Girlfriend's comments when I said I wanted to buy a new pipe...

[mso489]

If she accumulates some things, like clothes or books, etc., she can probably come around to understanding the situation. Also, you need to observe if she is very spare in all material acquisitions. Then the question is, does she expect you to be the same? Some people want absolute austerity in their lives and expect the same from others. I suspect you can work it out with no problem. Your pipe collection might eventually be quite pleasing to her.

 

[phil67]

Tell her that in lieu of pipe smoking and purchasing more pipes you are considering taking up chewing tobacco as it's much cheaper. I'm sure after she considers that alternative and the mere thought of that disgusting habit should be enough to make her go out and buy you a seven day Dunhill set of pipes.

 

[jpmcwjr]

Exactly! And she'll not be liking the daily cleaning and polishing of the half dozen brass cuspidors you'll have around the house.....

 

[jkrug]

Sounds like it's gonna work itself out okay. When I started reading your post I was expecting a "pipes or me...I'm gonna miss her" type of ending. Happy puffing. 8O
Start showing her the $2000 artisan pipes that catch your eye and then she'll be elated when you settle for a couple good Savinellis or Petersons. ::

 

[huntertrw]

""Hmm, yeah, you're right, you are right, they are sort of like girlfriends that way...""
By Jove, I think he's got it!

 

[jmatt]

You're gonna need at least 7 in rotation for latakia blends. Another 7 for VaPers. And 7 for straight Virginias. And maybe another 7 if you smoke any Aros. And that's the "starter" set.

 

[beerandbaccy]

You're gonna need at least 7 in rotation for latakia blends. Another 7 for VaPers. And 7 for straight Virginias. And maybe another 7 if you smoke any Aros. And that's the "starter" set

I'll let her know this is the bare minimum - and once I start something there's no stopping......!

 

[pipebuddy]

beerandbaccy, my wife used to complain a lot about my looking at pipes and tobaccos as well as buying them.

One night, I was really inspired to reply something as I was getting slightly irritaded after one of her comments. So I looked at her and said: "Yes, babe, I do enjoy a lot looking at and buying pipes and tobaccos. Would you rather have me drink, gamble and chase women, instead?"

Risky, but very honest comment to remind her she was lucky that I am a good husband. That was the end of it, she never complained again.

 

[gregprince]

Sjmiller, I don't have a diagnosis, that I know of, and I don't respond well to ultimatums either. They are a form of violence and that's not how you deal with people you care about.

 

[disinformatique]

My fiancee at the time (now my ex) got me into pipe smoking. If we were to get married I wouldnt have this issue. She although complained about the mountains of tobacco tins I kept sending her to cellar. Now to get those back....but thats another story for another time.

 

[deathmetal]

"pipes or me...I'm gonna miss her"

Best country song ever...

Don't care who it is, telling me do this or else or do this or this will happen, etc. never ends well for the person making the demand. I will do the opposite of what they want even if it kills me. I have no inner voice of reason in such situations. I realize this is no doubt part of why I am single but nonetheless, my question is this: how do you married or otherwise attached gentlemen not find such demands irritating, demeaning,etc.?

You are not alone. Ultimatums are destructive and in my view, should never come into a relationship. If you say to your spouse/partner, "We need to talk about this," there is room for both sides to have some say in the decision. An ultimatum is a unilateral decision presented to you for approval, with the thought that disapproval leads to some extreme consequence. It's basically the "pipes or me... I'll miss them" formula from above, inverted.