So, despite the new baby coming, my wife insisted on getting me a new pipe for Christmas. I found out that the pipe was delivered today, and she has been picking on me about the fact that I can't have it yet. These were the memes I sent her over the phone:
I prefaced my multimedia barrage with this:
I tried to be subtle:
When she resisted, I took this route:
Her will was strong, so I went in this direction next: