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youngpiper1

Might Stick Around
Jun 6, 2013
89
0
A friend of mine on here sent me some pipe tobacco , a few actually did. my grandfather found one of those packages and sent it to be drug tested. He is convinced you can't send pipe tobacco through the mail, that its illegal, it never occurred to him that someone could just be generous. He is going to the post office tomorrow to give it to them, and ask them, he won't believe me. My mothers cancer has come back, and he keeps saying he knows the law when he doesn't. He even went as far to say that if he catches me smoking it again, or if i order anything related to it that I can find a new place to live... so needless to say i have to quit until I find my own place I will still stay on the forum. He says that we could go to jail lol, he thinks we can go to jail, because he thinks its illegal

 

pruss

Lifer
Feb 6, 2013
3,558
370
Mytown
Hey there bud.
Sorry that you're going through this. It sounds like a pretty unpleasant time, especially given the hard feelings that are no doubt floating around as a result. I think you're wise to curtail your smoking to keep the peace in the short term. Someone else's house generally means someone else's rules; regardless of whether the rules are fair, wise, generous or pleasant. I am truly sorry to hear that your mom's cancer came back. That can't make this any easier.
Best wishes youngpiper1. I'm sending you good vibes.
-- Pat

 

youngpiper1

Might Stick Around
Jun 6, 2013
89
0
yeah there are some forclosed homes here in good condition for sale that i can afford on my wage (less then rent would be ) i'm going to call the realtors tomorrow and see if any of the properties are rent to own

 

dochudson

Lifer
May 11, 2012
1,635
12
yeah there are some forclosed homes here in good condition for sale that i can afford on my wage (less then rent would be ) i'm going to call the realtors tomorrow and see if any of the properties are rent to own
rent is a fixed amount per month any major repairs are on the landlord. buying a house, particularly one foreclosed on which may not be in the best of shape,d will require a lot of work, not to mention mowing grass (buying mower), something always needing fixed.. plus insurance on a house will be way more then renter insurance.
grandfather might be a little over the edge since your mother has cancer again. I guessing you and grandfather not hitting off isn't helping your mother. how about backing off and not cause more stress for anyone. smoke away from the house and give grandfather a hand when you are around.

 

fnord

Lifer
Dec 28, 2011
2,746
8
Topeka, KS
Youngpiper:
Read Doc's advice and then read it again.
Lower your stress level, and your grandfather's, by lighting a burner and taking a long, slow walk around the block and then going back inside to do what's best for you mom.
I'm watching my 90 year old f-i-l die by inches while his daughter/my wife and my m-i-l are taking it in shifts and cutting each other immense amounts of slack when we all blow and yell, "What the Hell?"
It's only get to get harder, kiddo, and I hope - no, I pray, you can go in peace.
Fnord

 

plateauguy

Lifer
Mar 19, 2013
2,412
21
grandfather might be a little over the edge since your mother has cancer again. I guessing you and grandfather not hitting off isn't helping your mother. how about backing off and not cause more stress for anyone. smoke away from the house and give grandfather a hand when you are around.

______________________________________________________________
Doc's advice is the best you can get.
Grampa can't control what is happening to your mom, so he's trying to control other areas of his life (you). This isn't an easy situation for anyone. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

 

roadqueen

Starting to Get Obsessed
Apr 9, 2013
267
4
So sorry to hear that your mother's cancer has returned, youngpiper1. The advice that you've received already is about the soundest that I can think of as well. Take long walks to puff and escape for a while, and keep your grandfather and mother's stress levels down for the time being.
It's hard to leave home, it's even harder to do so under circumstances of hard feelings between you and your family. I know this from experience. Keep the peace for now, in a few years you'll be glad you did.
Best wishes, I'm also sending good vibes your way.

 

dlattim

Starting to Get Obsessed
Oct 27, 2012
233
2
Youngpiper1 I'd like to hear what your Grandfather says after he tries to turn your tobacco in to the post office and they tell him that it's no problem. Considering the circumstances I think you have no choice but to honor his wishes as long as you live there.
Sorry about your mom. I'll be praying for her and your family.

 

easterntraveler

Part of the Furniture Now
Dec 29, 2012
805
11
Has he always been like this? Seems like this could be related to your mother's illness (the way he is acting). Just a thought.
Best wishes.

 

numbersix

Lifer
Jul 27, 2012
5,449
53
youngpiper, your grandfather is misinformed, but like doc says, best advice is to let it pass and not aggravate the situation. Your mom will need as much support and peace as she can get - so no sense in making the situation more difficult (even if you're technically not in the wrong).
Stay on the forum - and hope you can find a place of your own. Good luck.

 

flmason

Lifer
Oct 8, 2012
1,131
2
Definately reconsider renting a home that is being foreclosed. Many times the landlord might be the owner of the property and the landlord will collect rent from you but not make the mortgage payment to the bank.
You are paying your rent in good faith but the landlord is not living up to his/her responsibilities. In the end you will be required to move to another residence and moving might not be under the best conditions. Example given proper time to move or having saved enough money to complete the move.
I will pray for you and your family. I hope all will work out better.

 

winton

Lifer
Oct 20, 2010
2,318
771
As a mortgage underwriter, I decide yes or no, I strongly suggest against buying a foreclosure house. If a person isn't paying the mortgage, he isn't doing any maintenance either. You could be walking into a world of work. I could keep going, but trust me. Bad Idea!
If you really want out, rent somewhere else for a while. You probably will find the grass is not greener. The best advice would be to make peace with your Grandpa.
Winton

 

pchitti

Starting to Get Obsessed
Aug 26, 2013
193
1
Central Texas
Keep with his wishes while you are in his home. If you still feel the need to purchase tobacco and or receive packages, get a PO box. They are cheaper than rent for anything.
I may be the only one that asks this, but you are over the legal age to use tobacco products right?

 

trailspike48

Part of the Furniture Now
Jan 15, 2013
767
2
Only buy a foreclosure if you have it throughly inspected by a reputable inspector, AND, if you are handy with tools. They can be a good deal especially if the house is a recent build, but buyer beware. A good realtor can be a big help.

+1 more for Doc's advice. I hope your mom is doing well.

 
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