So What Turn's You Off About the Physical Construction of a Pipe?

[Misanthrope]

Reverse calabashes that aren’t army mount, because the best time to clean those is right after smoking, when the condensate is watery and easy to wipe off with a paper towel. Otherwise, it turns to viscous gunk and requires more effort to remove later. Al Pascia got it right with the Curvy line, Chacom whiffed it with theirs.

 

[Chasing Embers]

Failure to pass a pipe cleaner, rustication, bulldog and rhodesian shapes, acrylic stems, artificial ivory, most non bent shapes, and stems with white dots.

 

[agnosticpipe]

I'm with the no metal camp. I love silver bands or minor trim, but metal pipes or partially metal pipes I can't get along with. The stem gaps... that just triggers what little OCD I have! I'll work for hours trying to fix it, but for some reason, I can take looking at a crooked picture on the wall for days before acting on it.

 

[pruss]

Square sides. I just can't, for the life of me, get excited by a panel.

-- Pat

 

[sumusfumus]

Thin shank walls on way too many 9mm filter pipes. High-gloss finish that looks like a coat of cheap, clear nail-polish.

DEAL BREAKER!!!!!

 

[SoddenJack]

They don't look like vaginas, they should all look like vaginas!

Or overtly penis shaped. I guess all pipes are phallic to a degree, but it shuldn’t immediately look like a dong. Sometimes the egg shapes remind me of a uncircumcised penis, that’s why I don’t own any.

 

[Richmond B. Funkenhouser]

No cock and ball pipes.. No heavy pipes.. Not many bent pipes.. Absolutley no filters in my pipes

 

[samuelgawith01]

Thick bowl linings like refractory,or compressed meerschaum powder.
Too much flashy ,ornate metal work.
Careless drilling.

 

[crawdad]

Square sides. I just can't, for the life of me, get excited by a panel.

-- Pat

I'm with you buddy.

 

[olkofri]

Cutty, acorn, Rodhesian shapes; huge chambers; stingers; vulcanite stems; made out of corn cobs; among others.

 

[warren]

If it doesn't fit my eye. If the fit and finish are poorly crafted. If it doesn't fit my fist. If it doesn't smoke well. Etc. Etc.

 

[Jshogan2]

Not passing a cleaner easily, thick bits, gaps between summer and stem...

Stingers. Yuck.

 

[anotherbob]

You all know what I'm gonna say... right?
Do I even have to say it? ...out loud?

I'm not crazy about... oh, come on... you know.

anything that brings joy to others!

 

[PipesRock]

Won't pass a pipe cleaner and stem work. Mainly the button... too big or too small is a sensory turn off.

 

[tschiraldi]

Poor drilling is number one. Also, thick stems, large bits, shorter than 5 1/2", longer than 6", full bents, bowl coatings, filters, stain inside the bowl or stain that runs off on your hand, cobs. But I'm not picky or anything!

 

[stokesdale]

Or overtly penis shaped. I guess all pipes are phallic to a degree, but it shuldn’t immediately look like a dong. Sometimes the egg shapes remind me of a uncircumcised penis, that’s why I don’t own any.

Just imagine what Claudio Cavicchi could do with wood graining if the pipe looked like a vagina...

 

[sumusfumus]

Or overtly penis shaped. I guess all pipes are phallic to a degree, but it shuldn’t immediately look like a dong. Sometimes the egg shapes remind me of a uncircumcised penis, that’s why I don’t own any.

*********************************************************************************
So hysterical laughing.... that I spit out my too-Freudian, smooth-acorn, which, in the right lighting, can sometimes look like the the business end of a big...ahhh, never mind.

 

[edger]

Or overtly penis shaped. I guess all pipes are phallic to a degree, but it shuldn’t immediately look like a dong. Sometimes the egg shapes remind me of a uncircumcised penis, that’s why I don’t own any.

Yeah, circumcised is much more attractive.