interesting discussion, but its frequency fascinates me.

    It raises some pretty interesting cultural differences, actually, as there are many places outside the US where living at home well in to one's 20's is the norm. Or even NEVER moving out and inheriting the homestead after a family member's passing.

    EDIT: I'll also add that my strategy, apparently, was to find MANY different ways to disappoint my parents so that by the time the smoking happened, it didn't seem like that big a deal.

    "We have an unspoken, mutual understanding to ignore the things we hate about each other so we can continue to enjoy the things we love about each other."
    Posted 2 years ago #
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    shutterbugg

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    There are two women who you have to go through, your mom, she might be accepting and your girlfriend and if one day you get married there is the wife.

    If the wife and girlfriend are accepting of each other, the pipe probably won't be a dealbreaker.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  14. mso489

    mso489

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    Living with your folks, you need to work with them on something like this. Especially with a beginner, pipe smoking is a fire hazard. Is their objection moral or about health? If they say don't smoke in their house, you have to respect that. You can still smoke away from home, if you can find a place to do that, but it is probably right to let your folks know that you do. Don't try to hinge your own emerging adulthood on this one aspect. They will have to adjust and let go in many ways in the next few years, including when you are able to move out. Remember, these will always be your parents, and you don't want to become estranged, emotionally or otherwise. It's all about working things out, and that is an important part of growing up.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  15. paulie66scandinavian

    Paul

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    Good think you're considern a pipe and not cigarettes as I did at the age of 13- happily both my parents and brothers did smoke those days so then restrictions from their part were fewer,althogheter they did protest some. Still everbody's protesting should I smoke indoors,

    Paul The Scandinavian'
    Posted 2 years ago #
  16. mawnansmiff

    mawnansmiff

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    I think MSO really hit the nail on the head with his response.

    However my advice would be to not start smoking at all...pipe, cigs, cigars nothing! But as an adult you will make your own choices though do be aware that there are consequences to be had in all decisions that you choose to make.

    Regards,

    Jay.

    ...take up thy stethoscope and walk...
    Posted 2 years ago #
  17. alexnc

    alexnc

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    So - my Dad said to me at your age...
    Smoking is such an inefficient way to use tobacco. If I could take that tobacco and purify it (a chemist) and inject all of its chemicals into you in a single shot it would kill you. So smoking it may not be all that bad, just because it's so inefficient I mean. All the poison's still in there of course. But you make your own decisions.

    Goo Goo g’joob
    Posted 2 years ago #
  18. codecreatively

    Code

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    MSO is spot on. You're an adult, but it's their house and their rules. Same as if you were to rent somewhere else with a no smoking policy, or stay at a hotel with the same. If you're headed to Uni, good on you. If you're headed to the workforce, good on you as well. Just be prepared to find some new lodging if your parents are as strict as they sound. It's all a part of growing up and they'll still love you.

    I'm just glad my wife didn't make ME move out when I took up cigars, and then pipes :D. She tolerates pipes much more, the smell goes away much quicker.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  19. zekest

    zekest

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    Technically an adult? Maybe in some states.

    But giving smoking advice to a teen (18year old) sounds like a bad idea.

    Moderators, what say you?

    Posted 2 years ago #
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    anarchisthermit

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    And as long as you live in your parents house, you are under their control to a certain extent. You need to leave thenest to leave the nest.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  21. alexnc

    alexnc

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    agree with Zekest

    Posted 2 years ago #

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