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So yesterday was my 6 month follow-up for my sugar diabetes. Did my blood work last week and mentally reviewed my diet and exercise regimen over the past 6 months. Let's see, cheeseburgers, hoagies, beef, pasta, artisan breads, occasional ice cream, cake and pie. Pretty much my only exercise was shoveling snow this winter. Drinking, you bet, scotch, wine beer and close to Aqua Velva a couple of times.
So I'm expecting to get an "F" for this marking period.
Doc comes in, sits down and opens his computer and says, " Liver and kidney functions normal, cholesterol looks good and the A1C is 6.0. I'm thinking about taking you off the diabetes medication. Continue with what your doing as it seems to be working."
I say, "Aye, aye captain."
Then the talk got serious. I told him that Barbara, my wife, has been busting my balls about a prostate exam because my friend Brad just found out he has prostate cancer. Very early stage so he's going to be fine.
The docs thinks this is a fine idea too.
So, I drop trou and bend over the table. The doctor puts on the gloves and then places a box of tissues on the table next to me. Being curious I asked him just how deep he thought he needed to go if I'm going to be crying. He thought that was a good one and now I'm sweating bullets and cussing my wife. He explained that the tissues were for me to "clean up" the lubricant when he was done. Kind of like the guys at Jiffy Lube when they wipe their hands and then whistle while looking at your undercarriage.
I purposely didn't eat before my appointment figuring I'd give him a clear shot at the target. Bull's eye on the first try. Good news is that my prostate is fine; the bad news is he didn't even offer to buy me dinner. I spent the rest of the afternoon walking around with well lubed squishy cheeks.
So we agreed to a next visit just before Christmas. I'll bring cookies this time since now I feel like we're almost dating
So I'm expecting to get an "F" for this marking period.
Doc comes in, sits down and opens his computer and says, " Liver and kidney functions normal, cholesterol looks good and the A1C is 6.0. I'm thinking about taking you off the diabetes medication. Continue with what your doing as it seems to be working."
I say, "Aye, aye captain."
Then the talk got serious. I told him that Barbara, my wife, has been busting my balls about a prostate exam because my friend Brad just found out he has prostate cancer. Very early stage so he's going to be fine.
The docs thinks this is a fine idea too.
So, I drop trou and bend over the table. The doctor puts on the gloves and then places a box of tissues on the table next to me. Being curious I asked him just how deep he thought he needed to go if I'm going to be crying. He thought that was a good one and now I'm sweating bullets and cussing my wife. He explained that the tissues were for me to "clean up" the lubricant when he was done. Kind of like the guys at Jiffy Lube when they wipe their hands and then whistle while looking at your undercarriage.
I purposely didn't eat before my appointment figuring I'd give him a clear shot at the target. Bull's eye on the first try. Good news is that my prostate is fine; the bad news is he didn't even offer to buy me dinner. I spent the rest of the afternoon walking around with well lubed squishy cheeks.
So we agreed to a next visit just before Christmas. I'll bring cookies this time since now I feel like we're almost dating
