Telling my Parents I Started Smoking

[warren]

Second, if you have ask the opinion of internet forum members whom you've never met on how to interact with your parents... you might not be mature enough to smoke a pipe. If that is the case, disregard my first statement.

Wished I had made that observation. I wonder at what age these days kids finally cut the umbilical cord. They should do it when they know all the answers but, not all of the questions.

I still have the feeling that the OP is toying with us. Still, the thread is very entertaining and educational. Educational in the sense of how people's various thought processes work.

 

[scloyd]

I still have the feeling that the OP is toying with us.

This was my first thought.

 

[anotherbob]

I think the two options are ignore it. Keep it secret or just say it is what I do and I know you're opinions on it already. So let's agree to disagree.

 

[anotherbob]

This was my first thought.

I don't. Also he or she might want to look up medical statistics about pipe smoking to illustrate how little of a risk they're taking.

 

[Doctor Chopper]

Tell them


Tell them if they don't like your pipesmoking then you'll buy a motorcycle instead.


"Personally" I didn't take up pipesmoking until I hit 30, and I wouldn't recommend ingesting Nicotine before the age of 25 (the male body isn't 100% developed until 25).
But that's just me.

What if you do both? What should you tell your wife - parents? Asking for a friend you know.

 

[anotherbob]

What if you do both? What should you tell your wife - parents? Asking for a friend you know.

Or tell them it's the only thing that keeps you off the herion. That might be the ticket.

 

[Icepiper]

If you want to go into your parental discussion with some ammo...

Pipe tobacco is not, in most cases, and should not be inhaled, so your not harming your lungs.
You have shown no interest in drugs before, they should trust you to continue that.
You've already shown that you know how to take care of your body through your actions, ask them to continue to trust that.

Most importantly, pipe smoking builds character. Tell them you've already proven you know how to take care of your body, now you're working on building your character, they can ask your Grandfather if they need that validated!

And bring a list of all the great people who were pipe smokers... with Albert right at the top!

Thanks for that, I appreciate it

 

[Icepiper]

Exactly! Very entertaining to read other peoples approaches and their story..!

I still have the feeling that the OP is toying with us. Still, the thread is very entertaining and educational. Educational in the sense of how people's various thought processes work.

 

[Icepiper]

I would say two things...

First, you're a grown man, do what you please.

Second, if you have ask the opinion of internet forum members whom you've never met on how to interact with your parents... you might not be mature enough to smoke a pipe. If that is the case, disregard my first statement.

Funny you should mention that. Not that it matters to you, but I find it very entertaining to read comments like these...

 

[Coreios]

Not wanting your kid to smoke isn't being strict. Listen to them until you're paying your own way.

 

[johnscs]

Don't introduce them to this idea by lighting up. In some pleasant, relaxed situation, I would off-handedly mention that you are trying out a pipe to smoke now and then. You're an adult, so do not approach this like you are asking their permission. You are just sharing a minor fact of your life.

If they are negative, slightly, or completely horrified, give them much more time, and mention it again in months or a year from now. If they are only mildly disapproving, let it drop, but mention it again in some weeks. I'd give them plenty of time to adjust, and then eventually, if they are accepting, you could announce that you are stepping outside their place to smoke your pipe, and then come right back and continue with regular family activities.

Be respectful, be polite, be affectionate as possible, and see what happens. If they are totally rejecting on an ongoing basis, then just don't smoke around them or mention it much in the future. Maintain other things you enjoy having in common with them. You'll always need your parents in an emotional way, and they will always need you, so leave room for that. Your parents and your children are a life-long thing, as is family in general. Work with it as best as possible. There will always be points of irritation; hey, it's a family.

I just want to say what a bunch of gentlemen this hobby seems to attract. I feel like many other forums would be telling him “your parents don’t own you”. Also the amount of people emphasizing honesty and respect is really heartwarming.

I’ve had a lot of hobbies my parents haven’t always approved up, but as I kept climbing in my career and grew a family they slowly realized they weren’t the impediments they presumed they be.

I started a pipe in 2009 at age 22, but quit cause my apartment didn’t allow it, at that time my mom and family strongly disapproved. When I started again in 2020 my life situation was vastly different and my mom had stopped caring.

" ... what a bunch of gentlemen this hobby seems to attract ... the number of people emphasizing honesty and respect is really heartwarming" — I completely agree and want to compliment the forum on such polite, even-handed conversation. (It would be so tempting to cave in to patronizing, paternalistic advice on a sensitive topic like this.)

I can't possibly add anything new or interesting to this thread because everybody has already given Icepiper such solid, level-headed input to think about. In the past couple of years, though, I've been asked the same question by beginners who hesitate about how to reveal their decision to smoke a pipe to parents, family members, and friends.

The dilemma always brings back some of the inner turmoil that I went through in my late teens. As a kid and pre-teen, I knew I wanted to try a pipe because I could tell how deeply my grandpa enjoyed his pipes and tobaccos. I was drawn to the fact that you could enjoy the hobby without inhaling. Like Icepiper, I got an early start (I was actually about 15 when I first tried and 16 when I learned to like it). I felt guilty about smoking my pipe in secret and wanted very badly to be open and honest about it.

When the news broke during my freshman year of college, I had to explain myself without sufficient preparation because my brother accidentally found one of my pipes. I told my mom I'd been wanting to tell her about it, even though she would probably be surprised and might not like the idea. I knew smoking tobacco wasn't the best thing, but I was (barely) over 18, living on my own, and had the right to use tobacco legally. I pointed out that pipes were a hobby and not a habit for me. I also said I didn't expect approval — just acceptance that I had made an adult decision. She was initially surprised, but she respected my honesty, didn't disapprove at all, and told me I didn't need to hide it. It wasn't until a few years later that I confessed about smoking a pipe in secret during my high school years. She understood.

 

[warren]

Unless you did a shower. shampoo and a complete change of clothes your mother at least suspected you were enjoying tobacco. Well, unless her sense of smell was abnormal. She simply picked her battles and this was one she knew she couldn't win. Nicotine is a serious competitor.

 

[anotherbob]

I just want to say a lot of times with these parental conflicts there can be no convincing through words. But there can be demonstration through action. Or in other words what I would do in your shoes (well as much as I understand your situation) is smoke let them tell me it's bad and all that. And just keep smoking until they see it's not the thing they feared it would be. Also sometimes it can help to remind parents that the only one that can make your mistakes is you and you're the only one that can learn from them too. And if they're right this is probably the safest form of this mistake you could make.

 

[ADKPiper]

I doubt it's worst news that a child might break to them these days.
They might see it as a categorical positive.

 

[tklee]

Entertaining huh? Your purpose of posting this is not asking for advice but all these elderlies comments, advices, are just piece of entertainment to you huh?

 

[admin]

This has run its course. Closed.