PSA Wash Your Hands When Cooking

[Old School 3319]

So my wife had to take all 3 of my kids to the doctor for the school checkup. So being the good guy I am I decided that i would could. So i decided I would make stuffed jalapeno peppers from the garden. So while drinking beer i sliced the peppers and stuffed with cheese. During my beer drinking I needed to pee. Completely forgetting about the peppers i went to use the restroom, got done washed my hands. Back in the kitchen i am so proud about being a good husband when my crotch starts to get warm. Yep HOT peppers on my XXXX. Needless to say a shower was the answer and then back to cooking. so remember to think about where your hands have been before you pee

 

[Richmond B. Funkenhouser]

I've learned this lesson with WD-40 as a kid, and hot wings as a drunk adult.

 

[instymp]

Don't worry, you will only do it once.

 

[mso489]

Then there's the way your urine smells if you eat asparagus.

 

[Richmond B. Funkenhouser]

Then there's the way your urine smells if you eat asparagus.

only a percentage of the population.. some people break down that enzyme and some do not. Whether or not asparagus makes your pee stink is a question of genetics.

 

[Old School 3319]

Don't worry, you will only do it once.

very true

 

[alaskanpiper]

Ive heard one of the cures for “jalapeno hands” is peeing on your hands. Not sure how you could pee on your own XXXX though. That would take some serious.....uh......garden hosing...

 

[brian64]

Ive heard one of the cures for “jalapeno hands” is peeing on your hands.

I'm often amazed at the things one can learn on this forum.

 

[prairiedruid]

Could always stick your XXXX in yogurt. Stops the burn, moisturizes your skin at the same time. Do not return yogurt container to the fridge when done.

 

[Country Bladesmith]

Crawfish. If you ever eat spicy crawfish (which is usually accompanied with many cans/bottles of beer) and have to go pee, you’d better wash your hands before you pee.

 

[LOREN]

Then there's the way your urine smells if you eat asparagus.

I saw a scene in a movie between a girlfriend and boyfriend with asparagus as the subject. ?

 

[kola]

Lol@ the yogurt weenie dip. Hey desperate times call for desperate measures. Just explain that one to the wife.

 

[Mr.Mike]

This happened to a guy I used to work with when I used to cook for a living. Except he took a shit. He went home early.

 

[Kilgore Trout]

Did something similar a few years ago while making a big pot of chili. Sliced up a bunch of jalapenos and after that was slicing up an onion. Well, the onion was doing it's thing and I, unthinkingly, rubbed my eyes.

Big mistake.

 

[scloyd]

So my wife had to take all 3 of my kids to the doctor for the school checkup. So being the good guy I am I decided that i would could. So i decided I would make stuffed jalapeno peppers from the garden. So while drinking beer i sliced the peppers and stuffed with cheese. During my beer drinking I needed to pee. Completely forgetting about the peppers i went to use the restroom, got done washed my hands. Back in the kitchen i am so proud about being a good husband when my crotch starts to get warm. Yep HOT peppers on my XXXX. Needless to say a shower was the answer and then back to cooking. so remember to think about where your hands have been before you pee

What kind of cheese did you use? Velpeeta? Limpurger? Peemento?
Sorry, couldn't stop myself.

 

[ChickenT00th]

Crawfish. If you ever eat spicy crawfish (which is usually accompanied with many cans/bottles of beer) and have to go pee, you’d better wash your hands before you pee.

Extremely important!

 

[jttnk]

For a few I know who are here... Chamois cream before embrocation! And for God’s sake do not pee before washing up.

If you don’t know, look up cycling embrocation.

 

[mortonbriar]

Jalapenos? more like hella-penis!
Thanks for the PSA by the way, this is exactly the kind of predickamint I find myself in all too often.

 

[Country Bladesmith]

For a few I know who are here... Chamois cream before embrocation! And for God’s sake do not pee before washing up.

If you don’t know, look up cycling embrocation.

See, shit like that is why I don’t exercise ?

 

[hawky454]

I thought everyone has experienced this at least once in their lifetime. Shame on you if it’s happened twice or more.