Smoking Competition

[phoenix]

Our annual pipe smoking competition for the west european area comes up on Saturday. I placed 14th in the competition last year and eighth in the West German regionals. My best time so far has been a little over an hour, but clearly I am smoking too quickly as the top guy goes for close to three hours on three grams. Any suggestions on how to beat this guy and become the top smart-ass would be highly appreciated.

 

[rmbittner]

No advice to offer, but I'll wish you "Good Luck" (even though I've never understood the appeal of such competitions).
Bob

 

[eaglerico]

Pull out a Playboy and take his breath away. By the time he recovers his pipe will be out. :D

 

[yazamitaz]

I also don't have much in the way of guidance, but do wish you much luck.

 

[kashmir]

Simple: Just smoke slower.

If you surreptitiously lick the tamper it'll slow your smoke down.

The amount of saliva deposition is inversely related to the length of your smoke.

Disclaimer: It may go against the rules, hence some amount of discretion is called for.

Caution: Black tongue is a dead give away, and may land you in the gaol.

 

[cortezattic]

I'm nowhere near being a competition level slow smoker -- nor do I think I would want to be.

But I have always thought that compressing the tobacco with your fingers to simulate a flake texture,

and then packing that plug loosely, could increase your duration like a folded flake. Worth a try, IMO.
Our own moderator, Lawrence, has written extensively on smoking competition in his blog, Dottlediggers.

 

[lordofthepiperings]

Not sure I could help with reaching three hours of smoking one bowl. I'm getting more consistant with getting through a smoke without relights but, the only time I come close to a two hour smoke is with a Black Cavendish blend in my bigger bowl.

 

[mso489]

The science of keeping a pipe lit for hours is interesting -- big pipe, slow burning tobacco, highly controlled breath and very soft

and slow puffs, and probably much more. Keep your hand off the bowl to keep the temperature down? Just a theory. Move as

little as possible to keep the cross-draft off the top of the bowl. Probably some pipes burn cooler than others, and some very cool,

so that's the one you want.
All that said, I wouldn't want to get into a competition. So much of what we do is competition -- even just getting in line at the grocery --

so a pipe seems like a legitimate escape from that mode of thought. Pipe smoking is more like listening to music or meditating.

But hey, this is the battle of the bands, so good luck! The science of it is fascinating. Tell us how you do.

 

[bigboi]

3 hours 8O. Well I have no advice but I wish you good luck

 

[easterntraveler]

That is awesome that fact that you actually go and not come in last is great. Much respect for your efforts. Try talking to the guy and see if he can give you some tips.

 

[judcole]

Good luck! I haven't done one of those in years. Personal best was around 75 minutes, IIRC.