A Sad Post

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lochinvar

Preferred Member
Oct 22, 2013
1,629
1,214
Not knowing your exact situation, I've been right there, almost the exact time length too. It hurt so much inside it physically hurt. And every second of pain and misery was worth it for what I have now. I have a wife that cares about me, and children I love more than breathing. People deserve to be with someone who cares enough at least to not take the walk. Keep moving forward, do things that make you happy, and let time work.I hope it gets better soon for you.
 

karam

Preferred Member
Feb 2, 2019
1,193
4,642
Basel, Switzerland
Sorry to hear that man. No need to worry about tobacco, it will come back, thankfully I'm great with my wife, but bad breakups when I was younger and softer which brought me where nothing tasted like anything, even trying to binge on my favourite foods to drown the pain made me want to puke on the first bite.

You'll be fine in time, likely much better, it's all life experience.
 

Chasing Embers

Captain of the Black Frigate
Nov 12, 2014
30,175
47,320
38.0565° N, 83.9433° W
Be strong and move on. Time doesn't heal, it just weakens the blow. Twenty-six years ago my first wife ended her life after six months of marriage and it's something I've yet to and will likely never get over. I found a like minded woman years later to start a family with but it's less marriage and more like good friends. Sometimes you just have to put the pieces back together as best as they will fit and press forward.
 

Effortlessdepths

Senior Member
Feb 7, 2020
442
929
It will probably take some time to adjust to the new normal in your life. Do you have people you can trust in your life that can come along side you and be your friend during this time?
Yes. Things could be worse, but our tale is long and complex. We were on the precipice of actually breaking through our problems together, but only a moment too late. This is not an exaggeration or wishful thinking. That's why it's so hard. We were so close.
 

chopper

Preferred Member
Aug 24, 2019
1,163
2,372
Life sucks . . . then . . . this too shall pass.

Sorry you're going through this.

My sons mother walked out when I was told I needed a spinal fusion.
At the time my son hadn't yet turned 1yo.
My back was so rooted that I could barely walk. I was in agony.

Then I went through Hell.
Basically I married a real bitch. The things she did to me; I couldn't believe that someone I loved and had looked after "better than any one ever" [Her words] was like a sledgehammer blow to the guts.
Couldn't believe it was happening.

It's a very lonely time because one can't share the pain. No one can make one 'feel better'.
Despite the tv ads telling men to "reach out", no one wants to see a grown man depressed.

If you need to talk to someone then seek out a good counsellor.
In the meantime, you just have to ride it out man. You're in a storm.

Then, this too shall pass.
You'll be fine in the long run.
 

mso489

Preferred Member
Feb 21, 2013
35,571
34,961
Don't be afraid to talk to someone, a pro. Clergy if that's your culture. Depression can be dangerous. I'm not one for "analysis." But about fifteen years ago, everything went to hell. I'd lost my wife to an illness. The first major dust-up at my job caused endless disruption. A person I was eventually dating had dumped me. So I just went in for inspection and maintenance, like checking the air in your tires or your the oil in your car. I felt like I was doing okay, but I wanted to hear some else with some objectivity tell me that. I did a few sessions, and usefully sorted things out with myself, and felt it was entirely worthwhile, though I was amused by the cardboard box full of puppets the guy had in his office for patients who were kids. I always wanted to grab two and do a puppet show. Then he would have wanted to schedule a weekly session.
 
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