This is a classic example of "click bait". Both this thread and the article are guilty! But it does make for interesting reading, I guess.
However, buried at the end of the article is this gem: "This study is far from the definitive take on ultra-processed foods and cancer. It cannot say ultra-processed foods are a cause of cancer."
Well, that sort of blows the title out of the water and ends the conversation for now. More research is obviously needed, preferably by scientists who might have a little more insight.
Journalists need to make a living too, I guess. I do feel sorry for all of the people who take stuff like this at face value and go away with the leading message, which is highly misleading. It seems to be the era of misinformation.
However, I don't think it is unreasonable that one day, a link between some ingredients in "ultra processed foods" and cancer is found. Chemical interactions and combinations can do so many strange and interesting things and just because you can make something, it doesn't make it safe. The nutrient values, etc. seem like red herrings to me. I'd be more interested in exploring the link of something like Red-3924 and Butylated Hydroxyanisole. Who the hell knows what that does? Maybe it looks and tastes great or it causes nasty lumps on your liver. It will be interesting to see what research like this turns up in 10-15 years. My bet is that it's this generation's form of asbestos or lead paint, but it's only a small bet for now.
I personally avoid "ultra processed food" because I think it tastes like crap. But, that's only because I prefer to taste more than what normally amounts to just a lot of salt and fat, which I have a feeling usually results in bad health when overdone on the industrial scale (and it normally is). But some people can't get enough of it! Do what you like, but don't be surprised if it makes life uncomfortable.
Eat your fruits and veggies guys! You can be that 100 year old guy running marathons and retiring at the end of the race to a nice long pipe.