Until I started smoking a pipe. When you want a pipe you just fill it up and go. You don't need to take it to dinner, listen to it complain about it's day, pretend to agree about how wonderful obamacare is or that Hillary would make a great president. When you're done, you don't need to cuddle with it, talk about what the future holds, go antiquing with it on sunday. It doesn't care if you walk the dog, put out the trash or mow the lawn. It sits quietly while you're watching the game, making itself available if you want it but otherwise being unobtrusive. And if you want to bring in another pipe, it doesn't cry, call you a bastard or throw your things out on the front lawn.
And best of all, in a pinch, if you really need to, that hole doesn't need to be filled with tobacco.
And best of all, in a pinch, if you really need to, that hole doesn't need to be filled with tobacco.
