Forgive me all for my dribble, but this is truly cause for great celebration and renewed faith on my part.
I just made the epic journey to the Post Office - with shaking hand I inserted my key, whipped opened my box door and was overcome with the most divine smell I’ve ever smelt in my life, nothing has ever compared to that entirely unexpected first joyous inhalation.
I snatched out the Express Bag & ripped a hole in it like a woman possessed, burying my nose inside as I tore. OMG, euphoria, untold bliss, state of nirvana, I seriously blacked out & went somewhere else for a few seconds, it was better than ..... no, I'd better not go there.
My imported pipe tobacco blends arrived from the only decent retailer in Oz after me spending an eternity on the phone with them yesterday picking their very knowledgeable brains as to what I would and would not like. If these 7 wee bags smoke like they smell, HWMNBO had better hide every credit card within cooeee.
I raced inside & gave each of the staff a smell – hmm, they just don’t get it, except one ‘ol fella who “used to smoke a pipe”, he was beaming with delight his eyebrows hitting the ceiling. Now, the disgusting Borkum Riff can go on the compost heap where it rightfully belongs .... dried blimmen’ cow shite it is.
I'm sat here sipping on "Rasberries & Cream" and it is to die for - NO tongue bite, inhaling deeply for all I'm worth, not a single cough or splutter, just smooth, beautiful aromatic smoke .... now I'm getting somewhere with this smoking caper. No laffin' at the Rasberries & Cream either you boyz - a goil has gotta smoke what a goil fancies and I needs summit sweet like moi. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I got samples of all that stuff you guys like, I'll give it a go last ... like I eat my vegetables.
Yours,
Died & Gone to Heaven
P.S. The owner couldn't believe how much I knew having only been a pipe smoker for a week, as I brought up topics like Latakia, Perique etc - I told him it was all due to the folk at PM and studying their words of wisdom into the wee small hours
I just made the epic journey to the Post Office - with shaking hand I inserted my key, whipped opened my box door and was overcome with the most divine smell I’ve ever smelt in my life, nothing has ever compared to that entirely unexpected first joyous inhalation.
I snatched out the Express Bag & ripped a hole in it like a woman possessed, burying my nose inside as I tore. OMG, euphoria, untold bliss, state of nirvana, I seriously blacked out & went somewhere else for a few seconds, it was better than ..... no, I'd better not go there.
My imported pipe tobacco blends arrived from the only decent retailer in Oz after me spending an eternity on the phone with them yesterday picking their very knowledgeable brains as to what I would and would not like. If these 7 wee bags smoke like they smell, HWMNBO had better hide every credit card within cooeee.
I raced inside & gave each of the staff a smell – hmm, they just don’t get it, except one ‘ol fella who “used to smoke a pipe”, he was beaming with delight his eyebrows hitting the ceiling. Now, the disgusting Borkum Riff can go on the compost heap where it rightfully belongs .... dried blimmen’ cow shite it is.
I'm sat here sipping on "Rasberries & Cream" and it is to die for - NO tongue bite, inhaling deeply for all I'm worth, not a single cough or splutter, just smooth, beautiful aromatic smoke .... now I'm getting somewhere with this smoking caper. No laffin' at the Rasberries & Cream either you boyz - a goil has gotta smoke what a goil fancies and I needs summit sweet like moi. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I got samples of all that stuff you guys like, I'll give it a go last ... like I eat my vegetables.
Yours,
Died & Gone to Heaven
P.S. The owner couldn't believe how much I knew having only been a pipe smoker for a week, as I brought up topics like Latakia, Perique etc - I told him it was all due to the folk at PM and studying their words of wisdom into the wee small hours
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