Wow this guy really needs to see a doctor. I know its just a review but he has some deep seated feelings!!!! This was taken off the Tobacco Reviews.
As I take a puff of 1792 I am i am whisked away to a time that is much simpler that this one. A time with out the hub-ub of huge cities. A time where a man shaved the traditional way. A time when you could strike a woman for her insolence and it was okay. A time before the races mixed. And a time when you could still own other people. I'm taken back to 1792.
As I take more puffs I experience the same feeling that the founding fathers had when they doctored the Declaration of Independence and the Bill of Rights. That same wonderful feeling that lets you say "All men are created equally" yet at the same time still own hundreds of slaves and be fathering children with them and not see any hypocrisy in your life style. The same feeling that makes you okay with building a country on Christian principals and at the same time, commit adultery on your wife 1000 times over!
As I reach the middle of the bowl I am reminded of how pleasant it is to be with the Whores of the 18th Century and how great the brothels must have been that helped release the stress of the men who built this fine country such as George Washington and Benjamin Franklin.
My senses are then further entreated when the bowl becomes so strong. The tobacco seems to take on emotion. Emotion similar to the emotion Aaron Burr must have felt when he murdered Alexander Hamilton in semi-cold blood. Back when you could duel your enemy, pretend to be a gentleman about it, but just shoot him in the face and blow him away rather than do the social acceptable thing and fire above his head. The same raw EMOTION that let us pour boiling hot tar all over naked, kidnapped British officials that were just doing their jobs.
Oh how it made me long to be back in the days where children were seen and not heard. Where voting was left to the MEN and when women knew their rightful place; in the kitchen NOT smoking a pipe. How it made me yearn to be back 200 years ago when getting away with murder would have been so easy with all that we know now! Oh and how I would have MADE IT with the ladies; with all the advanced techniques that 200 years brings of collective male knowledge brings! I could have been a pimp!
As the bowl began to finish it was grand. It was as if I was breathing the same smoke that the patriots breathed when they decided to make war against the strongest empire in the world just to prove a point. It was as if Ben Franklin was teaching me how to choose a mistress and cheat on my wife right before my very eyes rather than me reading it in his letter " Advice to a Young Man on the Choice of a Mistress".
As the bowl ended so did my "trip" back in time. I came back to reality where I can't hit my wife or kids. A place where smokers are treated like second class citizens when really women should be treated that way. I'm brought back to a time when my children cannot be beat as they should be. I'm brought back to reality and my day dream is over... until next time when I light up with 1792
Wait untill Cyndi reads this one, LOOK out. She will tell it like it is. Go get em girl!
