Favorite Movie Quotes/Lines ?

[crawdad]

(when confronted with a toll booth) ... "Le Petomane Through Way"? Now what'll that asshole think of next? Has anybody got a dime? (cowboys grumble) Somebody's gotta go back and get a shitload of dimes!

Just about everything in Blazing Saddles

 

[mso489]

From My Cousin Vinnie: "What's a grit?"

 

[jaytex1969]

 

[weezell]

Ren: DON'T MAKE ME USE THIS! ONE STEP CLOSER, I'M WARNING YA! DON'T MAKE ME USE IT! {Stimpy takes a step forward} Now you've done it! YOU FORCED ME TO USE IT!

 

[magicpiper]

Dirty Harry...”A man’s got to know his limitations.”

 

[crawdad]

”Take your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty ape!”

-Planet of the Apes

 

[gamzultovah]

A yout? What’s a yout? ~ My Cousin Vinny

 

[crawdad]

“You talking to me?”

-Taxi Driver

 

[mso489]

Blazing Saddles, when he thought his friend had been strung up: "They said that you was hung!"

Plucky answer: "And they was right."

 

[mso489]

A young lovely is startled by Mae West's extravagant jewels: "Goodness!"
And Mae West, sultry, says: "Goodness had nothing to do with it."

 

[smudgersmissingleg]

There are a few from Jaws:
"We're gonna need a bigger boat"
And pretty much everything Quint says?

"You have city hands, Mr. Hooper. You been countin' money all your life."

"Back home we got a taxidermy man. He gonna have a heart attack when he see what I brung him."

"Here lies the body of Mary Lee; died at the age of a hundred and three. For fifteen years she kept her virginity; not a bad record for this vicinity."

Quint : [on board the Orca] Goddamn women today, they can't handle nothin'. Young girls just ain't quite smart... like their grandmothers were!
Ellen Brody : [on the dock] Gotta be Quint.
Brody : Colorful, isn't he?

And don't get me started on Unforgiven or we'll be here all day, my favourite quotes are at the end of the movie:

Little Bill: Well sir, you are a cowardly son of a bitch. You just shot an unarmed man.
Will Munny: He should have armed himself....... if he's going to decorate his saloon with my friend.

Will Munny: I've killed women and children. I've killed everything that walks or crawls at one time or another. And I'm here to kill you, Little Bill, for what you done to Ned.

Little Bill: I don't deserve this... to die like this. I was building a house.
Will Munny: Deserve's got nothin' to do with it.

 

[tobefrank]

Schwarzenegger in Commando:
John Matrix: “Remember, Sully, when I promised to kill you last?”

Sully: “That’s right, Matrix! You did!”

John Matrix: “…I lied.”

 

[Merton]

"Your brother Harry Bailey fell through the ice and drowned at the age of nine."
"That's a lie, Harry Bailey went to war, he saved the life of every man on that transport."
"Every man on that transport died. Harry wasn't there to save them because you weren't there to save Harry. You see George, you really have had a wonderful life."

 

[tobefrank]

 

[wyfbane]

I don’t want to sell anything, buy anything, or process anything as a career. I don’t want to sell anything bought or processed, or buy anything sold or processed, or process anything sold, bought, or processed, or repair anything sold, bought, or processed. You know, as a career, I don’t want to do that.
~John Cusack Say Anything

Everybody relax, I'm here.
~Kurt Russell - Big Trouble in Little China

Lo Pan: Then Ching Dai will be happy and my curse will be lifted!
Jack Burton: And go off to rule the universe from beyond the grave.
Lo Pan: Indeed!
Jack Burton: Or check into a psycho ward, whichever comes first huh?
~James Hong/Kurt Russell - Big Trouble in Little China

That's it Brewster! Drive until you hear glass and smell shit!
and
Kick his ass, Brewster! Don't take that shit from this fungus faced toad-sucker!
~Robby Still - Six Pack

Strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no system for a basis of government! Supreme executive power derives from a a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony. Oh but you can't expect to wield supreme executive power just ‘cause some watery tart threw a sword at you. I mean if I went around, sayin' I was an emperor, just because some moistened bint lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away.
~Michael Palin - Monty Python and the Holy Grail

and of course, one of my chief sayings from my teenage years:

Come and see the violence inherent in the system! Help! Help! I'm bein' repressed!!
~Michael Palin - Monty Python and the Holy Grail

Alright, alright, alright!
Matthew McConaughey - Dazed and Confused

Years ago my mother used to say to me, she'd say, 'In this world, Elwood, you must be' - she always called me Elwood - 'In this world, Elwood, you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant.' Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasant. You may quote me.
~Jimmy Stewart - Harvey

We're on a mission from God.
~Dan Akroyd - The Blues Brothers

I don't know where you can go, but you can't stay here...
Virtually everyone to Cary Grant - I was a Male War Bride

I give you the boy. Give me back the man.
~Lee Marvin - Paint Your Wagon

Chris: You forget one thing. We took a contract.
Vin: It's sure not the kind any court would enforce.
Chris: That's just the kind you've got to keep.
~Yul Brynner and Steve McQueen - The Magnificent Seven

 

[troutface]

"There are only two things more beautiful than a good gun: a Swiss watch or a woman from anywhere. Ever had a good... Swiss watch?" Cherry in Red River

 

[smudgersmissingleg]

Jesse Ventura has some pretty funny lines as Blain in Predator:

Offers the men some chew which they turn down (could also apply to Ennerdale)
"Bunch of slack-jawed faggots around here. This stuff will make you a god damned sexual Tyrannosaurus, just like me."

"Son of a bitch is dug in like an Alabama tick."

Poncho : You're hit, man. You're bleedin'.
Blain : I ain't got time to bleed.


And then you have R. Lee Ermey's show stealing turn as Gunnery Sergeant Hartman in Full Metal Jacket:

"I bet you're the kind of guy that would fuck a person in the ass and not even have the goddamn common courtesy to give him a reach-around. I'll be watching you."

"Tonight, you pukes will sleep with your rifles. You will give your rifle a girl's name because this is the only pussy you people are going to get. Your days of finger-banging ol' Mary-Jane Rottencrotch through her pretty pink panties are over! You're married to this piece. This weapon of iron and wood. And you will be faithful. Port, hut!"

"Today... is Christmas! There will be a magic show at zero-nine-thirty! Chaplain Charlie will tell you about how the free world will conquer Communism with the aid of God and a few Marines! God has a hard-on for Marines because we kill everything we see! He plays His games, we play ours! To show our appreciation for so much power, we keep heaven packed with fresh souls! God was here before the Marine Corps! So you can give your heart to Jesus, but your ass belongs to the Corps! Do you ladies understand?"

"Well, no shit. What have we got here, a fucking comedian? Private Joker? I admire your honesty. Hell, I like you. You can come over to my house and fuck my sister."

 

[magicpiper]

From The Outlaw Josey Wales....

Wales: “ You a bounty hunter?”

Bounty Hunter: “A man’s got to do something for a living these days.”

Wales: “Dyin’ ain’t much of a living, boy.”

 

[username]

“I’d rather spit in your face but I haven’t gotten any spit”. When the bad guy offers Brody a drink of water in last crusade.

 

[jaytex1969]