I have developed the habit of hovering the flame 1/4” or so above tobacco as I draw, moving over the chamber until tobacco ignites “on its own”.
Unless necessary after tamping the expanded tobacco, I don’t do a “true light” to follow. If it’s necessary, the second light is multiple short draws (rather than one long forceful draw) to really get things going.
Keep on keeping on, you will find your way (or not). I’m sure that back in the day most all of this was figured out without the support group of thousands online.
That’s is not to say the good stuff online should be ignored, just to reiterate that the learning comes from doing and paying attention to what works and what doesn’t work for you.