Schadenfreude

Here's an article I've recently written and posted in another Forum.

I thought that people here might be interested as well....
Just as the lemmings, driven by a sense of urgency, migrate to the sea, it seems to be part of our nature to seek pleasures that are not readily available to others, while deriving great satisfaction, if for no other reason, because they are rare and generally unobtainable. Intertwined with this we will likely find the pursuit of excellence, often used as a means of demonstrating that our quest is justified. Where things become smug is when the possession of otherwise unobtainable things becomes reason to denigrate all else. This is not to be confused with the pride of ownership and accomplishment that bears no intent of elitism, or regression to the old playground mentality that “My dog is tougher than your dog.” With such, there is generally a sense of gratitude for good fortune and sometimes the desire to share, without boasting or grand display. Such is the drama of our pursuit of Pipes and tobaccos. This is the maelstrom of dispute commonly present as a strong undercurrent in our small community of Pipe smokers. It’s an issue that ignites as quickly as a grass fire and spreads rapidly into an emotional rout. This is the crucible that changes things for us all, even in polite discourse. Interlopers seek to fan the flames, while the emancipated watch the show. It is the dark side to the Pipe smoking community. The epicenter of this matter starts with the desire to seek something better and becomes perverted with the separation of those who have and those who don’t. This is the troll that must be taken from underneath the bridge and examined in the light of day. No, I don’t expect to abolish this perversion by doing so, anymore than the preacher in church expects to rid the world of the seven deadly sins by a single sermon. My idea is simple. As with many things in life, problems must be recognized and admitted before they can besolved before we advance to the next level of development. Recognizing that schadenfreude (a malicious satisfaction obtained from the misfortunes of others) is just that, a problem that is blocking personal growth which is the key to emancipation and greater appreciation of our passion for Pipe smoking and its’ culture. This is the realization that envy and prejudice are the reasons for mendacity in a community divided by personal preference and choices that are generally based on imposed personal limitations of budget expenditure.
Pipe smoking is all about personal choice, so it is in your best interests to know what the choices are and if they fit your budget. Most of us start out trying to get what we can while staying within our budget limitations. There will always be bills to pay and not everyone makes enough money to live as they would like to become accustomed to. Some feel comfortable in paying as much for a Pipe as others spend on a house payment, or more. Things start to get twisted when the money starts to flow. The guy who spends a large amount on a Pipe and/or tobacco suddenly becomes the target of scorn from those who consider this as foolish. The guy who has spent a big chunk of cash on what others consider a luxury can get defensive about it in the response to this unsolicited judgment. Both parties feel that they are perfectly justified in exercising their right to freedom of speech. This is the beginning of the ‘us & them’ dichotomy that serves to fragment and divide our community. This situation is the goal for those who like to get things stirred up and sit back to watch the fight. This is the source of the debate of “Does a $2,000 Pipe really smoke better than a $5 Pipe?” It is at this point that dead horses are flogged as well as where people become prisoners of their own convictions, and here they will remain until they choose to leave the pit they have dug for themselves. The way out is the realization that this is a trap. It is also useful to discard explanations of why people say & do things, which are not always the same, but instead, become interested in what the person is attempting to do, by saying whatever it is that they say. People change the reasons they give themselves for what it is they want to do or get, but the goal of what it is that they set out to accomplish remains the same. At the same time, there is no shortage of people who feel it is their mission in life to bring others to their way of thinking, usually for reasons of self aggrandizement, masquerading as something desirable and therefore good. The fight is on, but what is the price of victory? Could it be that the truth is that Pipe smoking is not about competition? Have you have thrown your toys out of the car? Then you have forgotten the early experiences of the pleasures of Pipe smoking. If it bothers you that someone has spent more money on something that they really wanted than you have available for your pursuits and responsibilities, then you can’t be having much fun either. Envy and jealousy have eaten up the joy that you have with your choices. I guess that the anti-tobacco zealots aren’t making you unhappy enough, so you have to set about to enflame the general sense of controversy and conflict, eh? Those who want to sell you something or convince you that they are the experts are counting on this discontent.
Life is not always simple and uncomplicated, so why can’t Pipe smoking remain the simple pleasure it is intended to be? Are there too many choices or not enough? Do you need to have the unobtainable in order to be happy, or must you feel content with what you feel you have to settle with? This is the no win scenario that is scripted by those who would like to keep the fires of controversy burning. Understanding this is the first step to being free of this trap. Smoke your Pipes and share what you’ve learned with those who will listen. This is really as good as it gets. Personal choice is just that and not a prescription to be held up for all to follow as the true path to happiness. If you cannot accept this, then you take yourself far too seriously. Pipe smoking is supposed to be about having fun, not about setting yourself up as a standard by which others are to be judged. For me, what works nicely is to enjoy both what I’ve found in my travels into the ways of the Pipe and to try and understand the joys that others have discovered in their journey as well. I choose not to be a slave to anyone’s standards or personal choices. I choose the freedom of discovery. How about you? What do you choose? I think it’s time to have a smoke

Thanks guys! Every once in awhile, we all need a return to basics...

Thanks guys. Key factors at play in elitism, or anti-elitism for that matter,

include a lack of self awareness. Recognizing this is the beginning of change.

This is the 600 pound gorilla that no one wants to openly acknowledge and it

will remain resident in dialogue long after I've turned to dust. Perhaps this

missive will stay on the wall long enough to begin a process of change in the

individual, which starts with the question: "Do I have a problem?"