She Wet My Pipe

[johnnyreb]

Cosmic, seriously, maybe you're on to something here! Savinelli has their culinary line of flavored pipes with the Meile Honey Dipper, Vaniglia Vanilla extract, and Chocolate pipes. Maybe you could work with them to develop a hint of the nuance of Lemon Joy flavor and room note?

 

[huntertrw]

johnnyreb:
Cosmic Lemon! I like it!

 

[johnnyreb]

"Cosmic Lemon! I like it!"
I like that also! That's fresh sounding. This thread has the makings to be epic.
Looking forward to the bubbles jokes. I knew a girl named Bubbles once.

 

[cosmicfolklore]

Hmmm, lemony? I've tried orange tobacco, but not lemon. Have you even gotten a little dishwashing detergent in your mouth? Gag. But, I could see it being marketed to cut the ash and tars... and leave you with a fresh breath, ha ha, gag. 8O

 

[minfarshaw]

I love the name of the thread by th way. It caught my attention. Lol.

 

[johnnyreb]

Just like Orley did, I see a reason for a screen name change here...Cosmic Lemon! Where's a Mod when you really need one? Let's getter done!

 

[elduderino]

Okay here's the joke.
There were a few ducks in the park blowing bubbles, and a police officer gave them a ticket. They went to court and the first duck went in to see the judge. The judge asks, "What is ur name and why are you here?" The duck said, "My name is quack and I'm here for blowing bubbles in a park." The judge said, "That's not a crime, ur free to leave. please send the next duck in." So the next duck comes in and the judge asks, "What is ur name and why are you here?" The duck says "My name is quack quack quack and I'm here for blowing bubbles in the park." The judge replied, "That's not a crime ur free to go. Please send the next duck in." So the third duck comes in and the judge says, "Let me guess ur name is quack quack quack and ur here for blowing bubbles in the park?" The duck says "No, my name is Bubbles."

 

[cosmicfolklore]

Eh, the pipe would have to be really, really worse than I expect to find me blowing bubbles, ha ha.

 

[instymp]

Sounds better than what my mother in-law did to my father in-laws pipes many moons ago, she thought they smelled bad so she cleaned them for him, freshened & sterilized them with bleach.

 

[cosmicfolklore]

Yikes! Yeh, no telling what all would have been done to them of I had not stopped the endeavor.

 

[cobguy]

Hilarious story ... it's the thought that counts, right? :rofl:

 

[johnnyreb]

Cosmic,
Smoked any lemon flavored aromatics lately? How are the bubble pipes coming along? Did they dry out okay? Any soap ghosts?

 

[cosmicfolklore]

Yesterday, I smoked the Nordhalla 204, and today the 203. I haven't smoked the 501 yet, but so far I haven't tasted anything unusual from the cleaning. They all are sparkly and clean, ha ha. However, I don't recommend the practice on principal, but no harm, no foul. Ha ha.

 

[johnnyreb]

Good! I guess there's no need to call Lakeland for advice then!

 

[foggymountain]

Not to be sexist, but women are good at messing up pipes. Leave the stems in or they might not go in later. A while back I had a maid at my place. She spoke English. I told her very carefully, not to touch the pipes. Went in the next room for a snooze and was wakened by a light popping sound. She was dusting the Peterson meerschaums and dropping each one on the desk afterwards. (I have a rack of the 7 Sherlock Holmes). Reading this I am grateful she didn't throw them in soapy water and use Brillo to get the brown stains out. That was her last day working for me.

 

[warren]

It's really a matter that the person doesn't smoke a pipe, ergo they do not know the correct manner of handling. Most men have no more of an idea of the proper handling of a pipe either. You have to see the problem coming and provide the proper instruction. My instruction regarding pipe was: Only I handle my pipes! Her instruction to me was: "Then keep them where they belong." She didn't and I, for the most part, did.
This is akin to a person not knowing that a cowboy hat should rest on its top, not on the brim, if you wish to keep the shape. My wife had to be taught that metal tools used in a damp environment need a coating of oil now and then, while the wooden handles get a bit of linseed oil. Neither her father nor any other man in the family ever thought to teach her or her mother how to treat tools so they would last. No-one ever suggested to either that a shovel needs to feel the touch of a file now and then.
Of course, after I taught her, I was forever putting an edge on her hoes and spades. Garden tools were always piled on my bench when winter came for rust removal, sharpening and oiling. She could do it, of course, but this was just of those "man jobs."
She never messed with my pipes other than to clean the area they resided in and they were always handled carefully. Bless he heart!

 

[bphilli75]

Best thread ever. EVER! Thanks for the much needed laugh. This is one of those stories that will have me randomly cracking up when I think about it over the next few days. I hope all goes well with your pipes. Whew! Great story. :D

 

[cosmicfolklore]

I'm afraid that if I say the words "don't ever touch my pipe" out loud that they may work... too well, and I'll be forever left with only touching my own pipes in a greater sense.
I like it that she appreciates my pipes. She knows them by name and maker. I feel pretty lucky with that. Seeing her enviously eying or handling my big Northern Briars or gently caressing my Becker. I'll not lay any ultimatums out that I might regret. She knows not to clean them now, and I won't guilt trip her. Maybe, one day she'll fold and stuff a flake for me while driving or rub one out for me. I kind of like how she handles my pipe. ::

 

[warren]

"Rub one out!" Very interesting turn of a phrase. Very interesting!

 

[edgreen]

Just remember to use these. "safe" pipe