Found A Margate Review That's Really Entertaining

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May 9, 2018
1,687
86
Raleigh, NC
I was stumbling through TR's site a couple of weeks ago when I fell upon a review for Margate (and kind of Penzance at the same time) that was so entertaining I just had to share it:
A TWIN REVIEW BY COMPARISON:
Margate is a maiden while Penzance is a matriarch. "Margate is to the morning, what Penzance is to the evening." These two are exotic, loving, sister-wives to be sure, but only "just." Both are lady-like in that neither will reward you with their secret dainties unless treated with dignity and respect. However, approached with gentle hands and patience, they will both yield their hidden delights and favor you with their mysterious and oriental treasures. I love both of these, my Macedonian wives. Esoterica has a harem of these ladies, and Penzance and Margate are the most favored women among them. Once you have been seduced by both, you cannot do without either. All others pale in comparison.
Upon opening, both have a fragrance that tantalize the senses with veiled promises of things to come. Upon lighting, wait for them to warm until they unfold with that soft, unique, slipstream fragrance that you long for. The lingering, haunting, room aroma is uniquely "Esoterica". From there, and until the end of the experience, there is nothing else that compares. It is Beulah Land!
So what then is the difference? Well it is subtle but real. Margate is a tad crisper, tangier, while Penzance is softer, more mature and deeper. The first is a tease, while the latter is a lover. Again, "Margate is to the morning, what Penzance is to the twilight, the evening, and the black and dark night." Like virtuous women, they are hard to come by, but well worth the wait. If you find them, keep them. They are faithful to their man. Four heavenly stars! Enjoli' !!!
It had me cracking up, that's for sure. This dude gets +1 times infinity fro me.

 
This type of review are the only ones I pay attention to. I totally understand the need for the more objective Jiminks type of reviews, but I prefer to do my own observations of flavor. I, generally, just use the review sites to note what type of tobacco something is. But, these... pure entertainment, and makes scrolling through reviews worth it.

 

rfernand

Part of the Furniture Now
Oct 2, 2015
669
39
I think I am glad the reviewer chose not to extend his analogies to describe the moisture left in the aftermath. Or maybe it would have been hilarious. We’ll never know.

 

bassbug

Lifer
Dec 29, 2016
1,112
905
Some people really do take this pipe smoking thing seriously.
You can change the subject in the following sentence to suit your needs, but I am reminded of a saying we have in flyfishing.
"Flyfishing is not a matter of life and death. It is far more important than that"

 

bassbug

Lifer
Dec 29, 2016
1,112
905
Don't you think that to take time and compose such purple prose shows more than a casual interest?
Just sayin'

 
Jan 28, 2018
12,952
134,607
66
Sarasota, FL
I don't find the 2 blends that similar but it was and interesting and entertaining review. I think it exhibits the enjoyment this reviewer is having from smoking their pipe. Which is awesome.

 

npod

Lifer
Jun 11, 2017
2,942
1,024
I'll translate it into Southern for y'all.
Margate ... It's Good, Gone Get Sum!

 

npod

Lifer
Jun 11, 2017
2,942
1,024
I hear you Cosmic. But let's agree that any astute and articulate Southerner knows the lost art of communicating with as few words as possible. That is what made southern writers so successful! I'm still in training.

 

josephcross

Part of the Furniture Now
Dec 30, 2015
963
93
Anthony had started a thread a while back about these types of humorous/entertaining reviews, have to try and dig that one up again...

 

brian64

Lifer
Jan 31, 2011
9,602
14,666
This dude gets +1 times infinity fro me.
I would think posting a loving review of Esoterica blends would be a plank-walkin' offense aboard the Frigate.
Some people really do take this pipe smoking thing seriously.
I would argue that "technical" reviews are just as serious, if not more so.
But I'm not sure serious is the best term, although it's not inappropriate. It's no different than connoisseurs of fine wines.

 

redglow

Lifer
Jan 7, 2019
1,822
4,043
Michigan
Those are the kind of reviews I enjoy reading! The earthy, stewed fruit, figgy notes are all well and good and have there place.
However, I like the more entertaining, creative descriptions!

 
May 9, 2018
1,687
86
Raleigh, NC
I would think posting a loving review of Esoterica blends would be a plank-walkin' offense aboard the Frigate.
Hey now, never said it was meant to be a loving review of another blend as much as the way the review was written. Now I be consumed with a burnin' desire to write a fond review o tha Frigate!

 
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