I went through a rough divorce 14 years ago. She developed a schizophrenia while carrying our second daughter, and just went wacko. Every day was some made up monster or scenario. She first signed custody over to me, because she realized that she was sick, but then she tried to run off with the girls. The police soon figured out that she was the biggest danger and brought the girls back, and then the courtroom battle began. Taped phone calls, and every dirty trick in the books was played on her part. After a two year battle with her, the courts, and the doctors, the moment I signed the final paperwork, I caught pneumonia, and spent three months drowning in my own lungs. I feel for you. Divorce is not easy. Anyone who says it is, just has no clue.
I have had my daughters on my own all of this time, and my oldest is getting ready to leave the nest. It's always one thing after another.
My advise to anyone facing divorce is just never get angry, ever, keep your temper, be the nice guy, and the powers that govern this whole enchilada will work out what is best for everyone. If you are getting a divorce, the time for convincing her of anything is over. No use in talking arguing about anything with her. Don't waste your time. Time to talk to the judge. Like any fight, the one who looses their temper looses the fight. Many a time I just stood puppy dog eyed in front of the court or the police while my wife screamed about what horrible monster I was with lie after lie, and it all worked out. If you think about it, if you were a judge or an officer of the law, would you believe the person who is angry, or the person who being calm and rational?
I always hate to hear someone is going though this. Good luck.