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Life

(57 posts)
  • Started 2 years ago by jwlinder111
  • Latest reply from jpmcwjr
  1. User has not uploaded an avatar

    jwlinder111

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    I know this has absolutely nothing to do with pipes or anything else for that matter I just don't know where else to reach to I tried calling a close family friend I tried calling a concern hotline and both told me to call back later they were both busy so I come here. I am so sick with life anymore I don't know what to do anymore my relationship is failing I've been out of work for nine weeks and am so behind I'm bout to lose everything I'm a terrible father I literally don't know what else to do my girl knows I am not happy with some things but knows not that I just want to kill my self I litter ally just can't do it I don't know where I've gone so wrong in my life yes I haven't been the best man but I do understand why everything had to go this way I'm so stressed out with bills and my girls mom and her baby daddy with court and bills and everything I just can't do it anymore and don't know what will fix it. I'm sorry for bringing this onto y'all I just know not where to turn for any help

    Posted 2 years ago #
  2. didimauw

    didimauw

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    You need to smoke more my friend...we have all been there. Keep ur head up. Life really sucks sometimes but you gotta keep going.

    "I don't know half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve."
    Posted 2 years ago #
  3. didimauw

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    I lost my dad, then my best friend, then my mom and my child hood dog all in a 3 year period. You need to stay strong.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  4. warren

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    Too bad "The Possum" passed, there's a hit country song in that story.

    A man without a shillelagh is a man without an expedient.
    Posted 2 years ago #
  5. pipedreamin

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    First off, NEVER do anything rash over money or lack of it. It isn't worth it, as a matter of fact, it isn't worth anything.

    Communicate with your creditors, send them a pittance but send something, regularly, till work flow picks up, and it will.

    Terrible fathers aren't reflective enough to consider the notion they may be terrible fathers. The fact you think yourself one most likely means you aren't.

    You're in the fire man, and what is essential cannot be destroyed by it. Plod onward, make some changes to simplify, the going will get easier. That's what this game is all about.

    Posted 2 years ago #
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    jwlinder111

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    I can only beg for so long I can only plead I am losing everything and without it I am not and deserve nothing I'm so lost I don't know what to even feel anymore

    Posted 2 years ago #
  7. dottiewarden

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    Get help immediately. This is serious and spiraling out of control.

    Dot
    Posted 2 years ago #
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    jwlinder111

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    Where do I get the help where do I turn what do I do I have hit a wall and don't know how to get back

    Posted 2 years ago #
  9. dottiewarden

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    Only an experienced professional can help you.

    Posted 2 years ago #
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    Anonymous

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    My friend the fine folks on this forum can give you encouragement but you need family support and professional help. Contact family members immediately and keep calling that crisis line. They're not going to be busy for good. Do you go to church? If you do...contact your pastor and if you don't have a church look one up. A lot of them have hotlines too. If you tell us what city you're in I'll be glad to look some up for you. In the meantime take a deep breath and try to relax. There ARE people in this world that care about you!

    Posted 2 years ago #
  11. brudnod

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    There are 2 posts with "Life" as the thread. Look at the other one for more constructive support.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  12. aeropuffer

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    If you are a veteran, then call the V.A. They will help.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  13. pitchfork

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    jwlinder111,

    The most important thing for you to do -- RIGHT NOW -- is to talk to someone and tell them why you're depressed and having thoughts of suicide. Do you have a friend you can call? Or a parent? Or a sibling? It doesn't matter, but the first, best step is to talk to someone -- anyone -- and tell them what you're going through.

    In the U.S., you can also call these folks -- the only reason they exist is to take phone calls from people like you and get them help.
    http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org
    1-800-273-TALK (8255)

    Posted 2 years ago #
  14. jerwynn

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    jwlinder111 PLEASE take some of the above suggestions and get professional or familial or personal or religious help ASAP.

    I have been to the severe extreme edge myself several times, my family roots have terrible histories of major depressive disorders, as I do myself.

    I've learned two things and survive(d):

    One is that no matter how bad the terrible agonizing despair is, IT WILL PASS!! EVERY dmn time. And it has and does. The regret that would fill the void of a life taken to soon is irretractable.

    The other thing is this: "suicide only happens when ones suffering overwhelms ones coping resources". This, to me, has become a clarion call to beef up coping resources INSTEAD of killing myself. And it has come many ways, loving family doctor, cognitive behavioral therapist, psychiatric specialists, dear friends and family, books, spirituality, diet, exercise... there are a million things that can help beef up ones coping resources... they are all better than the alternative. Please receive the blessing in my tagline. You are loved... people care!

    “Deep peace of the running wave to you.
 Deep peace of the flowing air to you.
 Deep peace of the quiet earth to you.
 Deep peace of the shining stars to you.
    Deep peace of the infinite peace to you." - Fiona Macleod
    Posted 2 years ago #
  15. hakchuma

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    I suggest you watch this video right here my friend.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RjudO5Xfibc

    "From tempers be it known that we are warm in the fields of battle and cool in the hours of debate"

    - Pushmataha, Choctaw Chief
    Posted 2 years ago #
  16. grouchydog

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    Take no action for the next 24 hours. That's it - 24 hours. Then commit to another 24 hours and repeat. Do not think beyond 24 hours at this point.

    Make a list - WRITE IT ON PAPER - of the people who would be hurt if you took drastic action. Be honest, be real - you will know who would be devastated. Parents, grandparents (I don't know your age), uncles & aunts, children, cousins, grandchildren, friends, coworkers, and on and on. The list will likely be longer that you imagine at first thought. That has been a huge help to me. Above all, you have a daughter who needs (and wants, but primarily NEEDS) her daddy.

    I've been there, and very recently. I am learning to take life one hour, one minute, one breath at a time - during times like this, that must be sufficient.

    And as recommended, get professional help from wherever you can find it, regardless of financial issues. Online forum members can provide some advice, but you need face-to-face counsel with someone who's trained and experienced with what you're feeling.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  17. perdurabo

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    It fucking sucks, but hey it can only get better. The struggle will teach you to dig yourself out of these holes. Women will only drag you back down. When I crawl into that deep dark hole, I only come up to watch the night fall with the rain, but the struggle makes a stronger man.

    It's not my position nor want to help another man. It's his responsibility to help himself, as where he can learn to dig down deep enough to save himself. -I. Kidd
    Posted 2 years ago #
  18. igloo

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    There is only one thing to do . Start over ! It sounds as if your world is going to crumble no matter what you do . Just let it happen . When all the dust settles you can have a fresh start and you will learn what is really important to you . Until then I recommend you see a doctor to get pointed in the right direction .

    “There was an awful suspicion in my mind that I'd finally gone over the hump, and the worst thing about it was that I didn't feel tragic at all, but only weary, and sort of comfortably detached.”
    Posted 2 years ago #
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    smoky

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    Hmm. If the OP is for real, then I say killing yourself is the selfish and easy way out. No one ever said life was going to be easy. I guarantee you many people throughout history have had it a lot tougher than you and pulled through it. If you are a man, then be a damn man and learn to deal with the good and bad in life. That is all.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  20. mcitinner1

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    Smoky that is SO easy for you to say isn't it? you non feeling Ass? You even have a F'ing complaint? Go away!

    Stan
    Godfrey Daniels!!
    The Plenipotent Key to Cope's Correct Card of the Peerless Pilgrimage to Saint Nicotine of the Holy Herb:
    Posted 2 years ago #
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    smoky

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    Ass, huh? I was telling it like it is. Someone should. Suicide is the wrong and selfish way out. Life is hard. Giving up is not the answer. Being a man and dealing with the challenges of life is.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  22. ashdigger

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    Smoky, "telling it like it is?" Not hardly. Clearly you've never been in the hole. Being a "man" is horseshit.

    Ubi Ignis Est?
    Posted 2 years ago #
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    aldecaker

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    +1, Tinner. If nothing more, this thread has helped sort the human beings from the bullshit knuckle-dragging chest beaters on this forum. I don't know if the OP is for real, but I guess we'd better yell, "Jump! Jump!" just in case. Friggin' sick.

    A man who serves his country is a patriot. A man who serves his government is an employee. The two are not always the same thing.
    Posted 2 years ago #
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    Anonymous

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    mcitinner1, well said, I could not have said it better!!

    KEEP ON PUFFING!!!

    Posted 2 years ago #
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    smoky

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    I guess some things will never change around here. As always, someone has an unpopular alternative opinion and everyone piles on with the attacks and criticisms. I never realized telling someone that others have pulled through much worse situations, and to not give up is actually telling them to 'jump'. Lol.

    Yes, Tinner. You have your wish. I will go away.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  26. ashdigger

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    "Unpopular alternative opinion" let's try Bullshit. Sounds easier.

    Posted 2 years ago #
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    smoky

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    Telling someone that others have pulled through much worse situations, and to not give up on life is bullshit? Whatever.

    What's bullshit is the group bully mentality on this site that seems to be encouraged. Don't agree with an unpopular opinion or suggestion? Just pile on the criticisms and attacks to shut them up and drive them away.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  28. ashdigger

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    Well, that's not what you said, but since you need to be right....you win. You've clearly never been there. You toss out selfish like it's a given. If you're in the hole it's relief.

    The OP appears to need help, not a morality lesson that won't HELP.

    Posted 2 years ago #
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    aldecaker

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    There's a way to do that in an encouraging way, and a way to do it in an excoriating, kick a guy while he's down way. You chose the latter, and now you're trying to make it sound differently.

    Posted 2 years ago #
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    smoky

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    Well, that's not what you said, but since you need to be right....you win. You've clearly never been there. You toss out selfish like it's a given. If you're in the hole it's relief.

    The OP appears to need help, not a morality lesson that won't HELP.

    I don't need to be 'right'. I don't care what you think. I gave my honest opinion to the OP and was instantly criticized and attacked for it. Suicide IS selfish. Don't like my opinion? Fine. I could care less. And by the way, no one here knows anything about my personal life to tell me 'you've clearly never been there'. Don't try to judge someone you know nothing about.

    I'm done here.

    Posted 2 years ago #
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    aldecaker

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    Speaking for myself only, I'm basing it on this: absolutely no one could ever have been in that type of position and, regardless of their own outcome, have that shallow and moronic of a lack of empathy for someone else's situation.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  32. prairiedruid

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    Telling someone that others have pulled through much worse situations, and to not give up on life is bullshit? Whatever.

    Actually this is one of the worst things to say to a suicidal person; it belittles and downplays what is a very serious time for this person. I've struggled with clinical depression for over 15 years; meds don't work, therapy didn't work, ECT didn't work so I basically bootstrap my way through the darker times. Focus on one thing that is important to you whether that be a family member, spouse, friend or even a pet and use that to hold on for one more day. Tomorrow if it is still bad do it again. Seek professional help, it didn't work for me but I do know others that swear to it's effectiveness. Good Luck and feel free to PM me if I can be of any help.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  33. zack24

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    I think everyone started with some good advice here for the OP, but once a thread like this starts creating some friction that might exacerbate the original problem, it's a good time to close it down...

    Posted 2 years ago #
  34. ashdigger

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    PrairieDruid, that's my story too. Exactly.

    Posted 2 years ago #
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    Clearly smoky has NO heart. Not like most others within this forum. Smoky, Your TOUGH LOVE TACTIC can actually push someone that's on the edge over the top! What were you thinking? This OP really needed help and hopefully read what others also had too say in the LIFE thread that was closed. Hopefully he received help from friends and family and let's US ALL know how he is doing. You smoky, take a hike!! You need too think before you speak!

    Posted 2 years ago #
  36. mcitinner1

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    Spencer was right about the double thread that was shut down first. It had more of the OP's story, and more helpful info and well meaning thoughts.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  37. smokeyweb

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    Don't hurt yourself, bro. Get help. Call 911 if you feel suicidal. They will take you to the hospital and get you the professional help you need. Nothing is worth killing yourself over. Things will get better. I promise. Your kid needs a father. Suicide is not the answer. Please don't put your family through that pain and suffering.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  38. perdurabo

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    Alternate Opinions do get the shaft around here. I should say opinions get the shaft, but this guy didn't need the Suicide is for Loser routine. You haven't lived until you put the barrel against the head.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  39. perdurabo

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    There is life after these holes we find ourselves in.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  40. pitchfork

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    I guess some things will never change around here. As always, someone has an unpopular alternative opinion and everyone piles on with the attacks and criticisms.

    A) You joined the day before yesterday. B) Why don't you take your own advice, "be a damn man" and stop whining about how someone criticized you.

    Just telling it like it is -- I'm sure you understand.

    Posted 2 years ago #
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    Anonymous

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    Let's all hope and pray the OP received proper help and will be back soon!! Tonight before going to bed we should all say a prayer and keep him in our thoughts as well as our family and friends.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  42. mcitinner1

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    Thank You Pitchfork.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  43. woodsroad

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    Smokey Said:

    "Yes, Tinner. You have your wish. I will go away."

    Well, man up and get on with it already.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  44. ashdigger

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    ^^^ THIS

    Posted 2 years ago #
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    frozenchurchwarden

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    I have absolutely no experience with debt, but I have a lot of fun listening to people who are in debt call into the Dave Ramsey Show on the radio.
    Some of them call back and say they're debt free later, maybe Dave would be the right person to talk to.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  46. warren

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    My position on the post is obvious, I'm not buying into the original post. But I must write, Smokey was waaay off base. Suicide to the deceased was an answer. It's only seen as a selfish act by some next of kin and acquaintances. And, those who have never experienced a suicide close up and personal.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  47. ophiuchus

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    ... I'm not buying into the original post.

    Bingo.
    In the U.S., you can also call these folks -- the only reason they exist is to take phone calls from people like you and get them help.
    http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org
    1-800-273-TALK (8255)

    If this is real, this is a better resource for help.

    A hobbyist bulletin board is not the place to seek meaningful help in this area. In fact, anyone operating on this level of despair would fare better away from the computer and the internet for a while and connect with someone (a professional) face to face, who might recognize things like alcohol/substance abuse or gambling/financial loss of control or clinical factors no one on this board is going to be able to qualify from black and white text.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  48. skraps

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    Amazing how in one keystroke people can go from empathy to attack mode.

    Be kind to everyone, always... even the guy who posted something you don't like. You never know what struggles people have endured or are enduring, regardless of how finely honed your armchair psychiatry skills are.

    "People are not made better by a briar. An idiot before smoking a pipe is still an idiot after smoking a pipe, they're just more likely to speak less drivel with something in their mouth. For that, all society should be grateful."

    - Bob Runowski
    Posted 2 years ago #
  49. perdurabo

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    I think most of us wanted to sleep at night, knowing that the old codger didn't come out and cause someone to do something drastic. It begs to wonder, two post from the gentleman and two threads created. Yet no more responses, from him. Hopefully he sought help elsewhere and will come back and talk about pipes, tobacco, FDA Nanny State Regulations, Big Government/ Big Cigarette love affairs etc....just throwing bones and jabs now.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  50. sjfine

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    @jwlinder111
    I know exactly how you feel. I never really posted anywhere about it (except for an anonymous blog years back), but I have wanted to - many times. I always thought that it would be as useless as everything else.

    I hope I was wrong. I hope posting helped you a little. I hope you can find even more help.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  51. cortezattic

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    A hobbyist bulletin board is not the place to seek meaningful help in this area.

    IMO, ophiuchus' assessment is spot-on. In this day and age it is far more likely that the OP is a con artist.
    It has happened in this forum before -- the "come on" has been different, but generous and sympathetic people here have been taken in.

    Like Warren, I think the whole thing stinks. The thread ought to be closed.
    If indeed the OP needs help, or even a sympathetic ear, let him get it at a more appropriate venue.

    I find myself sitting idly on the line dividing past and future,
    as if I could kill time without injuring eternity. -- Thoreau
    Posted 2 years ago #
  52. perdurabo

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    Poor guy was so beat up, he forgot to add punctuations at the end of sentences.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  53. zack24

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    Whoops...I thought I closed this last night...and we are closing it for all the obvious reasons...

    Posted 2 years ago #
  54. pitchfork

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    Zack, it's still not closed.

    Posted 2 years ago #
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    aldecaker

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    Wow. A thread titled "Life" that refuses to die. There's a creepy message here, somewhere.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  56. newbroom

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    I've known people who did the deed and felt the incredible sense of confused emotion considering the finality of it.

    Whenever we lose a loved one, or 'friend', we lose part of ourselves, no matter how they left us.

    The older I get, the more I seem to lose, making those remaining that much more significant.

    Long live the OP!

    Posted 2 years ago #
  57. jpmcwjr

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    Not closed as of precisely 6:41:19 AM PDT on Friday, August 26, 2016

    I know that you believe you understood what you think I said, but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.
    Posted 2 years ago #

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