Why so many pipes?

[Jimmy_Jack]

My son asked me last night, “Dad why do you have so many pipes?”

My initial response was to call him a spy and turn coat. I accused him of acting on behalf of his mother…my wife.

After seeing his puzzled look, I explained as such.

“Imagine your drinking cups are made of wood. You have the choice to drink orange juice, milk, tea and water from that same cup over time. You may wipe it down but you don’t really give a good thorough washing.

Or you could have one cup for each of those drinks. The flavors wouldn’t mix. Would you like one cup, or a few to drink from?”

He said “ewww” and that he’d like more than one cup. Then I told him this was no concern of a child like him at the age of 5 and accused him of dipping into my scotch because it’s tastes watered down. I’ve suspected this for some time. Questioning me now about my pipes has me thinking I’m on the right path.

He muttered something under his breath and rolled over to sleep.

unbelievable..

 

[hoosierpipeguy]

He's clearly become an emissary for your wife. You need to take him fishing, play pitch and catch and other fatherly things before it is too late. This could evolve to where he frequently inventories your tobacco cellar. This could even evolve to extortion. You see where I'm going with this. Take action before it is too late and reverse this seemingly innocent behavior.

 

[OzPiper]

Do a Harris (@cigrmaster ) - teach him/bribe him to clean them for you.

 

[Waning Embers]

I've been working my number down. Too much clutter.

 

[Simmerdown☕️]

I've been working my number down. Too much clutter.

You better never part with the Weavers. ️

 

[OzPiper]

I've been working my number down. Too much clutter.

Let me know. I'll send a skip to your address

 

[Waning Embers]

You better never part with the Weavers. ️

Never will, nor the meers, anything from Jason, or one particular Savinelli 904.

 

[Eye-level]

I'd been like hey why do you have so many legos, hot wheels, and Pokémon cards??? Lol

 

[monty55]

Great story, and you wrote it so well. Kudo's to you... and your son!

 

[Grangerous]

I'd been like hey why do you have so many legos, hot wheels, and Pokémon cards??? Lol

Lego’s Need Warning Labels. They are known to the State of California…

 

[Sweet Home Alabama]

My grandfather used to say that children should be seen and not heard. Also, do as I say, not as I do. I never agreed with either.

We all have to decide how to enjoy a hobby. I have certainly obsessed with motorcycles, musical instruments, camping and whitewater equipment. I remember when the children were in their early teens and I discovered I had $30K tied up in Harley Davidson motorcycles. Within six months they were gone. For one thing I didn't want my son to be riding the Sportster. I took the money and used it partially to purchase their first car. They got their degress without student debt. There was no hobby more important to be than their education.

Tobacco is an addictive substance, and we all know it is not good for you. You'll have to decide how to communicate this to your child.

 

[cosmicfolklore]

I just explained to my children that whoever has the most pipes when they die, WINS!!! This, they understood. It's important that they understand that winners have value, and losers don't matter.

I am kidding of course. I'm sure someone out there cares about losers. Walmart... Walmart cares about losers... and Dollar General. Dollar stores love losers.

 

[timt]

It's easy to overthink this. No one really questions either of my disorders, tobacco or pipes. Why? It's a little unnerving to think people just casually understand that I'd behave this way.

 

[cosmicfolklore]

I know a guy in NC, who has a yard full of wheel barrows. I drive by his place frequently, and I aske him if he just buys a new one each year, and he walked me around to his back yard, and it was full of wheel barrows. It didn't make a lot of sense to me, but he said that he just likes wheel barrows.

Some guys just need one pipe; some people like thousands of wheel barrows. I don't see a problem with it.

 

[cigrmaster]

Do a Harris (@cigrmaster ) - teach him/bribe him to clean them for you.

One weekend soon I am telling my boys they need to spend a few hours cleaning pipes. They are happy to see I have moved almost 60 pipes and they also know I keep my pipes very clean so there is not too much to do outside using everclear on them.

 

[Sweet Home Alabama]

Never had the children clean the motorcycles, hiking boots, boats, or change strings on the guitars.

 

[mso489]

I'll leave family politics alone, except to say that the kid probably came up with the question on his own. Kids are question machines, and usually their questions are really good, if difficult or impossible to answer.

So, why do I have so many pipes. Simple answer, I like to smoke a variety of pipes. More honest answer, they are little art pieces and fetish items that are endlessly pleasing, like chess pieces, watches, and pocket knives, beyond just their use. And finally, they are within reach, in terms of price, as self-rewards and celebrations that give life a little color and enliven the day.

 

[anotherbob]

I'll leave family politics alone, except to say that the kid probably came up with the question on his own. Kids are question machines, and usually their questions are really good, if difficult or impossible to answer.

So, why do I have so many pipes. Simple answer, I like to smoke a variety of pipes. More honest answer, they are little art pieces and fetish items that are endlessly pleasing, like chess pieces, watches, and pocket knives, beyond just their use. And finally, they are within reach, in terms of price, as self-rewards and celebrations that give life a little color and enliven the day.

sure, but why?

 

[anotherbob]

You should have told him all dads have a bunch of pipes. The ones that don't aren't dads they're step dads but they get mad when you talk about it. Dangerously mad like little kids disappear forever kind of mad.
There may be a reason I don't have kids.

 

[Sweet Home Alabama]

You should have told him all dads have a bunch of pipes. The ones that don't aren't dads they're step dads but they get mad when you talk about it. Dangerously mad like little kids disappear forever kind of mad.
There may be a reason I don't have kids.

I am delighted you have no children in your life, Bob. ?