New Pipe Problems

oldseadog · Feb 23, 2016

Ok, my adult son bought me a pipe as a gift. It's something I personally would never smoke. It's plastic 100% with a metal lining. I only smoke it when he comes over to visit. I get tounge bit. No flavors to enjoy. Has anyone used a pipe like this? I want to chuck it but I don't want to have my kid think I don't care about his gift. If anyone can give advice on this type of pipe let me know.
Capitalization Fixed- Zack

drwatson · Feb 23, 2016

Tough one! I have seen them, but never used one. I would say just keep doing what you are doing and only use it when he comes around. Go fishing with him and accidently drop it in water.

zack24 · Feb 23, 2016

Keep it on the shelf and find yourself a good briar or at least a corncob to enjoy...and Welcome to the forum!

mso489 · Feb 23, 2016

Nothing like that, but I have been given two pipes from third world areas that are made entirely of wood and are lined with tin can metal. I'm not sure if this is the pipe smoked by the locals, or if this is an item made for tourists just to turn a buck. I keep them as curiosities, but will not smoke them. I think the wood might catch fire, and I don't know what's in the tin-can metal. Haitian and Brazilian pipes these are. I'd be wary of the plastic pipe. You don't want to be smoking plastic, or inhaling what it emits when heated up, even on occasion. You could brandish and admire it when your son is around, but smoke something else. But over time, I'd retire it from view.

mso489 · Feb 23, 2016

... I had a colleague who was a geneticist who would throw a tantrum if the cafeteria people wrapped his sandwiches in clear wrap before heating it in a steamer. He'd angrily shout "Monomers! Monomers!" The cafeteria people had no idea what he meant, but monomers are small molecules that can attach to cells, that he felt might get into his digestive system and into his cells and cause disease. His way of expressing this was eccentric, but I think he had a valid question, at least.

captainprophesy · Feb 23, 2016

I don't see a problem with talking to him... just explain to him that although you greatly appreciate the gesture, explain to him what makes a good pipe to you.
oh and welcome to the forums.

cosmicfolklore · Feb 23, 2016

I like the fishing trip idea, "oops!"

But, it could also be a teachable moment. Show him the difference between a briar pipe and that one, and explain why you are going to display it on your rack, but not smoke it. Who knows, he may have bought one for himself and thinks that smoking it is exactly like what you do, which could be bad for him, as MSO has explained.
And, welcome to the forums!

oldseadog · Feb 23, 2016

<p>Thanks my go to pipe is a Missouri Meerschaum. But he bought it for me it looks cool nice billiard bowl and bent. Just taste like burning plastic and wet tobacco yuck. I do like the fishing trip idea

frozenchurchwarden · Feb 23, 2016

The only case where I can think of a plastic pipe being worth keeping is if it's a "The Pipe", which has a graphite bowl in a plastic body.

http://www.thepipe.info/info/index.html#shape
Still an acquired taste though, maybe try to get him to smoke it and see if he likes it.

oldseadog · Feb 23, 2016

I broke down and asked him how much did he pay for it? Three dollars new. Even my first Dr Grabow was better than this pipe

buroak · Feb 24, 2016

That pipe needs to be lost at sea. Actually, it needs to go to a landfill. Plastic waste in oceans seems to be a concern.

jvnshr · Feb 24, 2016

Go fishing with him and accidently drop it in water.

What if he buys a new one after that?

And welcome to the forum, sir.

sean81 · Feb 24, 2016

Perhaps you can take him to your local B&M and look at pipes together. Teach him about the pipes. Maybe he'll realize the mistake and relieve you of the burden of having to smoke the one he got you. Plus, you have the added bonus of finding a new pipe (together with your son) to replace the one he purchased.

newbroom · Feb 24, 2016

It's the thought that counts. Use it like a trophy and put it on display.

If you're comfortable with asking him the price, you should be comfortable explaining why you would rather not smoke it.

How old is this young man?

If he can purchase a pipe, he probably can research them a little.

Probably saw it on the counter at the convenience store? "Hey!" "THAT'S what I'll get Dad."

My brother made me a pipe. I'd lured him into the attempt and when he came to visit at a family gathering I'd brought it along to show the rest of the clan.

He looked it over, and seemed surprised that it remained unsmoked.

I told him, well, it really isn't well made as a pipe and to smoke it might work, but to clean it would be easier to make a new pipe. NO, I didn't say that.

I did say that it seemed to have a less than functional drilling.

He seemed a bit miffed, but I'm not sure if it's because I didn't smoke it, or my 'critique'.

He's coming again this weekend. Who knows? He may have gone home and read and watched all the crap I sent him to entreaty him into the craft, and show up with some fine examples of his development?

Honesty is the best policy, if it isn't used as a cudgel. I mean, sheesh, we all have feelings, most of us.

halfy · Feb 24, 2016

Teach your kid to smoke a pipe. He'll know everything!
Welcome aboard!

cortezattic · Feb 24, 2016

The whole thing is your fault, Oldseadog!

Apparently, the kid has never heard of Dunhill. :lol:

Train up a child in the way he should go,

And when he is old he will not depart from it.
-- Proverbs 22:6

fordm60 · Feb 24, 2016

Sound like a green tobacco pipe lol. Who else would use it? I am in the tell him you love the gesture but it is not a good pipe. Explain what a good pipe is and then display the plastic one only. The kid bought you a pipe so he loves you, just help him understand what a good pipe is, maybe let him smoke the horrible one and a good one so he sees the difference.

aldecaker · Feb 24, 2016

"Even my first Dr. Grabow..." Blasphemer!

mawnansmiff · May 5, 2016

Go fishing with him and accidently drop it in water.
Surely if it's a plastic pipe it will float.
He will then jump into the water to bravely retrieve the pipe and in so doing will imbue the pipe with yet more sentimental value. Bad idea methinks.
Best just to come clean and tell him he bought a duffer.
Regards,
Jay.

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