Comebacks for Anit-Smoking Nazis

[mate]

I'll be posting suggested comebacks for those sheepeople, that have joined the flock of Anti-Smoking Nazis
If you are easily offended or on the Politically Correct bandwagon, just don't read the post
S: = Smoker, that means you
ASS: = Anti-Smoking Sheepople
Example
ASS: "What ever you are smoking, smells so bad"
S: "Yes but it masks out your halitosis"

 

[mate]

ASS: "What do you get out of smoking"
S: "Well it's great after sex, you should try it sometime if you can pay someone to have sex with you"

 

[pstlpkr]

S: Do you drink?

ASS: No.

S: Don't drink or smoke... neither did Hitler.

 

[mate]

ASS: "I'd never let my husband / wife smoke"
S: "If I was your husband / wife, smoking would be the least of your worries, I'd be on Crack"

 

[mate]

ASS: "Smoking has terrible consequence"
S: Yes but so does procreation, your parents had you"

 

[igloo]

You would be driving on dirt if there were no tobacco taxs to collect .

 

[mate]

ASS: "Smoking pollutes the air around me"
S: " So how is that different to your brain fart, that you are sharing with me"

 

[mate]

ASS: "Smoking causes you to age prematurely"
S: "Well then you are obviously a 3 pack a day person"

 

[unclearthur]

ASS: Why do you smoke
S: To calm my nerves so I don't strangle busybody assholes

 

[mate]

ASS: "Give me one good reason to smoke"
S: "It offends obnoxious, self opinionated, intellectually challenged people"

 

[igloo]

Ive failed the Postal exam three times and you just had to f..k with me .

 

[mate]

ASS: "Give me another good reason to smoke"
S: "It clouds out you image"

 

[mate]

ASS: Quoting some statistic
S: Yes well statistics also say most pedophiles are non smokers"

 

[mate]

ASS: "Do you really enjoy the taste of that"
S: "Its not just the taste, having something in your mouth can be very comforting, if you want to see what I mean, feel free to blow me"

 

[mate]

ASS: "They say kissing a smoker is like licking an ash tray"
S: "And kissing you would be like licking a toilet bowl for me"

 

[mate]

ASS: "I'm totally against smoking"
S: " I can empathize with your sentiment as you live in fear of being turned into bacon"

 

[mate]

ASS: "You are a slave to tobacco"
S: Its still healthier than being in a BDSM relationship with you"

 

[mate]

ASS: "Do you think smoking make you look cool"
S: "Not as cool as you would look if you pulled your bottom lip over your forehead and swallowed"

 

[mate]

ASS: "Think of all the money you could save if you stopped smoking"
S: "Yea, then I could donate to your personality implant"

 

[mate]

ASS: "Think of all the money you could save if you stopped smoking"
S: "Yea, then I could donate to your personality implant"