You Can Do Anything You Set Your Mind To: No

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mso489

Lifer
Feb 21, 2013
41,211
60,675
Regarding the ancient mantra of encouragement for young people, you can do anything you set your mind to, it is a kind, generous, and misleading saying. Most of growing up is finding out what your talents and strong points are, which means finding out all of the dozens of activities at which you have limited or no capabilities. I had the dexterity and focus to be a brain surgeon, but I didn't have the algebra through calculus proficiency nor the chemistry aptitude to get to med school. I could have hammered my head against the wall and maybe even graduated med school, but I would have been a master of ambition not medicine. The poor patients. No, you have to set your mind to what you can do well, whether it is socially glorified or just what you thoroughly enjoy doing. I think it's cruel to set kids up for dreams they can't attain or that would make them unhappy if attained.
 

ashdigger

Lifer
Jul 30, 2016
11,434
71,171
61
Vegas Baby!!!
You absolutely can do anything you set your mind to. The freedom to succeed is also the freedom to fail and learn.

Failure is not final if you get up, dust you self off and try again.

I disagree it’s a misleading statement. Trying, learning and evolving are all part of growing up.

When I was growing up I wanted to be an aquatic biologist, so I worked at a university in the field. It wasn’t for me. Did I fail? Nope, I learned.

I then engaged in two other careers that I don’t do any more. Did I fail, no I learned.

I’m currently a Fire Investigator and have been doing this for 17 years. I’m 58.

I refuse to believe dreams are dead. I refuse to accept limiting beliefs.
 

ashdigger

Lifer
Jul 30, 2016
11,434
71,171
61
Vegas Baby!!!
As a further note. Success takes hard work. Hard work doesn’t mean you’re covered in shit every day. It means you show up, early, ready to go and not late and whiny.

If you want to succeed. You’ll succeed. If you want to kinda succeed, you’ll fail.

77C8C6D9-9CB7-4A63-9F14-73FB91FFE6CE.jpeg
 

mingc

Lifer
Jun 20, 2019
4,372
12,923
The Big Rock Candy Mountains
You absolutely can do anything you set your mind to. The freedom to succeed is also the freedom to fail and learn.

Failure is not final if you get up, dust you self off and try again.

I disagree it’s a misleading statement. Trying, learning and evolving are all part of growing up.

When I was growing up I wanted to be an aquatic biologist, so I worked at a university in the field. It wasn’t for me. Did I fail? Nope, I learned.

I then engaged in two other careers that I don’t do any more. Did I fail, no I learned.

I’m currently a Fire Investigator and have been doing this for 17 years. I’m 58.

I refuse to believe dreams are dead. I refuse to accept limiting beliefs.
Your post reminds of the line, "There's no success like failure, and failure's no success at all."

As for me, I seem to draw all the wrong lessons from my failures. But it's early yet, and I'm still on my first bottle of gin. Cheers!
 

shanez

Lifer
Jul 10, 2018
5,594
27,285
50
Las Vegas
It's a nice saying but I agree that it can be misleading,

I'm 46 and both of my shoulders are shot to the point I need surgery on both. Not matter how much effort I put into it, the reality is I will never become a professional quarterback and win the superbowl.

The saying just simply overlooks some physical realities.
 

cosmicfolklore

Moderator
Staff member
Aug 9, 2013
36,188
87,965
Between the Heart of Alabama and Hot Springs NC
I have to agree with MSO. People have cultural and even internal obstacles that we (on the outside) can't always see. In coaching debate, the school had a principal that put up signs in each classroom as sort of a schoolwide moto, "You can be anything you want to be." But, this sparked conversations with special needs kids and other kids that made the moto less comfortable.

One little special kid that was like under 5 feet tall hurt my heart. He had his whole life a dream to play basketball for Alabama. His dad said that he practices every day, and has since he was 5 years old. His dad has bought personal trainers, and his whole family supported him. He was even invited by UA to watch games on the sideline. But, the kid, despite his best efforts couldn't be taught the coordination, nor the skills needed to be a player. He had the heart, just not the skills. Despite as his dad said, he worked every day on practicing. He, of course couldn't go to college, but was accepted into a special program there. But, the basketball coach wanted to make him a towel boy, or whatever they are called nowadays, but because of rules and such, his hands were tied.

We don't have blind pilots. Not too many deaf musicians. Special needs is very limited. Even among the not special, sometimes not being able to meet a hoop that needs jumping through is a limit. Hell, if I suddenly wanted to be a fighter pilot, there are dozen or more things that would prohibit that.

The principal soon removed the signs at the request of the teachers. For many kids just passing their classes is the challenge at hand.

Talent can not be taught, and not all disabilities can be overcome with a strong heart, will, and drive.
 
Last edited:

warren

Lifer
Sep 13, 2013
12,551
19,321
Foothills of the Chugach Range, AK
I'd never set limits on a youngster's horizons. If they don't try ... they'll never achieve. Life isn't supposed to be fun and games, it's a damned serious proposition and to be successful means failures as well as successes. But, there are people who are happy to be what ever they are. Some others need challenges as they go through life. Maybe they find they need to strengthen a weakness in order to be a surgeon. Nope, I can't step on kid's dreams, only encourage them and, where possible, assist.

I learned early in my career that I'd need to improve my math skills in order to be able to reconstruct accidents. So, off to community college for some HS level, remedial math. Somewhat embarrassing but, worth the effort. You gotta do what you gotta do to reach goals.

Many people never learn what they can do well.
 

lawdawg

Lifer
Aug 25, 2016
1,792
3,812
I'm with MSO on this one. I think all of this "you can do anything in the world!" stuff was originally about boosting kids' self-esteem, which perhaps for a time was a good thing. However, I think we have collectively surpassed the point where now perhaps unmerited exceedingly high self-esteem has become more troubling than low self-esteem.
 

cosmicfolklore

Moderator
Staff member
Aug 9, 2013
36,188
87,965
Between the Heart of Alabama and Hot Springs NC
It doesn't matter a hill of beans how hard someone tries to increase their IQ, you can increase your score in certain areas with practice, but ultimately the very definition of IQ is your innate ability, whether you reach your potential working IQ ability or not. And, for all of us, to reach our full potential working IQ is also a lot of work, no matter where you fall on the spectrum. 95% of the world tests below the genius level. No amount of studying will fix potential IQ. You can far outreach potential achievement though, but that is a far cry from becoming whatever you set your hearts to.
 

jguss

Lifer
Jul 7, 2013
2,790
7,769
My step-father used to say if you don’t ask it’s an automatic no. The point is if you try you might fail, but not trying guarantees failure. “Finding out what your talents and strong points are” is a trial-and-error process, with failure at many steps along the way. And in the end if we’re lucky (which often means persistent) we end up in a field where our appetite and aptitude aligns.
 

cosmicfolklore

Moderator
Staff member
Aug 9, 2013
36,188
87,965
Between the Heart of Alabama and Hot Springs NC
and not the hard work behind it.
In my example of the basketball kid. I don't think it is possible for someone to work harder. What, so we tell blind kids to work harder and maybe one day they can hear well enough to play music? Tell the special needs kid to work hard enough to one day be a rocket scientist? "Just work harder." At some point we have to acknowledge that some things just can't be taught or learned. I can teach anyone to paint. I just can't teach the talent it takes to make a great work of art. But, yeh, anyone can paint.

Sorry, just years of studying the nature of creativity has given me a different perspective.
 

mso489

Lifer
Feb 21, 2013
41,211
60,675
Actually, I think ashdigger and I are mostly on the same page. Being open to aspirations of young people, and supporting them in the hard work it takes to attain their goals is absolutely correct. I think it is the sorting through your strengths, your weaknesses, and your path to a career is important. Dazzling young people into thinking they can be "anything" seems misguided. You can do anything with the talents you have, and we'll work hard to find out what those talents are. Affirming other people is important, and much more powerful than people realize, but doing it with the right nuance counts too.
 

ashdigger

Lifer
Jul 30, 2016
11,434
71,171
61
Vegas Baby!!!
In my example of the basketball kid. I don't think it is possible for someone to work harder. What, so we tell blind kids to work harder and maybe one day they can hear well enough to play music? Tell the special needs kid to work hard enough to one day be a rocket scientist? "Just work harder." At some point we have to acknowledge that some things just can't be taught or learned. I can teach anyone to paint. I just can't teach the talent it takes to make a great work of art. But, yeh, anyone can paint.

Sorry, just years of studying the nature of creativity has given me a different perspective.
another hit and miss.

I guess its about perspective. Obviously a 4 foot human can't play in the NBA, but that misses the mark.

The way I interpret the original quote is about hard work. Not unrealistic fantasies.

Oh well. I guess failure is an option and I'll quite my job, because i was never a fire fighter.

Thanks guys, I've now been schooled and my potential has been squashed, Damn, if I worked one more fire I was going to get a free set of steak knives.
 
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Servant King

Geriatric Millennial
Nov 27, 2020
5,320
31,885
39
Frazier Park, CA
www.thechembow.com
It doesn't matter a hill of beans how hard someone tries to increase their IQ, you can increase your score in certain areas with practice, but ultimately the very definition of IQ is your innate ability, whether you reach your potential working IQ ability or not. And, for all of us, to reach our full potential working IQ is also a lot of work, no matter where you fall on the spectrum. 95% of the world tests below the genius level. No amount of studying will fix potential IQ. You can far outreach potential achievement though, but that is a far cry from becoming whatever you set your hearts to.
I'm trying to increase my 1Q right now, but I'm going to just be patient and wait for SP to do another Lane bulk sale. My IQ is high enough to at least discern this much wiser course of action. Keeps my bank account higher too.

I agree with @lawdawg as well, regarding the disingenuous nature of the self-esteem movement. I know George Carlin had some things to say about that in his later years...nothing complimentary, of course!
 
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