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Do You have Any Phobias? I Do

(84 posts)
  • Started 2 years ago by indianafrank
  • Latest reply from autumnfog
  1. indianafrank

    indianafrank

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    My phobia is the enema bag.

    I grew up in the 50’s with a mother who had a fondness for giving enemas. Don’t get me wrong, I loved my mother, God rest her soul, but she had this thing about giving me and my siblings enemas.

    My mother wasn’t a cruel person, nope, she was loving and caring. But that damn enema bag turned her into a different person.

    The big red bag hung on the inside of the bathroom door always ready for use. It was the largest enema bag I’d ever seen. You could add gallons of water to that thing. I don’t think they make enema bags that big anymore. If they do, they should be outlawed. It’s a cruel kind of punishment to use enema bags that are that big. If they wanna make enema bags that big, then use them on terrorists when they’re interrogated. Believe me, they’ll talk. When my mother used that big bag on us, we squealed like pigs.

    “Big red” we used to call it. If I or my brother or sisters said we were even a bit not feeling well, mom would scream. “Get in the bathroom.”

    If we just coughed, mom would grab “big red.”

    “But mom. It’s just a cough.”

    “Shut up and get in the bathroom.”

    And when mom gave an enema…it wasn’t just your ordinary enema. Nope, her enemas were legendary. She would use the entire contents of “big read”.

    Yup, enema bags...they’re my phobia.

    I don't know where I'm going...but sooner or later I'll get there.
    Posted 2 years ago #
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    aldecaker

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    Well, now I'm not feeling very well myself...

    A man who serves his country is a patriot. A man who serves his government is an employee. The two are not always the same thing.
    Posted 2 years ago #
  3. woodsroad

    woodsroad

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    I was going to say that I'm afraid of liverwurst, but now... it doesn't seem that important.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  4. mrbigglesworth

    Lee

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    How does one respond to that? I would have a phobia, too, if that were me. God bless you.

    "I don’t want any of your statistics; I took your whole batch and lit my pipe with it." - Mark Twain
    Posted 2 years ago #
  5. cossackjack

    cossackjack

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    Frank, that's disturbing, very disturbing. Sorry that you had to endure such therapy.

    On-the-other-hand,

    If they wanna make enema bags that big, then use them on terrorists when they’re interrogated. Believe me, they’ll talk. When my mother used that big bag on us, we squealed like pigs.

    Water-butting - augmented, deep interrogation. Could this replace Water-boarding?

    "A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly.
    Specialization is for insects!" - Robert Heinlein
    Posted 2 years ago #
  6. drwatson

    drwatson

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    Well I also had one, butt does not compare to your's

    John
    Posted 2 years ago #
  7. orobusto

    orobusto

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    Sounds like my grandmother. Along with the big red enema, she would use homemade foul smelling ointments and poultrices. Luckily my mom would keep me away from her when I was sick. I'm sure my dad had to learn to "go with the flow" when he was a kid though!

    Posted 2 years ago #
  8. dread

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    I was gonna say werewolves, which even if real I don't think could beat your phobia. Close, butt big red wins.

    ". . . I am the master of my fate:
    I am the captain of my soul."
    - INVICTUS
    Posted 2 years ago #
  9. cosmicfolklore

    Cosmic

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    My late wife fretted over whether the babies had pooped, my mom fretted over it with us also, castor oil, blech... My current wife now frets about whether the dog has pooped, "when was the last time someone had seen the cat poop?" I have never understood the female preoccupation with everyone's business.

    Michael
    Posted 2 years ago #
  10. pagan

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    Dude! really?!

    Nowhere in the world will such a brotherly feeling of confidence be experienced as amongst those who sit together smoking their pipes
    Posted 2 years ago #
  11. snowyowl

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    So.
    Is this why hotdogs are so popular (in the subconscious)?!
    What does it say, if I order an "IndianaFrank" with mustard and relish... extra relish?
    Maybe it is all clear now: in the mid-West, hotdogs with catsup (is a thing)...

    "If you see something... pipe up."
    Posted 2 years ago #
  12. akfilm

    akfilm

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    I uh....hmmmm. Nope. Wow.

    That's all. I'm going to finish my coffee and look at the other topics here.

    You have painted such a vivid picture...big red may haunt me now.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  13. brian64

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    Frank, you've truly outdone yourself with this post. It takes a lot of courage to open up about such sensitive matters, but sometimes you just gotta let it all out (no pun intended). And imo, the need for an occasional belt of booze is perfectly understandable when experiencing a PTSD attack from a flashback to a childhood encounter with the "dreaded apparatus".

    Kramer's encounter with big red:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F4vsrBfYx8w

    “Bipartisan usually means some larger-than-usual deception is being carried out.” – George Carlin
    Posted 2 years ago #
  14. kane

    kane

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    Parents can be such a pain in the ass!

    Posted 2 years ago #
  15. davet

    davet

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    Big Red

    Posted 2 years ago #
  16. thomasw

    thomasw

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    rofl @ davet

    After some time he felt for his pipe. It was not broken, and that was something. Then he felt for his pouch, and there was some tobacco in it, and that was something more. Then he felt for matches and he could not find any at all, and that shattered his hopes completely.

    The Hobbit
    Posted 2 years ago #
  17. lasttango

    lasttango

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    Sock Monkeys kind of freak me out... I also have an aversion to people with yogurt in their beards.

    A man that hoards up riches and enjoys them not, is like an ass that carries gold and eats thistles.
    -Richard Burton
    Posted 2 years ago #
  18. davet

    davet

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    Posted 2 years ago #
  19. indianafrank

    indianafrank

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    Am I the only one with a phobia?

    How come no one has admitted to their fear?

    OMG. Am I the only one with a phobia? Great...now I gotta worry about looking like an ass for starting this thread.

    And that creates another phobia.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  20. mrbigglesworth

    Lee

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    I came back to this thread at the end of my day, just for one more good laugh!

    Posted 2 years ago #
  21. woodsroad

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    I'm afraid you're all alone in this.
    Is that a phobia?

    Posted 2 years ago #
  22. drwatson

    drwatson

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    Okay, I have a Granny chin hair and Christmas cookie phobia! One year at one of those Christmas Bazaars, there was a sweet elderly Grandma type person selling these delicious cookies. I looked up and she had Granny chin hairs!! I kept thinking one may have fallen into the cookie dough...Now I can't eat Christmas cookies.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  23. fluffie666

    fluffie666

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    Sorry about your bag phobia. That's harsh. I suppose I have one or ten...

    Every time I see a hat on a bed, I have to make a quick exit (out of the building, house, store or whatever structure it might be in). I freak. As for hats on the bed in my own home, it simply does not happen. My wife even knows not to do it.

    Also, clear glasses containing liquid on top of a light colored surface. Not in my house! Doesn't happen. Putting them on a dark surface is completely acceptable.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  24. scrooge

    scrooge

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    SPIDERS!!!!!!!!

    Posted 2 years ago #
  25. mcitinner1

    mcitinner1

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    Damn fluffie... I hope you're joking a little bit.

    Stan
    Godfrey Daniels!!
    The Plenipotent Key to Cope's Correct Card of the Peerless Pilgrimage to Saint Nicotine of the Holy Herb:
    Posted 2 years ago #
  26. snowyowl

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    How come no one has admitted to their fear?

    Nope. None. Some of us are functioning sociopaths and pipe smokers. Maybe there's a connection there? Now there's a topic!
    [Or as US Army told me when they moved me into Special Ops (circa 1972): "Some of us are better at compartmentalizing."]

    Posted 2 years ago #
  27. fluffie666

    fluffie666

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    Unfortunately, mctinner, I am truly that un-sane. You may feel free to use me as a point of reference in order to gauge your own mental stability. I will not be offended. There is such thing as a hydrophobic. I am not one of those. I do wash to keep tidey and do feel good about it.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  28. downinit

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    I just have run of the mill phobias like fear of heights and mild claustrophobia. I do have a friend that is afraid of birds (singular or many) that is not too uncommon but she has no idea where it comes from.

    [No man has the] right to mislead others, who have less access to history, and less leisure to study it. . . . Thus substituting falsehood and deception for truthful evidence and fair argument.
    — Abraham Lincoln, Cooper Union Address, 1860
    Posted 2 years ago #
  29. mso489

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    Don't really like heights, for example, though I've done some rock climbing, climbed some light houses (Hatteras for example), and climbed the freestanding spiral staircase in the dome of St. Paul's in London, among other height related efforts. But I don't think I'd want to ride a mule to the bottom of The Grand Canyon, although it is otherwise my kind of trip. I'm somewhat okay with bugs and spiders if I am being careful, and snakes likewise at a distance. I'm careful about water, but accepting. I try not to engage my phobias; usually that makes you more vulnerable.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  30. chasingembers

    Embers

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    Clowns, and stairs.

    Damnation seize my soul if I give you quarters, or take any from you.
    -Edward Teach
    Posted 2 years ago #
  31. kane

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    I believe a phobia is an irrational fear.
    Frank, from what you've described, I would say your fears are pretty rational.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  32. mayfair70

    mayfair70

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    I LOVE you guys !!

    Am I the only one with a phobia?

    Definitely NOT. Since you were brave enough to bare your soul and colon, I'll admit I have anxiety about being an automobile passenger. I got killed in a car accident in 1987 as a passenger. They had to revive me 4 times in ER. Thankfully, I'm not terribly freaked out about driving, though I am usually hyper-vigilant and long or challenging drives can take their toll (no pun intended).

    I've also developed an occasional phobia about murder-clowns and weird masks. I usually respond with violent impulses to those stimuli. Additionally, I have a definite aversion to orange folk and some other things. (edited)

    The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made. -Groucho Marx
    Mouse-catcher on The Black Frigate
    Posted 2 years ago #
  33. voorhees

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    I do not care for extremely tight spaces. The crawl through tunnels, under a low clearance house or cave sorta spaces. Never had to, but I refuse to.

    Jason
    Posted 2 years ago #
  34. ashdigger

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    I fear reading this thread.

    Ubi Ignis Est?
    Posted 2 years ago #
  35. scrumpyjack

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    What a crappy story!

    Posted 2 years ago #
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    aldecaker

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    Fine. If we're going to get all baring-our-souls and "I love you, man!" about it, the thought of outliving my retirement finances terrifies the living shit out of me.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  37. mothernaturewilleatusallforbreakfast

    mothernature

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    Dear Frank's Wife,
    Please let him smoke in the house.
    Thanks,
    Mother Nature

    I am scared of heights, social events, and riding in a car with my wife when she's driving.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  38. winton

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    I am afraid of heights, and dangerous snakes.

    Isn't anyone afraid of public speaking? I used to fear this. But during one of my jobs, I found a direct correlation between speaking and making money. That solved my problem.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  39. scrumpyjack

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    Wasps! Hate them! They will make me run around and scream like a girl.

    Posted 2 years ago #
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    aldecaker

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    Is it the golf shirts or the smug sense of entitlement?

    Posted 2 years ago #
  41. mayfair70

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    Ba-Dum...Ching!

    Posted 2 years ago #
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    aldecaker

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    Couldn't help myself.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  43. jpmcwjr

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    Tight underground spaces. I no longer go in them. Standing on a cliff edge with nothing to hang onto. But those are pretty rational. Don't know if it's a phobia, but I hate gore be it in a movie (just watched Patriot Day), or a televised operation. I don't like movies that deal in the supernatural or fantasy, unless Sci-Fi-Fi.

    Being tailgated at 70+ is both a phobia and a fear based in reality and percentages.

    I know that you believe you understood what you think I said, but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.
    Posted 2 years ago #
  44. voorhees

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    Public speaking was a big fear. Still don't like it but can muddle through. Heights? Nope, just a fear of impact.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  45. rhoadsie

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    Capnophobia

    Posted 2 years ago #
  46. chasingembers

    Embers

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    Luposlipaphobia

    Posted 2 years ago #
  47. dread

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    "Luposlipaphobia is the fear of being pursued by timber wolves around a kitchen table while wearing socks on a newly waxed floor."

    Now that's just silly.

    Or is it . . .

    Posted 2 years ago #
  48. mackeson

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    Wow, just wow.
    You made my fear of snakes and Alien anal probes seem like very small potatoes.
    Although you have to keep an eye on those alien ass freaks.

    "Once you go down the Lakeland path, forever will it dominate your destiny."
    -Apologies to Master Yoda
    Posted 2 years ago #
  49. chasingembers

    Embers

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    "Luposlipaphobia is the fear of being pursued by timber wolves around a kitchen table while wearing socks on a newly waxed floor."

    Now that's just silly.

    Or is it . . .

    It's only silly until you find yourself in the kitchen wearing socks after waxing the floor and you hear the howling......

    Posted 2 years ago #
  50. jkrug

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    Am I the only one with a phobia?

    Probably not....but the picture you painted in my soul has left me too flabbergasted to think straight??

    Posted 2 years ago #
  51. crow

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    I'm with Scrooge, spiders!!!!! Specifically banana spiders, as I've always called them. I'm normally a calm and level person, but I absolutely freak when I see one of those. Other than that heights is my other fear. Indianafrank, sorry to hear about your misfortune growing up. I do find it interesting the " home remedies" of later times. I suppose I should feel fortunate to have grown up in the 80's and my parent's philosophy was was doesn't kill me makes me stronger hahaa.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  52. sajgre

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    What I find interesting is the fact that everybody seems to be using enema bag at some point while here in Slovenia it is as far as I know non existent in home medicine. When would one use it except when constipated? I wonder what do we use that USA people don't.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  53. iamn8

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    I am absolutely terrified of phobias and people with phobias.

    Nate @ Moody AL
    Posted 2 years ago #
  54. lohengrin

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    Since I was a child I have a phobia (now it is just an annoyance) with dress buttons, above all those with a mother-of-pearl look.
    The only explanation I can find for this is that it started, maybe, after seeing the 1962 French movie "War of the Buttons".

    Posted 2 years ago #
  55. grouchydog

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    Well this thread started on an unexpected note...

    I finally fully accepted my phobia of needles when I was giving blood and started to get light-headed and woozy, THEN the nurse said "OK, I'm going to insert the needle now". I woke up a bit later with a nurse on either side of me unfolding my arms and a large orderly holding down on my chest. I told the nurse "this isn't really worth it for the donut and juice." She replied that it'd probably be best if I didn't come back.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  56. scloyd

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    Yes...two. Wheelchair handles/grips and a catheter shoved into my willy. No explanation about the wheelchair handles they just creep me out and I haven't had to have a catheter...yet.

    Posted 9 months ago #
  57. yohanan

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    a catheter shoved into my willy.

    I wince at the thought.


    Smoke What You Like, And Like What You Smoke...Regardless Of What Anyone Else Thinks...
    Posted 9 months ago #
  58. nitemair13

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    I have agoraphobia which ties into the anxiety disorder. I basically can't leave my house sometimes and when I do, I have to know where I'm going and then straight back home. Crowds are a no go, I'll lose it if I'm in a crowd.

    Also have a fear of wasps (got stung in the head by one as a kid) and mice, no idea what it is about mice but they freak me out.

    “A pipe is the fountain of contemplation, the source of pleasure, the companion of the wise; and the man who smokes, thinks like a philosopher and acts like a Samaritan.”
    -Edward George Bulwer-Lytton
    Posted 9 months ago #
  59. mso489

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    I have a persistent fear of phobias. That's kind of a joke, but I really don't want to lock up with fear about anything if I can help it. Snakes are interesting at a distance, and I don't mind touching a non-poisonous pet. What has always worried me is that I never see snakes out hiking or camping, and I know they're there. I guess I'm Mr. Magoo, stepping over then without knowing it. My oblivious attitude may be contagious to them.

    Posted 9 months ago #
  60. jpmcwjr

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    Actually, Frank of Indiana, I don't think that's a true phobia, unless someone is waving one about.


    Mysophobia — Fear of germs. ...
    Claustrophobia — Fear of small spaces. ...
    Astraphobia — Fear of thunder and lightning. ...
    Cynophobia — Fear of dogs. ...
    Agoraphobia — Fear of open or crowded spaces. ...
    Acrophobia — Fear of heights. ...
    Ophidiophobia — Fear of snakes. ...
    Arachnophobia — Fear of spiders.

    You have a well grounded aversion to same. I had an Aunt who was similarly obsessed with her offspring's bowel movements.

    I am developing an aversion to flying, perhaps a phobia. And I got my pilot's license years ago.

    Be well!

    Posted 9 months ago #
  61. bluto

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    Almost out of tobacco a phobia

    “listen: there’s a hell
    of a good universe next door; let’s go”
    Posted 9 months ago #
  62. cigrmaster

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    My phobia is when I have to have surgery for kidney stones and they leave a stent in me for a week or 2. It is like pissing glass every time I have to pee. It is mid evil torture at it's finest.

    Harris
    Posted 9 months ago #
  63. mso489

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    I think many phobias have a grounding in sensible aversions. Like, after a certain age, probably no one should get on a ladder. An alertness to snakes and spiders are sound reactions, as long as you don't come apart. And so on.

    Posted 9 months ago #
  64. warren

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    I fear waking up in the morning and finding my name in the obituaries and having wasted time shaving, showering and the like, when I could have just stayed in bed..

    A man without a shillelagh is a man without an expedient.
    Posted 9 months ago #
  65. olkofri

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    Acridophobia, lepidopterophobia, among others.

    Not the sweet, new grass with flowers is this harvesting of mine;
    Not the upland clover bloom...
    Posted 9 months ago #
  66. rmpeeps

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    Glitter. My mom used to shut us up in a dark closet when we misbehaved.
    One time, when I was 4, I got shut in the closet. As it turned out, it was locked; and the family went off for the weekend and forgot me. It was so dark, I shoved and climbed around trying to find a way out. Boxes fell around me, clothes surrounded me, something was gooey all over me and sticky. Apparently a heavy vase, or urn, fell and busted the doorknob off. I was out. The goo was Elmer’s glue from my older brother’s school cigar box, and when I looked in the mirror I was covered head to foot in multi-colored glitter and some kind of chunky dust.
    I was just about to get into the bathtub when my family got home. My parents just looked at me with a look of absolute horror. Mom apologized and made me a coconut cream pie.
    To this day I shudder at the Hallmark card aisle, and still don’t know where Uncle Fred was buried.

    Posted 9 months ago #
  67. scloyd

    scloyd

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    To clarify my wheelchair grips phobia. Wheelchairs don't bother me. It's the plastic grips, especially if they're white...the kind we had on our bicycle handlebars in the 60's.

    Posted 9 months ago #
  68. shanez

    shanez

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    I'm afraid of lots of things but I don't consider them phobias.

    For example, I used to be afraid of heights but I now do rappelling and limited rock climbing. I'm not so much afraid of heights as I am afraid of falling from heights which is a perfectly normal thing to be afraid of and I can overcome that with self confidence in my rappelling/climbing skills.

    I realized it wasn't an issue of heights when I realized I wasn't afraid of seeing the ground so far below from an airplane or from a high building because I was always confident the plane wouldn't simply "fall" out of the sky or the building collapse. So what was the reason for my fear on a cliff? My self confidence in my ability to not suddenly "fly" off the ground. It did take me a while to get passed my vertigo but once I did that I never looked back.

    See. All perfectly rational and not a phobia, just a perfectly normal fear.

    My perfectly irrational fear that is bonafide I can at least make fun of myself for:

    Oddly enough I've done some snorkeling around a shark (nurse shark, around 8') and was okay with it. In a swimming pool where it's just not possible? That's when I have a problem. Especially at night or when I'm by myself. And I only have a 9x18 54" deep above ground pool... I know it's stupid, impossible, and irrational but I can't shake it.

    I've read it could be related to a fear of the dark but more likely a lack of confidence in my ability to sense and respond to potential dangers that might be present outside of my "sphere of awareness".

    Posted 9 months ago #
  69. chasingembers

    Embers

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    I'm still standing by luposlipaphobia.

    Posted 9 months ago #
  70. npod

    npod

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    My phobia is the enema bag. I grew up in the 50’s with a mother who had a fondness for giving enemas.

    As a Gastroenterologist, I can concur that many people have this experience and this phobia. It was a very common practice in the 1950's/1960's and many Mothers completely ruined their kids by forcing this odd ritual on them. I hear this concern very frequently.

    Now back to pipe smoking and pipe discussion.

    Neal
    Posted 9 months ago #

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