I couldn't help myself. It just happened. I was minding my own business, seriously working on keeping my PAD suppressed, when this Nording seduced me. I told myself, no, no, no! Walk away, walk away now! If you buy this and my better half finds out, I will have to move to Chile or Argentina or something and I couldn't even imagine how difficult it would be to get tobacco delivered to Chile. I mean getting tobacco to my home in Central Alberta is difficult enough. But this Nording Moss sitter called to me. I felt myself weakening. "Chris," it called so softly and seductively. Chris, I know you want me. We were made for each other, take me please!" NOOOooooooooooooooooooo!
But it was no use. I thought, I can't afford this. Wait that's why God made MasterCard and besides, I rationalized, you have a firearms safe in your man-cave that has lots and lots of room for hiding contraband. I mean, every pipe smoker knows if you leave pipes unattended they breed at night. It's not uncommon for say a Peterson and a Nording to copulate and to have offspring, and the next time you open your pipe case why, there are a set of twins just sitting there!
I have explained this to my wife on other occasions telling her that I had absolutely no idea how those two new pipes got there but I couldn't remove them from their parents so they would have to stay.
She said, "Chris, you are so full of stuff coming out of the south end of a north bound moose that it's ridiculous." Anyway, I digress. So twenty minutes later I was sitting here staring stupidly at my credit card in my hand reading a, "Thank you for your purchase your shipping confirmation number is blah, blah, blah blah" kind of email and I said, "Oh my God! What have I done!" Then my cunning and devious PAD brain kicked in and I thought, "You're safe, Chris you're safe. It's good. My wife doesn't know a briar from a toothbrush and even though I now have umm, let's say my collection has grown astronomically in the last bit, as long as I smoke one of my briars I'm good, because to her, they are all the same shape and color. She made my Meerschaum last week though. I made the mistake of carrying it up from my man-cave to the garage where I smoke, and she saw the beautiful creamy color of it while I was stroking it whispering, "My precious," and she used an expletive that I won't repeat here because it would offend my pipe smoking brethren s refined sensibilities. I try to be considerate of my fellow pipe smokers. Anyway, my new Nording arrived.
So tell me please, what do I do? Is it OK to keep contraband hidden from your wife if she has no idea that you have more than one pipe? Do I wait six months and then fess up, say at Christmas time when I present her with her gift like a nicely wrapped up band saw? Or do I move somewhere remote with my pipes and tobacco.
I know you guys are wise and experienced controlling your PAD? Please tell me what to do?
Chris in Red Deer, Alberta. Waiting for advice.
But it was no use. I thought, I can't afford this. Wait that's why God made MasterCard and besides, I rationalized, you have a firearms safe in your man-cave that has lots and lots of room for hiding contraband. I mean, every pipe smoker knows if you leave pipes unattended they breed at night. It's not uncommon for say a Peterson and a Nording to copulate and to have offspring, and the next time you open your pipe case why, there are a set of twins just sitting there!
I have explained this to my wife on other occasions telling her that I had absolutely no idea how those two new pipes got there but I couldn't remove them from their parents so they would have to stay.
She said, "Chris, you are so full of stuff coming out of the south end of a north bound moose that it's ridiculous." Anyway, I digress. So twenty minutes later I was sitting here staring stupidly at my credit card in my hand reading a, "Thank you for your purchase your shipping confirmation number is blah, blah, blah blah" kind of email and I said, "Oh my God! What have I done!" Then my cunning and devious PAD brain kicked in and I thought, "You're safe, Chris you're safe. It's good. My wife doesn't know a briar from a toothbrush and even though I now have umm, let's say my collection has grown astronomically in the last bit, as long as I smoke one of my briars I'm good, because to her, they are all the same shape and color. She made my Meerschaum last week though. I made the mistake of carrying it up from my man-cave to the garage where I smoke, and she saw the beautiful creamy color of it while I was stroking it whispering, "My precious," and she used an expletive that I won't repeat here because it would offend my pipe smoking brethren s refined sensibilities. I try to be considerate of my fellow pipe smokers. Anyway, my new Nording arrived.
So tell me please, what do I do? Is it OK to keep contraband hidden from your wife if she has no idea that you have more than one pipe? Do I wait six months and then fess up, say at Christmas time when I present her with her gift like a nicely wrapped up band saw? Or do I move somewhere remote with my pipes and tobacco.
I know you guys are wise and experienced controlling your PAD? Please tell me what to do?
Chris in Red Deer, Alberta. Waiting for advice.