Every time I visit the Briary, I tend to get into an argument with Skip. Not an angry argument, but… more of a debate. I walk in, and hear, “There he is… Cosmic, Cosmo, Michael, the metallurgy artists…” and whatever else he thinks will berate me amicably. He is a good guy. Then usually Skip fills me in on what pipes are new, maybe a new one he has made, or just something new in the pipe world that he hushes me to absolute secrecy about. Keeping the dirty little secrets about who is having their pipes made for them and who sucks at making pipes.
Skip knows my preferences and the pipemakers I think are asshole fakers. Some pipemakers he makes assumptions as to what I feel about them. Todd Johnson, for example, being a running joke between us. He assumes I hate the guy, and I just don’t have any feeling whatsoever towards. But, it is a source of backslapping.
Somehow, we got on a debate between Tinsky pipes and Briarworks pipes. Is it better to come up with an awesome stem design and then have it mass produced as Mark does, or to just make mediocre stems by hand for each and every pipe… referring to the gradation of the draft and the funnel at the button. I’ll let you guys decide for yourselves on that, but this all led to a knew topic, the tenon end of the stem.
So after telling me how hard it is to drill the draft in gradations, and then polishing the insides, drilling out the funnel and blah blah blah… poor, poor pipemakers have it so hard… he then pulls a tenon out of a Tinsky and a Briarwork. With the BW having a funnel drilled into the end of the tenon that goes into the stummel, and the Tinsky having no funnel at the tenon, just flush flat at the draft. Skip is all, “this little detail was left off of the Tinsky…”
Me, “But, five minutes ago, you told me that it was best to have the draft hole be flush with no places to cause turbulence to increase condensation within the draft?”
Skip, “It is, but it is a detail that is used by all of the top end pipemakers, so they have to know what they are doing.”
Me, “OK, well lets check. Would you say that Beckers are top end smokers with all of the best details?” I was baiting him, because I knew that NONE of my Beckers had that stupid little funnel at the tenon. So, we check all of the Beckers, and not a one had a funnel.
“What about Castello? Does he know what he is doing? Former?” We checked and low and behold all of what Skip would argue are top end best smokers were all flash at the tenon. Skip then pulls out a few expensive pipes that aren’t necessarily “best smokers.” And, all of them had funnels drilled into the tenon. It felt good to get Skip against the ropes and beat on him a bit. He has been a pipemaker and pipeshop owner since ’72, so I figured soon enough; I would take a few punches on this. Luck must have just been on my side. Maybe I am completely wrong, but I had “called it” in the first round.
So, the argument is that the goal of the “best” draft hole is to have no wide spots where turbulence can occur to increase the chance of increased condensation. Fig A & B
But, if you drill a funnel at the tenon end, you get an open space. Fig C
Skip, “But, sometimes the tenon is not deep enough to reach the bottom of the tenon.”
Me, “that is a sign of an even WORSE pipemaker, in my opinion. If the pipemaker can’t make this meet up, then they suck on multiple levels.” Fig D
...or, if the draft in the stummel is too wide Fig E
Wham, Pow, he rolls his head… he slides down the ropes…. he goes down… 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7…
Now, I have pipes with these stupid little funnels drilled in the ends, but my best pipes don’t. I don’t notice all of the funnel drilled pipes gurgling like mad, and in fact some are some of my favorite smokers. But, these do tend to have some moisture that makes it’s way down the draft. The argument was merely the natural divergence that started with what makes the best stems.
Skip crawls back up the ropes and adds one last attempt… “well, the flat bottomed tenons collect gunk.”
Me, “why would they collect gunk if they are pushed flush against the back of the mortice?”
Me, “And, if so, then the gunk on the funnel drilled tenons collects inside the stem… right?”
Skip, graciously throws in the towel.
What do you think? Why in the hell would a pipemaker think that drilling a funnel into the back of the tenon is a sign of a well drilled pipe? Bring it on!! Ha ha puf
Skip knows my preferences and the pipemakers I think are asshole fakers. Some pipemakers he makes assumptions as to what I feel about them. Todd Johnson, for example, being a running joke between us. He assumes I hate the guy, and I just don’t have any feeling whatsoever towards. But, it is a source of backslapping.
Somehow, we got on a debate between Tinsky pipes and Briarworks pipes. Is it better to come up with an awesome stem design and then have it mass produced as Mark does, or to just make mediocre stems by hand for each and every pipe… referring to the gradation of the draft and the funnel at the button. I’ll let you guys decide for yourselves on that, but this all led to a knew topic, the tenon end of the stem.
So after telling me how hard it is to drill the draft in gradations, and then polishing the insides, drilling out the funnel and blah blah blah… poor, poor pipemakers have it so hard… he then pulls a tenon out of a Tinsky and a Briarwork. With the BW having a funnel drilled into the end of the tenon that goes into the stummel, and the Tinsky having no funnel at the tenon, just flush flat at the draft. Skip is all, “this little detail was left off of the Tinsky…”
Me, “But, five minutes ago, you told me that it was best to have the draft hole be flush with no places to cause turbulence to increase condensation within the draft?”
Skip, “It is, but it is a detail that is used by all of the top end pipemakers, so they have to know what they are doing.”
Me, “OK, well lets check. Would you say that Beckers are top end smokers with all of the best details?” I was baiting him, because I knew that NONE of my Beckers had that stupid little funnel at the tenon. So, we check all of the Beckers, and not a one had a funnel.
“What about Castello? Does he know what he is doing? Former?” We checked and low and behold all of what Skip would argue are top end best smokers were all flash at the tenon. Skip then pulls out a few expensive pipes that aren’t necessarily “best smokers.” And, all of them had funnels drilled into the tenon. It felt good to get Skip against the ropes and beat on him a bit. He has been a pipemaker and pipeshop owner since ’72, so I figured soon enough; I would take a few punches on this. Luck must have just been on my side. Maybe I am completely wrong, but I had “called it” in the first round.
So, the argument is that the goal of the “best” draft hole is to have no wide spots where turbulence can occur to increase the chance of increased condensation. Fig A & B
But, if you drill a funnel at the tenon end, you get an open space. Fig C
Skip, “But, sometimes the tenon is not deep enough to reach the bottom of the tenon.”
Me, “that is a sign of an even WORSE pipemaker, in my opinion. If the pipemaker can’t make this meet up, then they suck on multiple levels.” Fig D
...or, if the draft in the stummel is too wide Fig E
Wham, Pow, he rolls his head… he slides down the ropes…. he goes down… 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7…
Now, I have pipes with these stupid little funnels drilled in the ends, but my best pipes don’t. I don’t notice all of the funnel drilled pipes gurgling like mad, and in fact some are some of my favorite smokers. But, these do tend to have some moisture that makes it’s way down the draft. The argument was merely the natural divergence that started with what makes the best stems.
Skip crawls back up the ropes and adds one last attempt… “well, the flat bottomed tenons collect gunk.”
Me, “why would they collect gunk if they are pushed flush against the back of the mortice?”
Me, “And, if so, then the gunk on the funnel drilled tenons collects inside the stem… right?”
Skip, graciously throws in the towel.
What do you think? Why in the hell would a pipemaker think that drilling a funnel into the back of the tenon is a sign of a well drilled pipe? Bring it on!! Ha ha puf
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