Pipe Songs/Poems/Limericks/Jokes/Plays/Movies...???

I'll go first....
The Peace-Pipe by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
On the Mountains of the Prairie,

On the great Red Pipe-stone Quarry,

Gitche Manito, the mighty,

He the Master of Life, descending,

On the red crags of the quarry

Stood erect, and called the nations,

Called the tribes of men together.

From his footprints flowed a river,

Leaped into the light of morning,

O'er the precipice plunging downward

Gleamed like Ishkoodah, the comet.

And the Spirit, stooping earthward,

With his finger on the meadow

Traced a winding pathway for it,

Saying to it, "Run in this way!"

From the red stone of the quarry

With his hand he broke a fragment,

Moulded it into a pipe-head,

Shaped and fashioned it with figures;

From the margin of the river

Took a long reed for a pipe-stem,

With its dark green leaves upon it;

Filled the pipe with bark of willow,

With the bark of the red willow;

Breathed upon the neighboring forest,

Made its great boughs chafe together,

Till in flame they burst and kindled;

And erect upon the mountains,

Gitche Manito, the mighty,

Smoked the calumet, the Peace-Pipe,

As a signal to the nations.

And the smoke rose slowly, slowly,

Through the tranquil air of morning,

First a single line of darkness,

Then a denser, bluer vapor,

Then a snow-white cloud unfolding,

Like the tree-tops of the forest,

Ever rising, rising, rising,

Till it touched the top of heaven,

Till it broke against the heaven,

And rolled outward all around it.

From the Vale of Tawasentha,

From the Valley of Wyoming,

From the groves of Tuscaloosa,

From the far-off Rocky Mountains,

From the Northern lakes and rivers

All the tribes beheld the signal,

Saw the distant smoke ascending,

The Pukwana of the Peace-Pipe.

And the Prophets of the nations

Said: "Behold it, the Pukwana!

By the signal of the Peace-Pipe,

Bending like a wand of willow,

Waving like a hand that beckons,

Gitche Manito, the mighty,

Calls the tribes of men together,

Calls the warriors to his council!"

Down the rivers, o'er the prairies,

Came the warriors of the nations,

Came the Delawares and Mohawks,

Came the Choctaws and Camanches,

Came the Shoshonies and Blackfeet,

Came the Pawnees and Omahas,

Came the Mandans and Dacotahs,

Came the Hurons and Ojibways,

All the warriors drawn together

By the signal of the Peace-Pipe,

To the Mountains of the Prairie,

To the great Red Pipe-stone Quarry,

And they stood there on the meadow,

With their weapons and their war-gear,

Painted like the leaves of Autumn,

Painted like the sky of morning,

Wildly glaring at each other;

In their faces stem defiance,

In their hearts the feuds of ages,

The hereditary hatred,

The ancestral thirst of vengeance.

Gitche Manito, the mighty,

The creator of the nations,

Looked upon them with compassion,

With paternal love and pity;

Looked upon their wrath and wrangling

But as quarrels among children,

But as feuds and fights of children!

Over them he stretched his right hand,

To subdue their stubborn natures,

To allay their thirst and fever,

By the shadow of his right hand;

Spake to them with voice majestic

As the sound of far-off waters,

Falling into deep abysses,

Warning, chiding, spake in this wise :

"O my children! my poor children!

Listen to the words of wisdom,

Listen to the words of warning,

From the lips of the Great Spirit,

From the Master of Life, who made you!

"I have given you lands to hunt in,

I have given you streams to fish in,

I have given you bear and bison,

I have given you roe and reindeer,

I have given you brant and beaver,

Filled the marshes full of wild-fowl,

Filled the rivers full of fishes:

Why then are you not contented?

Why then will you hunt each other?

"I am weary of your quarrels,

Weary of your wars and bloodshed,

Weary of your prayers for vengeance,

Of your wranglings and dissensions;

All your strength is in your union,

All your danger is in discord;

Therefore be at peace henceforward,

And as brothers live together.

"I will send a Prophet to you,

A Deliverer of the nations,

Who shall guide you and shall teach you,

Who shall toil and suffer with you.

If you listen to his counsels,

You will multiply and prosper;

If his warnings pass unheeded,

You will fade away and perish!

"Bathe now in the stream before you,

Wash the war-paint from your faces,

Wash the blood-stains from your fingers,

Bury your war-clubs and your weapons,

Break the red stone from this quarry,

Mould and make it into Peace-Pipes,

Take the reeds that grow beside you,

Deck them with your brightest feathers,

Smoke the calumet together,

And as brothers live henceforward!"

Then upon the ground the warriors

Threw their cloaks and shirts of deer-skin,

Threw their weapons and their war-gear,

Leaped into the rushing river,

Washed the war-paint from their faces.

Clear above them flowed the water,

Clear and limpid from the footprints

Of the Master of Life descending;

Dark below them flowed the water,

Soiled and stained with streaks of crimson,

As if blood were mingled with it!

From the river came the warriors,

Clean and washed from all their war-paint;

On the banks their clubs they buried,

Buried all their warlike weapons.

Gitche Manito, the mighty,

The Great Spirit, the creator,

Smiled upon his helpless children!

And in silence all the warriors

Broke the red stone of the quarry,

Smoothed and formed it into Peace-Pipes,

Broke the long reeds by the river,

Decked them with their brightest feathers,

And departed each one homeward,

While the Master of Life, ascending,

Through the opening of cloud-curtains,

Through the doorways of the heaven,

Vanished from before their faces,

In the smoke that rolled around him,

The Pukwana of the Peace-Pipe!
Pipestone National Monument is a really interesting place to visit. I got to know some of the carvers after repeated visits.
http://www.nps.gov/pipe/

Mlaug, thanks so much for that excellent post and super link! Of late I've taken an interest in our tobacco pipe smoking pastime from a Native American perspective.

I learned catlinite pipe making from two Santee Souix gentlemen. They are primarily tourist trade carvers and sell out of the monument store for their livelihood. The store sells pipes, fetishes, and other trinkets. I expressed enough interest, on a visit in the mid 80's, that they invited me back to one of their homes. They showed me their other work, non-tourist pipes made for native people all over the US. We went back the next year. In one week I was given a quickie course in traditional pipe making ( no metal tools ). We camped at a local KOA campground and every day I'd sit and work on my stone, if I had any questions or problem with technique they were very helpful in getting me on track again. The first pipe I made, I used a metal rasp and file and a power drill.
Inspired by my mentors, my second pipe was traditionally made.
It took me almost two years and it was a profoundly moving experience. There is a lot of mental prep in making a pipe traditionally. Being right minded before one can even pick up the stone is important...the whole pipe making experience is to end up with a tool that is suitable to offer prayer and thanks to whatever one thinks of as their supreme being..God , as it were. Its highly personal. Native people don't have any dogma,or theology, so this will vary from individual to individual. They also taught me how they loaded their pipe and smoked it. I don't pretend to be native, that would be silly, but I will admit that it has taken my smoking to a different level of experience and awareness.
Back to pipe carving...I would get discouraged at my slow progress, but kept at it. For example, to bore the bowl one uses hardened dowels and sand, grinding it back and forth as one gradually works it deeper into the stone. The stem is made from a suitable wood ( sumac in my case ) and a hot reed is slowing pushed through the stem, burning the stem hole as it gets deeper. I ruined several stems before I got it right.
It takes a year to even get the stem wood! One searches for an appropriately straight length piece and one is supposed to make a prayer offering of tobacco to the plant. A small bundle is tied to the future stem and left for one year. The next year, you have permission to cut the stem.
The biggest difference between the way we smoke our pipes and they way they smoke is attitude. For them, it isn't so much a recreational activity. It is, however, an activity that places them in a right frame of mind.
That is something common to all pipe smokers, no matter their culture background.

Here's an interesting read...

http://www.gutenberg.org/files/14887/14887-h/14887-h.htm