Past Experience?

nhpro · Jan 5, 2016

Hi All,

I am going to put this out there for feedback from those who have experience or knowledge with this sort of thing, because quite frankly I don't get it.
I smoke very infrequently (2 bowls a week, and only at work, never at home or in my car.

But my wife doesn't want me to smoke at all, her father smoked cigarettes and wasn't a very nice guy some times.

My wife has actually stated that it causes her trauma to know that I smoke.
Does anyone have experience with this sort of thing, and suggestions for me?

I enjoy the pipe and don't want to give it up, but if it is causing my wife actual trauma, I would.
Thank you

warren · Jan 5, 2016

Find something else to enjoy. You're out nothing and your wife doesn't have to fret.

captainprophesy · Jan 5, 2016

one of two choices... give up smoking or give up the wife. I don't see any compromise if she's traumatized just knowing that you smoked during the day.

sjfine · Jan 5, 2016

I am no psychologist, but it seems to me that your wife's association of smoking with her trauma is something that she should deal with. Is it not conceivable that it is a form of PTSD? She can be treated, and whether you agree to stop smoking or not, it seems to me that it could do no harm for her talk to someone.

mothernaturewilleatusallforbreakfast · Jan 5, 2016

I would continue to smoke and tell my wife to stop projecting her daddy issues on to me. She's playing the victim to get you to stop. Otherwise, find something you want her to give up that she enjoys and ask her to quit doing it, and make sure you let her know it causes you trauma.

cosmicfolklore · Jan 5, 2016

+1 Warren. I have been smoking since I was 14 years old, and that was back before Bog Tobacco admitted that smoking was related to disease. Don't start. I mean, if you are going to ignore common sense and do it anyways, enjoy it. But, if I had it all to do over again, I wouldn't start smoking ANYTHING. And, especially if it caused problems with my wife. ESPECIALLY.
But, us humans are idiots. You'll probably make the stupid decision and join us fools and morons out here smoking our death blends and throwing money to the wind. But, we are happy imbeciles, and I'll save you a place here on the bench next to me, when you get ready to join us. : puffy

:

nhpro · Jan 5, 2016

Thanks everyone for your advice.
I figured those who smoke a pipe would understand the enjoyment factor and I needed your perspective on this.

Warren, your advice made the most sense to me, thank you sir, and sj thanks as well, it does no harm for the both of us to talk this over with a trained professional first.
-Happy New Year

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