How to Temporarily Stave Off PAD?

sparrowhawk · Feb 3, 2016

Well, this is going to be a problem: I have to save up money for a Great Lakes cruise on a freighter--a unique way to travel I think you'll agree--but just because it isn't a Carnival ship, how can I keep PAD at bay while I'm saving enough to pay for the freighter trip? I bought a last, I hope, Peterson churchwarden and can just see myself smoking it on a lakeside rail cruising through the Lakes, but in order to afford this trip I can't buy any more pipes. Can it be done? How does one keep PAD from consuming one's mind? Argh!

jvnshr · Feb 3, 2016

Of course it can be done. Last year we had a baby in October and I bought my last pipe after few days (Peterson as well) and since then I haven't bought any pipe or tobacco. I am barely smoking once a day so my tobacco lasts for a long time. There are dozens of pipes I see everyday that I like and I don't buy. I know that I have more important tasks to complete with money. Just stop checking pipes online/offline and think about your cruise when you check them. And think about it; how many pipes do you have? 10? 20? More? I have only 4 MM cobs, 2 briars and 1 clay. I am doing fine with them.

huntertrw · Feb 3, 2016

"How to Temporarily Stave Off PAD?"
It's simple: Just say "no."

pitchfork · Feb 3, 2016

Just try to think about how much you enjoy the pipes you have, especially the ones you like best. That helps.
Also, freighter cruise should be fun. Many years ago, my wife and I sailed across the Atlantic on a freighter -- it was a blast.

skraps · Feb 3, 2016

I started reading this and had a laundry list of advice.... then I got distracted by the pipes2smoke ad on the left. Forgot what I was going to say... sorry. :roll:

Chasing Embers · Feb 3, 2016

Stay away from B&Ms, and avoid the internet like the plague.

cigrmaster · Feb 3, 2016

You need to completely stop looking at pipes. No ebay, no on line estate dealers, nothing. Tell yourself you have enough pipes and the trip is more important.

cosmicfolklore · Feb 3, 2016

We'll miss you!

swhipple · Feb 3, 2016

You'll be tempted for sure, but focus on how enjoyable the cruise will be. If you don't mind me asking, how much is a freighter cruise and how did you go about setting it up? Sounds like something I'd enjoy as well. Good luck containing the PAD.

cosmicfolklore · Feb 3, 2016

Yeh, what is a freighter cruise. Do you have to ride in one of those cargo boxes? Do they let you out for bathroom breaks? Sounds like fun!!

daveinlax · Feb 3, 2016

Tell your wife what you spent last year on pipes. That should help. 8O

mso489 · Feb 3, 2016

Uh-oh, the sponsors and Kevin won't be too happy with this thread. But seriously ... some months buying no pipes should be good for your piping. Stay away from retail shops and sites and focus instead on learning about history of pipes and tobacco. Develop information acquisition disorder. Keep your cruise materials close at hand, and plan details of that trip, whatever it involves -- what you plan to do in ports of call, what you plan to do with the hours at sea, books to read, projects. You might get a briar block to carve underway (if that doesn't qualify as PAD). If you do it with a pocket knife or carving kit, that should take forever. Get to know the pipes and blends you have on hand. Try mixing tobaccos you have. Put some elbow grease into polishing up your pipes. Smooth sailling. Please tell us about your trip, before and after.

mso489 · Feb 3, 2016

Will you make any ports where you could buy a pipe as a souvenir, like Blatter & Blatter in Montreal, or Iwan Ries in Chicago ... I'm not sure exactly what your ports of call would be. Neither of those needs to be a huge expense. Iwan Ries has house pipes, and B&B has some moderately priced pipes. That might help you hold off.

stvalentine · Feb 3, 2016

Oh well, I know of a lonely little spot on a moon in the outer spiral arm of this galaxy. I´ve heard that internet access is a mess there. Although it is said that some have managed to buy a pipe online from there it is considered relatively safe.

Ok, gotta go, there´s an auction ending any time soon..... 8O

rfernand · Feb 3, 2016

Replace your cobs.
File under "maintenance" instead of PAD.

jaygreen55 · Feb 3, 2016

Let your wife hold your credit cards and only give them to you for approved purhases

blackmouth · Feb 3, 2016

Start having corn-on-the-cobb with dinner a couple times a week and save the cobbs.

Then make yourself a new pipe out of the cob every time you get the itch.

Making a cob is awfully simple and extraordinarily low cost.

buckaroo · Feb 3, 2016

If tossing your pc or cutting your internet is not in the cards use the parental controls on your browser to block your favorite pipe websites. Should be enough to remind you of your goal.

frozenchurchwarden · Feb 3, 2016

1. Don't let anyone know that you're saving.

Take some old pipes, polish them up, and post pictures of them on the forums as though you just bought them. Even if it's your second time posting in the same thread, no-one will notice, people only skip to the last page on those anyway.
2. Most definitely don't post a thread saying that you're trying to avoid spending money: http://pipesmagazine.com/forums/topic/no-more-pipes-till-may

I'll make sure to post all my Pipe purchases here this year...

Which thus far is nothing. Even after I absolutely had to spend all my credit card Cash Back rewards because the card expires a few weeks after they give me the cash. I spent hours lining up various combinations of pipes that would fit in my budget, and in the end I bought some extra thick wool overalls to keep my fat rolls warm instead (flappy fat tends to get cold when I'm lounging around outside on a winter night, having pants with no belt will help consolidate warmth and let the blood flow easier).

sparrowhawk · Feb 4, 2016

Thanks for the sage advice, gentlemen. I will bookmark this and summon it everytime I boot up the computer. Now about the trip itself: a freighter is like a huge flat-bottomed bathtub--remember the Edmund Fitzgerald? But if you can find a way to book voyage on the ship (you just don't buy a ticket, for reasons too complicated to go into here) you live like the crew does. Ordinary meals in the mess with the crew or with the captain, you dress anyway you feel, there aren't any shops or tourist traps, and so forth. There's a TV in your room, the bed is probably more like a bunk. There are only about 10 passengers and no chorus girls. You can spend your time reading, writing (I'm going to take a journal and maybe extract a good essay out of this), or whatever you want to do, maybe visit the bridge. And you can SMOKE ANYWHERE YOU WANT!

I'm trying to do this trip to celebrate my onrushing birthday, my 60th or my 15th, depending on which birthday I wish to celebrate--I have two of them this year.A regular yearly birthday like the rest of you mortals, and my leap year birthday, when I was the first child born in the city shortly after midnight on February 29, 1956.
I'll let you know how the arrangements for the cruise work out as they happen.. Thanks for the advice, guys.

How to Temporarily Stave Off PAD?

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