This morning I stopped at my favorite grocery store. It’s a food chain where they also bake their own products.
I needed some rolls for sandwiches. I look at the rolls I always buy, have been for years, and I see on the label. “Made with organic flour.” “Oh boy“. I said to myself. “Not a good way to start my day.”
So I walk over to the counter where they do the baking. A nice lady asks if I need help.
“Yes. These rolls are organic. Do you have the non-organic?”
“Oh no. We discontinued those.” She tells me.
“You’re kidding, right?” I asked.
“No sir. The organic are much better for you. They have no preservatives.”
Now I’m getting a bit nervous.
“Look. I like preservatives.” I told her. “So you’re never going to make the preservative rolls again?” I asked.
“No. Sorry.” The nice lady answered. “But honestly, you won’t know the difference.”
“Look, you don’t understand.” I said. And she could tell I was upset.
“I like preservatives. I’ve been eating preservatives for 67 years and I’m still alive. My body likes preservatives. They taste good. If I give this body anything other than preservatives, it will go into shock. I may end up in a coma. I need my preservatives.”
Anyway, I walked outa there with a bag of organic rolls. But I also made sure I bought my salami with the preservatives, the fontenella cheese, with the preservatives, the olives with the preservatives, and a bag of cookies, with preservatives.
I needed some rolls for sandwiches. I look at the rolls I always buy, have been for years, and I see on the label. “Made with organic flour.” “Oh boy“. I said to myself. “Not a good way to start my day.”
So I walk over to the counter where they do the baking. A nice lady asks if I need help.
“Yes. These rolls are organic. Do you have the non-organic?”
“Oh no. We discontinued those.” She tells me.
“You’re kidding, right?” I asked.
“No sir. The organic are much better for you. They have no preservatives.”
Now I’m getting a bit nervous.
“Look. I like preservatives.” I told her. “So you’re never going to make the preservative rolls again?” I asked.
“No. Sorry.” The nice lady answered. “But honestly, you won’t know the difference.”
“Look, you don’t understand.” I said. And she could tell I was upset.
“I like preservatives. I’ve been eating preservatives for 67 years and I’m still alive. My body likes preservatives. They taste good. If I give this body anything other than preservatives, it will go into shock. I may end up in a coma. I need my preservatives.”
Anyway, I walked outa there with a bag of organic rolls. But I also made sure I bought my salami with the preservatives, the fontenella cheese, with the preservatives, the olives with the preservatives, and a bag of cookies, with preservatives.
