Hat Etiquette for Men

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mso489

Lifer
Feb 21, 2013
41,210
60,454
The recent thread on smoking caps called to mind various points of etiquette, now lost to history as near as I can tell, about the wearing of hats by men. I think the military may still observe some of these, but I suspect they are more permissive than even in the 60's/70's. But just for civilians, men's hats weren't worn indoors in residences, restaurants, theaters, or much of anywhere unless it was a place for people in transit like a railroad station or airport. To go into a good restaurant or even a upscale bar and see men wearing hats at table still gives me a jolt, especially if the men are over a certain age. In the military of yore, you only saluted when "covered," and you were only covered outdoors. Both the man saluting and the recipient had to be covered to give and return a salute. I'm not sure when Presidents took to saluting back the Marine guard at their helicopter door, but the Prez is usually not covered (wearing a hat) so this can only evoke Commander-in-Chief privilege, since as a military man they would have to be covered to return a proper salute. All this is ancient history. Today men wear Stetson hats and ball caps at restaurants dining on white linen tablecloths, where the wait staff incongruously wear black tie and tuxes. Greek fishing caps, watch caps, and other headgear is not uncommon. Younger people just look clueless doing this, but older men look like louts, but this is just my perspective as someone who was born just after the American Revolution. Whatever your age, do you miss manners in the wearing of headgear by men, or are you glad not to bother with it? Or glad not to know about it at all?

 

weezell

Lifer
Oct 12, 2011
13,653
49,165
Can not STAND the crooked or backwards ball cap! Backwards ball cap = a "spoiler" for an idiot. Makes him look stupid faster than anyone else...

 

bcharles123

Starting to Get Obsessed
Mar 18, 2014
236
1
It's a great question. Not so easily answered! I suppose I draw the line at mandatory removal of a hat for the national anthem. Otherwise I'm not too strict and can adopt to the times.

 

shawnofthedead

Starting to Get Obsessed
Jun 5, 2015
249
5
I like to wear baller and homburg. I don't know the specific rules on wearing hats, but I always remove my hat when indoors and when I meet someone. I do hate it when men (or sometimes women) don't remove their headwear indoors.

 

seacaptain

Lifer
Apr 24, 2015
1,829
7
You have a point, and I'm guilty of wearing a ballcap indoors too.
Although I'm not old enough to remember it, I think society was a better place when we had hat etiquette and everyone was expected to wear a hat when out of their home.
Then again, I'd settle for the good old days when department store clerks didn't have neck tattoos, ear gauges, and lip rings.

 

stephenw

Might Stick Around
Nov 14, 2014
99
2
WV
I am almost never without a proper hat (proper hat meaning something other than those Little League ball caps men wear now). I try to observe proper hat etiquette. However, I will not remove my hat when in a place like Wal-Mart of the local 7-11. When I enter a bank, my hat is on until I get up to the teller, then I remove the hat. I have always heard that it is proper to wear a hat when in an office building but you remove the hat once you enter the office you intended to visit. I will remove my hat when entering a restaurant, but in a place like McDonalds, I will leave the hat on until I sit to eat the slop they call food. I have noticed many military men removing their covers even when entering a 7-11 type business.
Anyway, I remove my hat when speaking with another, but will sometimes leave my hat on when I know I will be using my hands for some reason (like shopping). It all depends on the conditions and atmosphere of the place I am visiting.

 

tinsel

Part of the Furniture Now
Oct 23, 2015
531
7
I'm still under 30 myself, but my grandfather taught me all the old-world hat etiquette. I remember the few times I made the mistake of coming into my grandparents' house with my ball cap on as a kid and hearing the booming command "Take you hat off!" if I made it more than a few steps in the door without taking it off. Grandad always wears a cap whenever he isn't in the house and keeps them hanging by the door. The exception to the "no hats in the house" rule is whenever you are working, performing some kind of repair or maintenance, etc, that may involve several trips in and out (working on the plumbing and so forth), and other similar circumstances.
I wear a brimmed hat (a real hat, not a ball-cap) almost always when I'm out and about. Tanning snakeskins is a hobby of mine and all my hats are decorated with copperhead skin bands :). I ALWAYS remove it when entering the door of a building, especially someone's home. The exception to this is large chain stores (walmart, lowes, etc) mainly because I need my hands free to grab what I came for and get out quickly and can't afford to have one hand tied up holding my hat.
Speaking of holding my hat, it does irritate me that people's homes, and businesses (especailly restaurants) don't have hat-racks where you can hang up your hat when you come in. It's especially irritating in restaurants where my hat either has to sit on the table (very bad manners) or take up a whole chair for itself.
Here's another hat etiquette that has been lost to the ages ... "Never touch another man's hat unless he specifically asks you to do so". I would never DREAM of touching a man's hat without his permission, yet I can't count the number of times my hat was sitting on a table or chair and someone just walked up and grabbed it and began inspecting it. They are usually met with a firm "Please dont touch that!" as I snatch it from them. One time I was in a crowded bar with some friends and a fellow that had a few too many walked up and grabbed my hat off the table and put it on his head. I was out of my chair in the blink of an eye and removed it from his head. Luckily my friends (who know how I feel about my hat) saw what was happening and caught me before I unloaded the right cross that was coming next. That guy will probably never know how lucky he got off. I would have gladly spent a night in jail for teaching him some "hat etiquette" that night!
So yes, as a hat-wearer and believer in hat etiquette, I am highly irritated by the lack of it in today's world. And as others have said, I'm especially irritated by backwards/sideways/crooked hats. Also, what's the deal with these guys who leave the tags on a hat? I never understood that either...

 

mayfair70

Lifer
Sep 14, 2015
1,968
2
The only hat I have worn is a winter hat. I remove it when I go inside a building. I have been accused of being old fashioned on a few occasions. I strive to behave as if I were a gentleman with the accompanying politeness and attention to custom, depending on the company I find myself in. I like to see good manners in people and have never considered myself above anyone but the most depraved wretches who are rude and insensitive on purpose, with no regard for others. Seeing these posts, I realize I have no "hat vocabulary" and will be changing that and possibly, just possibly, getting a hat in the future. Thank you, MSO, for this post. It has been illuminating. :puffpipe:

 

mso489

Lifer
Feb 21, 2013
41,210
60,454
tinsel, God bless your Grandad. I think it helps for people to be aware of these "old" rules that introduce some order and courtesy in a chaotic world. I don't want to be intolerant. There is a world of different cultures and standards of behavior that go with them. But that shouldn't encourage abandoning those you or I may have grown up with. I think the amenity of not fiddling with other people's clothing whether it is on or off of them is understood. The idea that someone would do that just sounds creepy. I think a very wide swath of cultures, many of them completely geographically remote and unconnected to each other, would understand that as rudimentary.

 
Sep 27, 2012
1,779
0
Upland, CA.
I for one never wear a hat indoors, i learned it at the age of 5 in the cub scouts. My son who is 16 and loves to wear a ball cap also never wears a hat indoors... Oh and I'm glad to say he never wears a straight brim, he always curves the brim of a cap.

 

sablebrush52

The Bard Of Barlings
Jun 15, 2013
19,747
45,287
Southern Oregon
jrs457.wixsite.com
I've always worn hats, felt or beaver in winter, straw in summer. On when outdoors, off when indoors. Doffed when meeting someone. I have on occasion, worn my hat in a restaurant when there is no place else to put it. Like tinsel I find the lack of hat racks irritating and I'm not leaving a Borsalino on the floor, so get over it. Leaving it on the table is not only considered rude, but also bad luck.

 

puffy

Lifer
Dec 24, 2010
2,511
98
North Carolina
I live in the south.Here a lot of the male species wear caps.I hate it when I see them in restaurants eating with them on.I was always told that shows a lack of respect.

 

seacaptain

Lifer
Apr 24, 2015
1,829
7
All this talk of hat racks, but would anyone really leave an expensive hat on a rack next to a restaurant door? No way I'd do that in today's world.

 

stickframer

Part of the Furniture Now
Apr 11, 2015
875
8
Mso, thanks for this thread.
 I think it helps for people to be aware of these "old" rules that introduce some order and courtesy in a chaotic world.
Not only did my grandpa's live across country, they both passed when I was pretty young, so it's been up to me to learn things like hat etiquette on my own. I agree that these old time rules are important, and I usually follow them, but I sometimes slack off because no one else seems to follow them. And there is a terrible hat rack shortage.
Reminds me, also, that I could use a haircut.

 

jvnshr

Moderator
Staff member
Sep 4, 2015
4,616
3,868
Baku, Azerbaijan
Some restaurants won't allow you to wear a hat while eating. They will insist to take it when you enter to the restaurant.

 

ssjones

Moderator
Staff member
May 11, 2011
18,407
11,294
Maryland
postimg.cc
I was raised by a retired SGM, so my hat generally comes off indoors. There are some times like Sable mentions, where it's not convenient to store it, then it stays on (but I feel guilty...)

 

bigpond

Lifer
Oct 14, 2014
2,019
13
Whatever your age, do you miss manners in the wearing of headgear by men, or are you glad not to bother with it? Or glad not to know about it at all?
Have you considered that hat etiquette is an anachronism best left to the days of starched collars and wool britches? Rather than breech, etiquette has bent to the spirit of the times just like it has on the past. It's natural, I suspect, to malign this in one's dotage and rally for it in youth,

 
I don't own a hat that is so nice that I wouldn't put it on the floor next to me, nor would I go to a place that had nasty floors. But, I don't cast aversions on those that do. Heck, I wish I had a hat that was that nice.

But, when I go somewhere to eat the hat comes off. That's just the way I was programmed. But, I also don't wear ball caps. With my beard, I come across looking more like a serial killer with a ball cap; whereas a nice hat, I just look antiquated. Plus, a hat with a good brim all the way around gives this silvering redhead a little more protection from the blistering sun.

 

bigpond

Lifer
Oct 14, 2014
2,019
13
If these guys can't put a shine on an old coot like you cosmic there's no hope.
http://www.sheepsheep.co.uk/collections/hats

 
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